If you knocked on my door today....

[Kätzchen]

If... NovellaFemme happened to knock on my door right now....

I would very quietly open the door, tell her to be very, very, very quiet with my big beautiful blue eyes and whisper quietly that if she even thinks about crying or hugging me too tight, I will punish her by making her go straight to the bathroom to see if she put her panties on right!

Shhhhhhh! *LOL*

After all the quiet commotion at the door, I would quickly drag her into the house and we would go out into the kitchen and find something to eat and make a cup of hot chocolate (with Kahlua, of course, it IS the middle of the night).

[Glenn]

I'd jump out of bed. *No social calls at this hour*Grab the gun under my pillow, unlock the safety.
Since I am on a crutch, due to sprained tendons, I will hobble to the door and yell through the door-"step twenty paces back or I'll shoot through the door and drag your body inside."
Strap on my pistol, and grab my shotgun.
Hobble over to the alarm, and activate that. Still holding on to crutch on one arm and shotgun in the other.
Hobble around the house to turn on the five flood lights.
Hobble over to one of the six exit doors.
Crawl around the entire house in the woods to see who else is with you..
By then, about four squad cars will show up.
You announce to us all that you are only an innocent member from here who has an invisible jet, and I will say hello to you, you will say bye, and the police will think we were just some nuts and leave.

Probably clutch my imaginary pacemaker in shock that one of ya has made it over the pond.


Then I'd invite you in, entreat you to make yourself at home and park yer bum, then put a tea tray together. Crumpets or fig rolls?

[Nomad]

Originally Posted by Daktari

Probably clutch my imaginary pacemaker in shock that one of ya has made it over the pond.


Then I'd invite you in, entreat you to make yourself at home and park yer bum, then put a tea tray together. Crumpets or fig rolls?

(crumpets please)


if you knocked on my door today i'd settle you into the comfiest chair in the miniscule garden spot i've carved out for myself here in the middle of the urban desolation, where you could listen to the exceptional Cubano music that's coming over the fence from next door and sip the beverage of your choice. and i'd leave you to enjoy that peace. it was a long trip after all.

[funkyfemme]

Originally Posted by Glenn

I'd jump out of bed. *No social calls at this hour*Grab the gun under my pillow, unlock the safety.
Since I am on a crutch, due to sprained tendons, I will hobble to the door and yell through the door-"step twenty paces back or I'll shoot through the door and drag your body inside."
Strap on my pistol, and grab my shotgun.
Hobble over to the alarm, and activate that. Still holding on to crutch on one arm and shotgun in the other.
Hobble around the house to turn on the five flood lights.
Hobble over to one of the six exit doors.
Crawl around the entire house in the woods to see who else is with you..
By then, about four squad cars will show up.
You announce to us all that you are only an innocent member from here who has an invisible jet, and I will say hello to you, you will say bye, and the police will think we were just some nuts and leave.

[Dance-with-me]

If any new never-met friend showed up at my door, I'd be initially mortified at the state of my house (boxes and people and mess everywhere), then additionally mortified at the treatment you'd get from my ex who is still living there (along with his junkie daughter, her loser freeloader boyfriend/babydaddy #3, and her 3 kids - two of which I've raised for most of their lives).

I'd shuffle you out the door, walk with you to my town's little coffee shop, diner or bar (depending on time of day), get to know you, and beg you to. One.back again in 24 days when they all FINALLY move out.

[Nomad]

Originally Posted by Dance-with-me

If any new never-met friend showed up at my door, I'd be initially mortified at the state of my house (boxes and people and mess everywhere), then additionally mortified at the treatment you'd get from my ex who is still living there (along with his junkie daughter, her loser freeloader boyfriend/babydaddy #3, and her 3 kids - two of which I've raised for most of their lives).

I'd shuffle you out the door, walk with you to my town's little coffee shop, diner or bar (depending on time of day), get to know you, and beg you to. One.back again in 24 days when they all FINALLY move out.

if YOU knocked on my door i'd sweep you into a hug, drag you in, settle you in the remaining empty bedroom, offer up my best fluffy towel and good smelling bath stuff, send you off to a relaxing hot tub, make you food, let you choose the music, gab with you until you were tired and send you off to bed. rinse and repeat every day after that until your home was your own again. (and i'd send in advance scouts to make sure you went home to a sparkly clean safe haven too!)

(((huggage)))

[Dance-with-me]

If any new never-met friend showed up at my door, I'd be initially mortified at the state of my house (boxes and people and mess everywhere), then additionally mortified at the treatment you'd get from my ex who is still living there (along with his junkie daughter, her loser freeloader boyfriend/babydaddy #3, and her 3 kids - two of which I've raised for most of their lives).

I'd shuffle you out the door, walk with you to my town's little coffee shop, diner or bar (depending on time of day), get to know you, and beg you to. One.back again in 24 days when they all FINALLY move out.

[thedivahrrrself]

Originally Posted by Dance-with-me

If any new never-met friend showed up at my door, I'd be initially mortified at the state of my house (boxes and people and mess everywhere), then additionally mortified at the treatment you'd get from my ex who is still living there (along with his junkie daughter, her loser freeloader boyfriend/babydaddy #3, and her 3 kids - two of which I've raised for most of their lives).

I'd shuffle you out the door, walk with you to my town's little coffee shop, diner or bar (depending on time of day), get to know you, and beg you to. One.back again in 24 days when they all FINALLY move out.

If you showed up at my door, I'd give you my couch and chaise and beg you to get them off my hands.

[*Anya*]

Originally Posted by thedivahrrrself

If you showed up at my door, I'd give you my couch and chaise and beg you to get them off my hands.

If you showed up @ my door, first I would have to curtsy because, after all, you are the Queen of Awesomeness.

Then I would invite you in for your beverage of choice, have you sit and enjoy that brain and sense of humor of yours and would thoroughly enjoy my time with you.

Oh! I would also ask you how the hell you walk in those very high heels and ask if you would give me lessons like Miss Jay or Mr. Jay would on America's Next Top Model!

[Bèsame*]

I'd answer, and be thankful it was house cleaning day. You would smell the candles burning. I'd give you a house tour, especially to my fav room *wink*. That room explains so much about me. I'd offer you a drink and we would sit on the back porch and chat. Oh, turn on some music and perhaps, you would ask me to dance as the sun set.

[Nomad]

Originally Posted by Glenn

I'd jump out of bed. *No social calls at this hour*Grab the gun under my pillow, unlock the safety.
Since I am on a crutch, due to sprained tendons, I will hobble to the door and yell through the door-"step twenty paces back or I'll shoot through the door and drag your body inside."
Strap on my pistol, and grab my shotgun.
Hobble over to the alarm, and activate that. Still holding on to crutch on one arm and shotgun in the other.
Hobble around the house to turn on the five flood lights.
Hobble over to one of the six exit doors.
Crawl around the entire house in the woods to see who else is with you..
By then, about four squad cars will show up.
You announce to us all that you are only an innocent member from here who has an invisible jet, and I will say hello to you, you will say bye, and the police will think we were just some nuts and leave.

no disrespect meant to Glenn
this is anxiety producing. slightly triggering, if i'm honest. pun definitely not intended
just speaking for myself (and fighting off the urge to apologize for my feelings)

[jac]

If you knocked on my door today... you probably wouldn't get an answer cause I am not there... I am here with my Spritz. You can understand, right?

[laruss]

I would totally understand as I would much rather be with my girl too.

Originally Posted by stone4play

If you knocked on my door today... you probably wouldn't get an answer cause I am not there... I am here with my Spritz. You can understand, right?

[laruss]

Note to self (yes, I know this is the wrong thread)...
Avoid Michigan in my travels, it sounds dangerous.

Up here in friendly Canada we do not usually greet people with a gun. Just sayin'.

You sound very afraid, and now I am too. I may just have to stay up here on my side of the border where I won't get shot when I go visiting.

Originally Posted by Glenn

I'd jump out of bed. *No social calls at this hour*Grab the gun under my pillow, unlock the safety.
Since I am on a crutch, due to sprained tendons, I will hobble to the door and yell through the door-"step twenty paces back or I'll shoot through the door and drag your body inside."
Strap on my pistol, and grab my shotgun.
Hobble over to the alarm, and activate that. Still holding on to crutch on one arm and shotgun in the other.
Hobble around the house to turn on the five flood lights.
Hobble over to one of the six exit doors.
Crawl around the entire house in the woods to see who else is with you..
By then, about four squad cars will show up.
You announce to us all that you are only an innocent member from here who has an invisible jet, and I will say hello to you, you will say bye, and the police will think we were just some nuts and leave.

[Nomad]

Originally Posted by laruss

Note to self (yes, I know this is the wrong thread)...
Avoid Michigan in my travels, it sounds dangerous.

Up here in friendly Canada we do not usually greet people with a gun. Just sayin'.

You sound very afraid, and now I am too. I may just have to stay up here on my side of the border where I won't get shot when I go visiting.

if you knocked on my door i'd say "how'd you get through all that border patrol you dangerous Canadian?! did they frisk ya for contraband? demand your papers? fingerprints? shoe size? go over your car with a microscope? demand you submit to all manner of very personal probing? ask a lot of nonsensical questions? put a tracking anklet on you? hold your favorite shoes hostage to insure your return over the border?"

[cinnamongrrl]

You'd find the house in some disarray...but it's because we happily found a lovely cabinet which will relieve some of our kitchen storage issues.... The drawers had to be taken out to get it into the house, it's sooo heavy..but very well made. I just have to get it cleaned up and throw it back together...(possibly paint it)...but today is a busy day, so my house will be in chaos till later...


I'm so grateful my guy has an eye for finds!!

[Aryon]

I'd have to make a pot of tea (which I don't drink so it might not be that good). Then I would wait for you to curtsey *grins* ... and no, the Queen won't be there.

[StrongButch]

Id ask you to cook me dinner! (lol)

[Rockinonahigh]

If you knocked on my door today you would find me working out,I would be all hot and sweaty..