Lessons Learned: Would You or Would You Not.....

Blade · 10-30-2012, 02:26 PM

After rereading this thread, the question came to mind. If you had ask person A about person B. Would you believe what they had said? Would you take a step back and slow down, pay closer attention or would you think oh he/she was just that way with so and so. Or he/she isn't like that with me and ignore person A's warnings. Do you pay attention to the good things person A says about person B even though you have heard some not so favorable things about person B. How many people's opinions is enough? I mean could everyone be wrong/right?

imperfect_cupcake · 10-30-2012, 02:53 PM

Oh I'd answer if it was a friend, of course! They are asking for my opinion on what I know. Most of my friends are mature enough to make up their own minds - they are asking for information that could be important. For example, a friend called Flick started dating someone local and asked me and a mate what we thought as she was feeling hesitant. It's a good thing she asked. Niether of us knew she had gone out with him. He had a restraining order from his last gf and drank and got into fights. So we told her.

I hope to hell that if I ask a friend "hey you know so and so right? she's asked me out. You know anything I should know?" someone tells me. Last time someone did that was my detached wife... she told me "LINDA??? oh jesus Barb. yeah, she's dapper and funny. But she is absolutely mental. I love her to bits but Barb, I think you've had a hard enough time recently to put up with her heavy drinking and inability to to have a quiet night in. Your choice and you often don't listen to me, but I think you are asking for trouble. "

I went out with her keeping this information in mind and it backed up what I saw in one date.

There is nothing at all wrong with asking friends for their opinion on clothes, neighbourhoods, or people. As long as we keep in mind it's an opinion and nothing more - unless it's some facts, like a restraining order has been taken out etc.

kittygrrl · 10-30-2012, 07:41 PM

"an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure"
However, personally I've always been very careful about giving my (so called) opinion..but sure if someone is a real trainwreck..i might be tempted but rilly when it comes to relationships..if there is smoke there is usually a fire and anything you say to someone whose fire has been lit is more or less ignored..if you're tempted- saying less is probably better for someone to nibble on then spilling your guts about all you know..they can always ask for more if they want it.

View Poll Results: flip a qoin?
yes....	8	14.81%
no....	6	11.11%
depends on person /situation	40	74.07%
Voters: 54. You may not vote on this poll

10-30-2012, 02:26 PM	#1
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	After rereading this thread, the question came to mind. If you had ask person A about person B. Would you believe what they had said? Would you take a step back and slow down, pay closer attention or would you think oh he/she was just that way with so and so. Or he/she isn't like that with me and ignore person A's warnings. Do you pay attention to the good things person A says about person B even though you have heard some not so favorable things about person B. How many people's opinions is enough? I mean could everyone be wrong/right? __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

10-30-2012, 07:41 PM	#3
kittygrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: witchy Preferred Pronoun?: gf Relationship Status: Moon in Gemini Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: in the wild mushrooms Posts: 9,691 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,711 Thanked 22,141 Times in 7,212 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	i've learned "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure" However, personally I've always been very careful about giving my (so called) opinion..but sure if someone is a real trainwreck..i might be tempted but rilly when it comes to relationships..if there is smoke there is usually a fire and anything you say to someone whose fire has been lit is more or less ignored..if you're tempted- saying less is probably better for someone to nibble on then spilling your guts about all you know..they can always ask for more if they want it. __________________ "We're nine meals from anarchy"" Lewis

10-30-2012, 02:53 PM	#2
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Oh I'd answer if it was a friend, of course! They are asking for my opinion on what I know. Most of my friends are mature enough to make up their own minds - they are asking for information that could be important. For example, a friend called Flick started dating someone local and asked me and a mate what we thought as she was feeling hesitant. It's a good thing she asked. Niether of us knew she had gone out with him. He had a restraining order from his last gf and drank and got into fights. So we told her. I hope to hell that if I ask a friend "hey you know so and so right? she's asked me out. You know anything I should know?" someone tells me. Last time someone did that was my detached wife... she told me "LINDA??? oh jesus Barb. yeah, she's dapper and funny. But she is absolutely mental. I love her to bits but Barb, I think you've had a hard enough time recently to put up with her heavy drinking and inability to to have a quiet night in. Your choice and you often don't listen to me, but I think you are asking for trouble. " I went out with her keeping this information in mind and it backed up what I saw in one date. There is nothing at all wrong with asking friends for their opinion on clothes, neighbourhoods, or people. As long as we keep in mind it's an opinion and nothing more - unless it's some facts, like a restraining order has been taken out etc.