Single FTM's & Femme's

[EmpressM]

{{{{Graffiti}}}}

Here's to a quick recovery! Flu is no fun!

Tread carefully here sugar, but definitely ask her out for something casual where you two can talk. Communication is a key foundation in any relationship, and I would definitely suggest cutting out the middlemen to ensure you are on the same page and nothing is lost in translation.

It's obvious you really like this girl, however I feel it is prudent to identify where she is mentally and emotionally, especially knowing that she is unsure about your being trans. The last thing you want to be is a curiosity to her only to realize later she can't deal, after you are emotionally invested.

A red flag for me in your post was her stating that she would be interested after the final surgery, then stating a different attitude in a conversation with a mutual friend. While humans often change their minds, there's a difference in "waffling" and a definitive change in convictions. Only thorough a face to face interaction are you going to be able to assess where she truly stands. Should all go well, it could be the gateway to setting aside your fears and feeling comfortable asking her out! Having an open, honest conversation will help you determine the best thing for you, and ultimately the future of your relationship with this girl, whether it's staying just friends or something more!

Best of luck on this journey!

Originally Posted by GraffitiBoi

Popping in to say hi and maybe get some advice. There is a femme I have had a crush on for 2 years now. I never pursued it because she is straight. I found out recently that she actually is interested in me but is unsure of the whole trans thing. She knows I am trans and had told a mutual friend of ours several months ago that she would be interested after I have the final surgery.

Somehow she got the mistaken idea talking to me that I was going to have lower surgery. I am not. The technology for it just isn't good enough (in my opinion) and there are things (sexual) that I like about being female from the waist down and won't trade that if the technology for phalloplasty isn't good enough for me.

When I told this to our friend he actually went back and told her. Somehow he worked it into the conversation naturally. Apparently my 'crush' talks about me a lot with a couple of different friends of ours. They have all come to me and told me about their conversations. Usually if she wants to know something personal she just talks to me. BUT... she has talked to more than one person about being with me. Now she has said (verified by more than one source) that she's interested regardless if I have the surgery or not.

So my dilemma... Do I try and ask her out? I don't think asking her will ruin the friendship. That's pretty strong between us. I don't know if I am brave enough or bold enough to ask her and I'm not sure how to ask her out. I've dated a straight woman before. It was the longest lasting and most loving relationship I have ever had. (That ex told me yesterday that she misses me and would date me again. Sorry, but I'm not interested in going back to her.)

I'm rambling. I'm tired. I have a touch of the flu. LOL But... I will be seeing this person tonight when I go in to work. She's supposed to be coming over to my place sometime soon to pick up some furniture I'm giving to her and she will probably come to my birthday party in a few weeks.