Lets talk about exes....... - Page 2

Soft*Silver · 04-06-2010, 07:37 PM

I have learned that when I cant be friends with an ex, its because of MY behavior, not theirs. Thats a hard pill to swallow but in my personal experience, this is the Truth that sticks....

bigbutchmistie · 04-06-2010, 07:42 PM

I am friends with some of my exes. Two in particular that Im really close too. One of which I will attend their wedding soon, and hang out with, and go to church with. I never thought after we broke up that it would turn out this way. We both admit why it didnt work. Not because of something she did or didnt do or what I did or didnt do. Just sometimes things just dont work. Doeesnt mean we cant be friends. And we are really good friends. I am great friends with her fiancee. Who I think is a wonderful person. I love her friendship to death.

The other one is my first love. We have been through everything as friends and she broke it off cause of her cancer years ago... Our paths have led us to lead separate lives. And thats fine. If we were meant for each other we would have already ended up together.

Whoever I end up with, is going to have to accept my friendship with them. They have always been there and will always be..

Its not sexual or any romantic feelings there for me. Although I willalways care about each of them...

Other exes are just plain crazy and I dont want them in my life. Its not healthy for me.

So I say depends on the situation and the people if exes should be friends...

Cowboi · 04-06-2010, 08:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by June

Just so you know. This thread is making me want to go sit in a corner and bang my head against the wall. It's only a matter of time before someone here thinks you're talking about THEM.

Please be careful not to bring personal drama in here with exes and people who are online in our community.

Gives Miss June a crash helmet. Stay safe out there!

Forgetmenotfemme · 04-06-2010, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

That's pretty generalized. Actually, my most recent ex is a very lovely person who did neither of those things.

That was not directed to anyone person..please get your facts straight

Gemme · 04-06-2010, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

That was not directed to anyone person..please get your facts straight

My facts are just fine, thank you.

You said "They lie and cheat" which is a very generalized comment about exes, applying those traits to *all* exes. I never said you were directing it towards anyone specific. I provided you with an example of an ex of mine who was not either of those things. Perhaps a space between the lines would have made that more clear, however, I thought it would be nicer than telling you that you sounded bitter.

Forgetmenotfemme · 04-06-2010, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

My facts are just fine, thank you.

You said "They lie and cheat" which is a very generalized comment about exes, applying those traits to *all* exes. I never said you were directing it towards anyone specific. I provided you with an example of an ex of mine who was not either of those things. Perhaps a space between the lines would have made that more clear, however, I thought it would be nicer than telling you that you sounded bitter.

Did it cross your mind that I was talking about someone in my life yers ago. Oh of course not.

Gemme · 04-06-2010, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

Did it cross your mind that I was talking about someone in my life yers ago. Oh of course not.

Obviously, you are primed for a fight.

Have a lovely evening.

*disengaging*

Forgetmenotfemme · 04-06-2010, 08:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Obviously, you are primed for a fight.

Have a lovely evening.

*disengaging*

No maam I was talking about an ex of 16 yrs seems you want to make a mountain out of a mole hill

Forgetmenotfemme · 04-06-2010, 08:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Obviously, you are primed for a fight.

Have a lovely evening.

*disengaging*

No maam I was talking about an ex of 16 yrs seems you want to make a mountain out of a mole hill
__________________

Corkey · 04-06-2010, 08:51 PM

This is why I hate treads like this. Don't talk about your ex, talk about your shortcomings. Your ex isn't here to defend themselves, and if they were it's a whole lot of drama for no good reason.

you meaning general

Forgetmenotfemme · 04-06-2010, 08:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by June

Just so you know. This thread is making me want to go sit in a corner and bang my head against the wall. It's only a matter of time before someone here thinks you're talking about THEM.

Please be careful not to bring personal drama in here with exes and people who are online in our community.

June I was talking of an ex of 16 yrs thats all..

Waldo · 04-06-2010, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

exes are a waste of time.Too much trouble.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

They lie and cheat

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

That was not directed to anyone person..please get your facts straight

Quote:

Originally Posted by Forgetmenotfemme

June I was talking of an ex of 16 yrs thats all..

FMNF - I think you may be missing the point.

You said something very generalized - implying that all exes were liars and cheats.. Someone called you on that fact. You then say it's not directly at anyone in particular and then follow that up with saying it IS IN FACT about someone in particular.

So. Sucks that someONE lied to you and cheated on YOU.

BUT that doesn't mean all exes are liars and cheaters or wastes of time.

However, saying things like this in a thread of this nature? Just really not the best idea.

Generalizations kind of suck. Might I suggest:

"Years ago I had someone lie to me and cheat on me. Ever since then I don't waste my time on exes". It gets across your point and avoids generalizing all exes.

Kobi · 04-06-2010, 09:14 PM

I try and start threads with some substance and commonality that we all experience as people. Sometimes it works, sometimes, it doesnt.

Thank you to those who understood what the thread was about.

My apologies to those who are still obviously healing from some bad experiences.

June please close this thread.

Admin · 04-06-2010, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kobi

I try and start threads with some substance and commonality that we all experience as people. Sometimes it works, sometimes, it doesnt.

Thank you to those who understood what the thread was about.

My apologies to those who are still obviously healing from some bad experiences.

June please close this thread.

We'll close it, Kobi. Thanks for trying

04-06-2010, 07:37 PM	#21
SoftSilver Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: rose cottage Posts: 5,592 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,948 Thanked 15,908 Times in 4,062 Posts Rep Power*: 21474857	I have learned that when I cant be friends with an ex, its because of MY behavior, not theirs. Thats a hard pill to swallow but in my personal experience, this is the Truth that sticks.... __________________ Pole bachit, a lis chuye. The field sees, the forest hears

04-06-2010, 08:51 PM	#30
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,270 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	This is why I hate treads like this. Don't talk about your ex, talk about your shortcomings. Your ex isn't here to defend themselves, and if they were it's a whole lot of drama for no good reason. you meaning general __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

04-06-2010, 09:14 PM	#33
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,636 Times in 7,642 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	I give up I try and start threads with some substance and commonality that we all experience as people. Sometimes it works, sometimes, it doesnt. Thank you to those who understood what the thread was about. My apologies to those who are still obviously healing from some bad experiences. June please close this thread. __________________

04-06-2010, 07:42 PM	#22
bigbutchmistie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Since You Need A Label. Butch Relationship Status: Still Dreaming Of My Happily Ever After Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Arlington Texas Posts: 4,009 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,950 Thanked 5,364 Times in 1,941 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I am friends with some of my exes. Two in particular that Im really close too. One of which I will attend their wedding soon, and hang out with, and go to church with. I never thought after we broke up that it would turn out this way. We both admit why it didnt work. Not because of something she did or didnt do or what I did or didnt do. Just sometimes things just dont work. Doeesnt mean we cant be friends. And we are really good friends. I am great friends with her fiancee. Who I think is a wonderful person. I love her friendship to death. The other one is my first love. We have been through everything as friends and she broke it off cause of her cancer years ago... Our paths have led us to lead separate lives. And thats fine. If we were meant for each other we would have already ended up together. Whoever I end up with, is going to have to accept my friendship with them. They have always been there and will always be.. Its not sexual or any romantic feelings there for me. Although I willalways care about each of them... Other exes are just plain crazy and I dont want them in my life. Its not healthy for me. So I say depends on the situation and the people if exes should be friends...