Flirting in a Non-GLBT Space

[Nat]

Ha - I had a slight flirting fail today. I came out of a bathroom stall to the sight of a beautiful butchy-type person at the sinks who was dressed as one of the wait staff. Without thinking twice, an appreciative and slightly drawn-out, "hey there!" escaped my mouth. Because every butch wants to be hit on in a public bathroom at their job. Ha. Anyway, there was a quiet "hey," a rapid drying of hands and a quick escape. I totally forgot about it til I started catching up on this thread. It's not like I didn't mean it, but I wasn't invested either. Mostly in the moment following my utterance I was thinking, "shit I hope she knows I know she's not a man," and "way to make public bathrooms even more socially uncomfortable for a butch." Oops! I'm sure she's fine and all, but it wasn't my proudest flirty moment.

[imperfect_cupcake]

We did have a short conversation and I did make her laugh. Given the opportunity again she may remember me or not. I am sure there are a lot of butches that go in there every day and I probly melted into the crowd.

If someone flirts with you, trust me, they will remember you.

a friend of mine has this issue with cute girls... so I came up with a scenario... a mate of yours is walking down the street on the opposite side... you shout and wave but he keeps going. why do you think that happened? Her answer: he didn't hear me

Ok. cute girl that you know and like is walking down the street on the opposite side. you shout and wave but she keeps going. Why do you think that happened? her answer: cause she's trying to blank me, she's not interested in me, I'm not good looking enough for her.

RR if you don't flirt back, if just means you aren't interested. you won't get in trouble. that's why it's flirting. But if it's as bad as you say? then if her coworkers see her flirting with you? she could get harassed and bullied.

If you *want* to flirt back, then just follow her lead. If you don't, then don't.

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by Nat

Ha - I had a slight flirting fail today. I came out of a bathroom stall to the sight of a beautiful butchy-type person at the sinks who was dressed as one of the wait staff. Without thinking twice, an appreciative and slightly drawn-out, "hey there!" escaped my mouth. Because every butch wants to be hit on in a public bathroom at their job. Ha. Anyway, there was a quiet "hey," a rapid drying of hands and a quick escape. I totally forgot about it til I started catching up on this thread. It's not like I didn't mean it, but I wasn't invested either. Mostly in the moment following my utterance I was thinking, "shit I hope she knows I know she's not a man," and "way to make public bathrooms even more socially uncomfortable for a butch." Oops! I'm sure she's fine and all, but it wasn't my proudest flirty moment.

ugh. I know. that's my big fear. that I'll force sexualised attention on someone and they will feel harassed. it's often why I don't try twice at a firt and I have a hard time pushing anything if someone doesn't get it. to me doesn't get it looks just like not interested, go away. so I slink off feeling icky about myself fairly quickly.