Something horrible just happened

[starryeyes]

I have had this happen to me, so I know what you are going through... It isn't about you it's about her. Use this as an opportunity to make yourself a better person. Look at why you picked a partner with this potential, dig deep to see why you are attracted to people who have these tendencies. Has it happened before? In my case when I stepped back, I saw my pattern and I am working on me. I am so much happier and becoming much more healthier. Therapy is a good thing and can really help you recognize what's going on.

[anaisninja]

Originally Posted by starryeyes

I have had this happen to me, so I know what you are going through... It isn't about you it's about her. Use this as an opportunity to make yourself a better person. Look at why you picked a partner with this potential, dig deep to see why you are attracted to people who have these tendencies. Has it happened before? In my case when I stepped back, I saw my pattern and I am working on me. I am so much happier and becoming much more healthier. Therapy is a good thing and can really help you recognize what's going on.

Thanks. I am seeing a therapist. I have been for at least 6 months.

This did happen before. Less than 2 weeks ago, with a different person. Not exactly in the same way. But it was still hurtful and both of these together in such close succession are making me wonder about a lot of things.

[TruTexan]

Originally Posted by anaisninja

Thanks. I am seeing a therapist. I have been for at least 6 months.

This did happen before. Less than 2 weeks ago, with a different person. Not exactly in the same way. But it was still hurtful and both of these together in such close succession are making me wonder about a lot of things.

Anais, I would take a look at the choices you made in choosing to date them in the first place..........see if there were any red flags that you might have missed? Maybe, maybe not, but you certainly deserved better than how you were treated. That should tell you a lot about what kind of person they truly were in the first place and that you probably dodged a couple of bullets with those 2. Good luck in your therapy an I hope you are fully healed in no time flat.
therapy works if you work it.

[anaisninja]

Originally Posted by TruTexan

Anais, I would take a look at the choices you made in choosing to date them in the first place..........see if there were any red flags that you might have missed? Maybe, maybe not, but you certainly deserved better than how you were treated. That should tell you a lot about what kind of person they truly were in the first place and that you probably dodged a couple of bullets with those 2. Good luck in your therapy an I hope you are fully healed in no time flat.
therapy works if you work it.

They seemed like total opposites. And I chose #2 because she seemed so unlike #1. I am truly stumped by this. Maybe it was me. I'm the common denominator. Maybe I was trying too hard, with both of them.

[lyric]

Originally Posted by anaisninja

They seemed like total opposites. And I chose #2 because she seemed so unlike #1. I am truly stumped by this. Maybe it was me. I'm the common denominator. Maybe I was trying too hard, with both of them.

You know, there also might be such a thing as overanalyzing the entire situation. It's definitely possible that you ended up with two duds and there is nothing about YOU as the "common denominator" that factored into your experiences at all. In a package of peanut M&Ms, there are always a few mutant M&Ms in the package. It's possible, isn't it, that you just ended up with two emotional mutants in a row?

What happened to you truly sucks. The person was rude, inconsiderate, and cruel in their actions, and I can't add anything more to what others have said here in that I, too, believe this was about them and their lack of courage and manners rather than being about you or some deficit you may have. You deserved better, and I am crossing my fingers for better luck next time for you. *sending hugs your way