Ask a trans person!

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by deb0670

Dapper,
I thank God for You and for sharing this with me.
Thank You for understanding.
I will be looking for a therapist for our son Monday.

I have mentioned to him many times before about being butch, etc.. and even a gender to him, and every time he has been adamant that neither is the case.
I questioned him about wanting to be more like Dad (our son calls Ethan Dad), and just as adamantly he assured me that is not the case.
For awhile he was wavering back and forth, but he said it was mainly be he was scared of what Ethan and me would say. Our son said," I have never felt comfortable as a girl in a boy/girl relationship, nor a girl/girl relationship, and i am tired of pretending to be."

For years, he would dress and be androgynous. . But still did not feel right.

Ethan has been talking with our son a lot more now that our son has made up his mind and heart on who he is.

So.. i guess the best thing to do is find a therapist for him, and possibly for me to help any way I can.

Oh and, please know, I understand and believe You about
You not questioning my son's gender..
I truly appreciate You and Your help.

deb,

No problem, I am glad it was helpful. I admit that I get very nervous and cautious about young FTMs going on Testosterone. Their voice can drop like a rock after the first couple of shots. You cannot foretell how quickly it will drop or how low it will drop. It doesn't matter if the person starts with a deep voice to begin with or how deep their male relative's voices are. There is no correlation. As you probably know, voice changes are not reversible.

I feel much less anxious about a trans girl going on estrogen and testosterone blockers, she can change her mind and the T will flow back into her body like a demon. People aren't aware of how powerful of a hormone testosterone is and although I support "informed consent" where therapy is NOT a requirement, I admit that with adolescents/very young adults, it makes me nervous. There IS such a thing as transsexual regret. It does happen and it is very hard for the female bodied people who now have a male voice return to a female life. It can be very hard and painful. Hell, top surgery is reversible.

Anyway...the reason I responded to your post (sorry for the ramble) is if you are comfortable, PM me your city and I can ask on the WPATH listserve for a therapist in your area. Sorry I didn't think of that sooner.