Corny jokes

Happy_Go_Lucky · 07-02-2014, 05:37 AM

gotoseagrl · 07-03-2014, 02:08 AM

Happy_Go_Lucky · 07-03-2014, 05:40 AM

Space Matters

Wrang1er · 07-03-2014, 07:38 AM

What was the most popular dance in 1776?

The IndepenDANCE

What do you call a duck that says bang?

A firequacker

What did one flag say to the other flag?

Nothing, it just waved.

Happy 4th of July!

MysticOceansFL · 07-03-2014, 03:06 PM

Q: What is a astronaut's favorite place on the notebook?
A: The space bar!

Why was the computer tired when he got home?
Because he had a hard drive.

What do Scientists have for snacks?
Micro-chips.

Why did the computer get cold?
Because it forgot to close windows.

A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero" The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will be your loving companion for an entire week." The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want." Again the man took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."

Mopsie · 07-03-2014, 08:55 PM

Teacher : "Where did they sign the Declaration of Independence?"
Student: "At the bottom!"

Q: What did the colonists wear at the Boston Tea Party?
A: Tea-shirts!

Q: How do you have a good 4th?
A: You buy a 5th on the 3rd.

LadyLike · 07-03-2014, 09:59 PM

07-03-2014, 02:08 AM	#2
gotoseagrl Senior Member How Do You Identify?: old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?: mermaid, very lucky babygirl Relationship Status: Saltwater mermaid ♡ Join Date: May 2010 Location: CA Posts: 2,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,192 Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	__________________ Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

07-03-2014, 03:06 PM	#5
MysticOceansFL Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch, Preferred Pronoun?: People call me by my nic name. Relationship Status: Not Single, Not Desperate. Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Florida Posts: 3,833 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,645 Thanked 4,033 Times in 1,720 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Q: What is a astronaut's favorite place on the notebook? A: The space bar! Why was the computer tired when he got home? Because he had a hard drive. What do Scientists have for snacks? Micro-chips. Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows. A man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my hero" The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will be your loving companion for an entire week." The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket. The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want." Again the man took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket. Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?" The man said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool." __________________ Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. It is said, " Some lives are linked across time..... Connected by an ancient calling that echoes through the ages "......

07-03-2014, 08:55 PM	#6
Mopsie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Female ones Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: Shenandoah Valley Virginia Posts: 4,769 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 36,246 Thanked 8,552 Times in 1,856 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Happy 4th! Teacher : "Where did they sign the Declaration of Independence?" Student: "At the bottom!" Q: What did the colonists wear at the Boston Tea Party? A: Tea-shirts! Q: How do you have a good 4th? A: You buy a 5th on the 3rd.

07-03-2014, 09:59 PM	#7
LadyLike Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Female/Lady Join Date: May 2010 Location: Where the purple Mountains are Posts: 147 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 488 Thanked 366 Times in 76 Posts Rep Power: 3792826	__________________ I think it pisses God off when you walk by the color purple in a field and don't notice it. I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way. *If history repeats itself....I am so getting me a Dinosaur*

07-02-2014, 05:37 AM	#1
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

07-03-2014, 05:40 AM	#3
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Space Matters

07-03-2014, 07:38 AM	#4
Wrang1er Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Here Posts: 1,526 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	What was the most popular dance in 1776? The IndepenDANCE What do you call a duck that says bang? A firequacker What did one flag say to the other flag? Nothing, it just waved. Happy 4th of July!