T for Two and Two for T....

[julieisafemme]

Originally Posted by Words

It is a fantastic voyage but there are times - speaking of my personal experience here - when the voyage isn't quite so fantastic and I was curious as to whether or not I was alone in this.

I'll give you an example. I was prepared for the fact that in some respects, B's decision to go on T but not actually transition would somehow marginalize U/us even further than W/we were marginalized already. That, and the associated loneliness, I was prepared for. What I wasn't prepared for - and what, quite frankly, has taken me totally by surprise - is that even though B. still embraces Hys female self and is not actually transitioning, *I*, in most regards, relate to Hym as male. Not, in itself, a problem. Until I need my best friend, my female best friend, someone who, being a female herself, can understand what I'm going through. That 'someone' used to be B. And now it's not. Not because B. is no longer female but because *I* no longer relate to Hym as female and yes, that can, and does, sometimes make me feel lonely. (I'll give you a specific example. I have to undergo a test tomorrow that's pretty much focused on my 'girly bits'. It's a pretty high up there on the humilation kind of test and I'm not looking forward to it at all - truth is, I'm dreading it - but because it relates to my girly bits, I'm not comfortable talking about it with B.)

So...can anyone relate to this?

Words

Yes I can relate to this. To a song no. To this yes. I was not sure what your intent was with this thread.

I can't say I relate to my partner as a man. I don't relate to Him as a best girlfriend either. I do sometimes feel lonely in that others can't understand how I relate to Him. By others I mean family or straight friends.

I wonder if I relate to Him differently than you relate to B because I met Him post T and He is also my one and only queer partner? I had no expectations or anything to compare it to.

I am curious if you can define "relating to Hym as male". Although I do not experience my partner as she or as a woman at all, I do not relate to Him as a male in the way that I have related to biomales. Hope that makes sense.

Thanks for clarifying your intent. I hope you did not take my first post as flippant.