What are your life basics?

Shystonefem · 01-25-2015, 04:52 AM

Wow, great question.

I need my animals and to always have animals around.

I need to live in a place that is semi-rural yet close to water and a city... preferably a place on the water that is fairly close to a city.

I need time to myself for meditation, etc.

If I am coupled, I need that person to respect me and I would do the same.

I need to read, write and learn.

I need to live in a peaceful environment, without stress inside the home.

I need to have close friends that I trust.

princessbelle · 01-25-2015, 09:55 AM

I also believe "need" and "want" are way different, but i'll join in and think of it more in a "want" way.

Love. Unconditional, from family, friends.
Security. Feeling safe and out of harms way.
To feel needed. Helping people that reach out or those that can't but should.
Laughter. A day without laughing is a day wasted.
Sunshine. It warms my bones and my spirit.
Acceptance. To be who i am from my friends without judgement or prejudice.
Independence. Some of the time.
Quiet time. To think thoughts through, especially early in the day or when something is on my mind.
Understanding. That i goof up. I make mistakes. But, hey, we all do.

Last, but certainly not least, and something that has been on my mind more and more the past few months.....

Community. Without community i feel isolated, alone and strange in a foreign land where no one really understands my heart. (thank you planet)

imperfect_cupcake · 01-25-2015, 10:17 AM

Sorry. I meant like stated in the OP with Maslow's "hierarchy of needs". Taking out the bottom level. The link is up there if it's helpful for clarification on the word use of "need"? :/

JDeere · 01-25-2015, 11:55 AM

Food, water, shelter and clothes. But also friends and family. I try not too think too hard on things and keep it simple. Want and need are two different things for me. I will never get what i want but will almost certainly have what I need.

clay · 01-25-2015, 01:03 PM

~I need arts &crafts supplies and space ~~I need quiet time/space of my own daily....and am afforded that regularly. ~~I need my furbaby. She is a huge part of me and my world........for 10 years. ~~I need to view and enjoy the ocean regularly and seeing my dolphins! ~~I need social time with a select group of trusted friends. ~~I need social time for my most intimate of friends on this Planet! I love them each uniquely. ~~~I need my smudging rituals to cleanse my space and myself. ~~~I need my beloved crystals and healing stones, and my salt rock lamp. ~~I need my incense burns daily. ~~~I need, and do humbly appreciate my life, health, and wonderful partner all the time. ~~~I need to share my love for my very closest chosen family and friends often!

imperfect_cupcake · 01-25-2015, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by clay

~I need arts &crafts supplies and space ~~I need quiet time/space of my own daily....and am afforded that regularly. ~~I need my furbaby. She is a huge part of me and my world........for 10 years. ~~I need to view and enjoy the ocean regularly and seeing my dolphins! ~~I need social time with a select group of trusted friends. ~~I need social time for my most intimate of friends on this Planet! I love them each uniquely. ~~~I need my smudging rituals to cleanse my space and myself. ~~~I need my beloved crystals and healing stones, and my salt rock lamp. ~~I need my incense burns daily. ~~~I need, and do humbly appreciate my life, health, and wonderful partner all the time. ~~~I need to share my love for my very closest chosen family and friends often!

Thank you clay!

clay · 01-25-2015, 01:15 PM

you are so very welcome!

imperfect_cupcake · 01-25-2015, 01:08 PM

For those not clear about what I mean and you think I'm confusing wants with needs.... Ok sorry. I'll try again but I'll make sure I put the picture here:

(Edit to add: won't let me put an image in so I'm afraid you'll have to actually click it and look at it)

This is what I linked to. This is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.

I'm sayin' aside from the bottom layer oF listed physiological needs, HOW or WHAT things bring you the rest of your (as *Maslow* defines "needs") needs? How or what makes you content and happy, not just surviving. Like I'd never be content and happy living in a cement mixer even though it would keep the rain off me. I need to live where I have control over my own personal space or I get stressed out.

Thank you For your patience.

I've made a pigs ear of this thread, trying to articulate. But I hope I've done a better job now.

Cin · 01-31-2015, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by imperfect_cupcake

For those not clear about what I mean and you think I'm confusing wants with needs.... Ok sorry. I'll try again but I'll make sure I put the picture here:

(Edit to add: won't let me put an image in so I'm afraid you'll have to actually click it and look at it)

This is what I linked to. This is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs.

I'm sayin' aside from the bottom layer oF listed physiological needs, HOW or WHAT things bring you the rest of your (as *Maslow* defines "needs") needs? How or what makes you content and happy, not just surviving. Like I'd never be content and happy living in a cement mixer even though it would keep the rain off me. I need to live where I have control over my own personal space or I get stressed out.

Thank you For your patience.

I've made a pigs ear of this thread, trying to articulate. But I hope I've done a better job now.

Do you have to go from one layer to another in order? Can you jump to Self Esteem without first meeting your social needs? Can you skip safety and go right to self actualization? Is it only the needs of the bottom layer that must be met before you can move on to other layers?

imperfect_cupcake · 01-31-2015, 01:14 PM

Good question.

I don't know. I do know that when I didn't have the bottom row, other things like my gay rights, seemed fucking trivial.

Only recently have I gotten the second row in place. Ish. And I know in planning for my future, the second row is my highest priority. I have love and belonging. Not romantic love, but I am most certainly loved and I do belong in my little group of friends. I probably have more self esteem than ever before in my life. But that comes with age, usually. And I suppose self actualisation... That's taking me a life time to understand. And will continue till I croak no doubt.

So perhaps some things come in, in pieces, at different levels. But perhaps the general interest in developing them, the priority is most often given from lower to higher? I dunno.

What do you think?

01-25-2015, 09:55 AM	#2
princessbelle Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6,100 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,380 Thanked 30,496 Times in 5,198 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Very nice thread... I also believe "need" and "want" are way different, but i'll join in and think of it more in a "want" way. Love. Unconditional, from family, friends. Security. Feeling safe and out of harms way. To feel needed. Helping people that reach out or those that can't but should. Laughter. A day without laughing is a day wasted. Sunshine. It warms my bones and my spirit. Acceptance. To be who i am from my friends without judgement or prejudice. Independence. Some of the time. Quiet time. To think thoughts through, especially early in the day or when something is on my mind. Understanding. That i goof up. I make mistakes. But, hey, we all do. Last, but certainly not least, and something that has been on my mind more and more the past few months..... Community. Without community i feel isolated, alone and strange in a foreign land where no one really understands my heart. (thank you planet) __________________ ~ I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

01-25-2015, 11:55 AM	#4
JDeere Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Transgender Preferred Pronoun?: He/him/his Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Jul 2014 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 17,752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,018 Thanked 28,833 Times in 9,708 Posts Rep Power: 21474865	Food, water, shelter and clothes. But also friends and family. I try not too think too hard on things and keep it simple. Want and need are two different things for me. I will never get what i want but will almost certainly have what I need. __________________ Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning. Albert Einstein

01-25-2015, 01:03 PM	#5
clay Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches Posts: 13,136 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 97,020 Thanked 31,666 Times in 7,748 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	as stated.....here are my "needs"..... ~I need arts &crafts supplies and space ~~I need quiet time/space of my own daily....and am afforded that regularly. ~~I need my furbaby. She is a huge part of me and my world........for 10 years. ~~I need to view and enjoy the ocean regularly and seeing my dolphins! ~~I need social time with a select group of trusted friends. ~~I need social time for my most intimate of friends on this Planet! I love them each uniquely. ~~~I need my smudging rituals to cleanse my space and myself. ~~~I need my beloved crystals and healing stones, and my salt rock lamp. ~~I need my incense burns daily. ~~~I need, and do humbly appreciate my life, health, and wonderful partner all the time. ~~~I need to share my love for my very closest chosen family and friends often! __________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault

01-25-2015, 01:15 PM	#7
clay Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches Posts: 13,136 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 97,020 Thanked 31,666 Times in 7,748 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	you are so very welcome! __________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault

01-25-2015, 01:08 PM	#8
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I'm obviously communications poorly, I'll try again. For those not clear about what I mean and you think I'm confusing wants with needs.... Ok sorry. I'll try again but I'll make sure I put the picture here: (Edit to add: won't let me put an image in so I'm afraid you'll have to actually click it and look at it) This is what I linked to. This is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. I'm sayin' aside from the bottom layer oF listed physiological needs, HOW or WHAT things bring you the rest of your (as Maslow defines "needs") needs? How or what makes you content and happy, not just surviving. Like I'd never be content and happy living in a cement mixer even though it would keep the rain off me. I need to live where I have control over my own personal space or I get stressed out. Thank you For your patience. I've made a pigs ear of this thread, trying to articulate. But I hope I've done a better job now. Last edited by imperfect_cupcake; 01-25-2015 at 01:20 PM.

01-25-2015, 04:52 AM	#1
Shystonefem Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Shy for President Join Date: May 2014 Location: NH Posts: 1,105 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,475 Thanked 3,671 Times in 897 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Wow, great question. I need my animals and to always have animals around. I need to live in a place that is semi-rural yet close to water and a city... preferably a place on the water that is fairly close to a city. I need time to myself for meditation, etc. If I am coupled, I need that person to respect me and I would do the same. I need to read, write and learn. I need to live in a peaceful environment, without stress inside the home. I need to have close friends that I trust.

01-25-2015, 10:17 AM	#3
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Sorry. I meant like stated in the OP with Maslow's "hierarchy of needs". Taking out the bottom level. The link is up there if it's helpful for clarification on the word use of "need"? :/

01-31-2015, 01:14 PM	#10
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Good question. I don't know. I do know that when I didn't have the bottom row, other things like my gay rights, seemed fucking trivial. Only recently have I gotten the second row in place. Ish. And I know in planning for my future, the second row is my highest priority. I have love and belonging. Not romantic love, but I am most certainly loved and I do belong in my little group of friends. I probably have more self esteem than ever before in my life. But that comes with age, usually. And I suppose self actualisation... That's taking me a life time to understand. And will continue till I croak no doubt. So perhaps some things come in, in pieces, at different levels. But perhaps the general interest in developing them, the priority is most often given from lower to higher? I dunno. What do you think? Last edited by imperfect_cupcake; 01-31-2015 at 01:24 PM.