Family drama

Sassy · 03-18-2015, 05:40 AM

My family is from the south, and yes, it's some unspoken rule that we don't discuss anything that makes anyone uncomfortable, at all, ever.
If this were a new relationship I would at least better understand the tension. But my partner and I have been together over four years and are planning a wedding for later this year. It's as if the more SIL realizes this isn't a "phase" the more she distances herself and pulls her family away.
I've known her since she was 17, about 15 years now.
I called her on her birthday and she wouldn't pick up the phone. She texted later and accused my partner of picking out a present for one of her kids that would intentionally upset him. My Love would never do that. But I was the one who picked out all of the Christmas gifts for my family, especially the kids - I don't have kids of my own so it's the best part of Xmas to me, shopping for the nephews.
I know she was making an excuse for her behavior. I'm just struggling to accept this situation. I'm a fixer, and this won't be fixed. She's gone back to church and started quoting republicans and Duck Dynasty people in the past year.
I think that she blocked me on social media just after we announced the wedding plans.
Anyway. Thank you to everyone who has offered suggestions, and any other suggestions that come.
I suspect that all I can do is distance myself from the pain and continue to be a loving sister to my brother in hopes of not losing that relationship.

03-18-2015, 05:40 AM	#5
Sassy Member How Do You Identify?: Female Relationship Status: Together Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: In the sunshine Posts: 598 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 815 Thanked 1,929 Times in 460 Posts Rep Power: 19641164	Sad situation My family is from the south, and yes, it's some unspoken rule that we don't discuss anything that makes anyone uncomfortable, at all, ever. If this were a new relationship I would at least better understand the tension. But my partner and I have been together over four years and are planning a wedding for later this year. It's as if the more SIL realizes this isn't a "phase" the more she distances herself and pulls her family away. I've known her since she was 17, about 15 years now. I called her on her birthday and she wouldn't pick up the phone. She texted later and accused my partner of picking out a present for one of her kids that would intentionally upset him. My Love would never do that. But I was the one who picked out all of the Christmas gifts for my family, especially the kids - I don't have kids of my own so it's the best part of Xmas to me, shopping for the nephews. I know she was making an excuse for her behavior. I'm just struggling to accept this situation. I'm a fixer, and this won't be fixed. She's gone back to church and started quoting republicans and Duck Dynasty people in the past year. I think that she blocked me on social media just after we announced the wedding plans. Anyway. Thank you to everyone who has offered suggestions, and any other suggestions that come. I suspect that all I can do is distance myself from the pain and continue to be a loving sister to my brother in hopes of not losing that relationship.