The Loft: Butches and Femmes in their 40s, 50s and over.

[Girl Friday]

Originally Posted by OS Butch

<snip>
One of my mom's favorite things is triumph in silence. Sometimes just walking away is a statement in itself.

I like this. It's classy and it doesn't escalate things. It doesn't contribute to drama and it gives everyone a chance to breathe and rethink things.

Originally Posted by rustedrims

Same thing..
Ask your sister-in-law if she wants to take your x driver shopping.?.
Say she has tuesdays off and can probly be ready around 11-11:30 and she will probly buy you lunch..Just throw it back at her..Tell her your x driver might need some new under clothes to..That might get her shopping for boxers or tightey whites for a butch woman..

This shows a sense of humor if nothing else. Sometimes humor is the only way to deal with difficult people. Laughing usually has the effect of shutting them up or confusing them. Either way they've got something else to think about besides whatever they were being ridiculous about.

[OS Butch]

ever have one of those nights you just can't get to sleep?! guess I will go play words or look on Facebook....

[rustedrims]

Originally Posted by OS Butch

ever have one of those nights you just can't get to sleep?! guess I will go play words or look on Facebook....

yeah every night ..Monday through friday..I work at night but last night i did fall a sleep in my chair..a friend of mine cought me and said you were smiling..I told her i was some place pleasent and not here..Cant remember where i was..

[ladyhawkxx]

Age. Numbers. Only as young as you feel. I would have shrugged it off a couple of years ago as another "ism"... but today - just a few days past turning 52... I can't seem to shrug it off. There is a perpetual "crease" in my face that is unescapable. Every time I look in the mirror, there it is. No, I'm no longer the "young chippee" on the block. In fact, I crossed that bridge quite a long time ago. And I'm ok with that. But why does time have to be so Cruel? She is, you know. She is cruel - and seemingly, especially, to womyn. *sighs* *shakes head* I never considered a lift of any kind... until this morning....

[morningstar55]

Originally Posted by OS Butch

I guess I don't count And here I thought I was being supportive.

omg((((((((((((((((((OS)))))))))))))))) lol you always count... in more ways then one.. heh... i do have a ? ........ have you ever encountered someone quiestioning you.. on who you are?? the way you dress etc??? how do you handle it??

(((((ruth)))) wishing you a speedy recovery

rusty ...... when are we gonna meet up for a ice cream ??? err or a coffee?? lol
yes have had nights i couldnt sleep.....
im in canada cant play words till i get bk to state side... BUT tis truck stop here has FREE internet and computers... HA!!!
anyways .......... i gos to go ...
have a good day everyone.

[morningstar55]

Originally Posted by ladyhawkxx

Age. Numbers. Only as young as you feel. I would have shrugged it off a couple of years ago as another "ism"... but today - just a few days past turning 52... I can't seem to shrug it off. There is a perpetual "crease" in my face that is unescapable. Every time I look in the mirror, there it is. No, I'm no longer the "young chippee" on the block. In fact, I crossed that bridge quite a long time ago. And I'm ok with that. But why does time have to be so Cruel? She is, you know. She is cruel - and seemingly, especially, to womyn. *sighs* *shakes head* I never considered a lift of any kind... until this morning....

welcome to the Loft ... Lady ... NO canes or walkers required... lol
i just turnd 57... i try to think about my age number... just enjoying life and feel blessed to wake up each morning and enjoy yet another day on this planet.

[ladyhawkxx]

Originally Posted by morningstar55

welcome to the Loft ... Lady ... NO canes or walkers required... lol
i just turnd 57... i try to think about my age number... just enjoying life and feel blessed to wake up each morning and enjoy yet another day on this planet.

You are soooo very right, morningstar! (parks Hoveround)... *nodding head in agreement* and I DO feel blessed to wake up each morning.... Lord. I feel blessed to wake up at all... lolol!! And thanks for the welcome... I'll be spending a good bit of time here, I think!!!! BTW, did those stairs come with the place?

[morningstar55]

"The truest form of Love is how you behave toward someone;
Not just how you feel about them." ~ Steve Hall

[WingsOnFire]

Oh my goodness it has been ages since I posted in this thread.. How is everyone doing? Will have to catch up on whats happening with everyone...

It is cold in Oregon today... been in the 70s today its 54 but feels more like 40 lol.. I havent been around cold like this in a while so I guess I will get used to it..

[OS Butch]

Good evening folks! Been playing in the arcade again. I really need to stop doing that because it gets my brain to active and then I can't fall asleep. I hope everyone had a great weekend!

[ruthie14]

Originally Posted by OS Butch

Hey Ruthie, please keep us informed! I have the same problem with my elbow and just keep putting it off. Got too many things to do to take a few weeks off! Let me know if there is anything I can do, you are only about 3-4 hours away.

awwww Os.... aren't you sweet! I will let you know for sure.

Looks like work is going to give me a hard time. First they said it wouldn't be covered under workmans comp bc it was over a month since it happened. Dr. said I should get a letter from them stating that it was denied and why. After 2 weeks, today I insisted...NOW... after cortizone shots, drs visits and surgery is now scheduled... today they called workmans comp. Claim they said they weren't sure it was covered after a month (REALLY?? I'm 50 not stupid). So now the claim is in, and I have no idea what that means for my surgery. I will have to have another surgery on my wrist. This place has a history of cutting your hours and making things miserable for you if you don't play nice. I played nice and now this is what it is getting me! I need to get out of this job, but I can't before all this is resolved. Not sure what if anything i can do with this injury. I need to get if fixed, it happened here, but I can't afford it on my own. Insurance may not pay for it if workman's comp won't pay for it. Jeeze...

Deep, deep breath.........................................

[WingsOnFire]

Originally Posted by ruthie14

awwww Os.... aren't you sweet! I will let you know for sure.

Looks like work is going to give me a hard time. First they said it wouldn't be covered under workmans comp bc it was over a month since it happened. Dr. said I should get a letter from them stating that it was denied and why. After 2 weeks, today I insisted...NOW... after cortizone shots, drs visits and surgery is now scheduled... today they called workmans comp. Claim they said they weren't sure it was covered after a month (REALLY?? I'm 50 not stupid). So now the claim is in, and I have no idea what that means for my surgery. I will have to have another surgery on my wrist. This place has a history of cutting your hours and making things miserable for you if you don't play nice. I played nice and now this is what it is getting me! I need to get out of this job, but I can't before all this is resolved. Not sure what if anything i can do with this injury. I need to get if fixed, it happened here, but I can't afford it on my own. Insurance may not pay for it if workman's comp won't pay for it. Jeeze...

Deep, deep breath.........................................

I believe your insurance has to pay for it if your company deems it not work related.. although I know they like to screw you around forever.. I hate that!! I know companies that have paid claims with no issue at all.. how sad for those who have to deal with the crap you are dealing with.. Hugs...

Sending good vibes that it is covered and they dont treat you badly because of it...

[OS Butch]

Good evening I am home early and going to play in the arcade...Hopefully since it is early, it won't keep up up late

[LadyRieinAL]

Originally Posted by ladyhawkxx

Age. Numbers. Only as young as you feel. I would have shrugged it off a couple of years ago as another "ism"... but today - just a few days past turning 52... I can't seem to shrug it off. There is a perpetual "crease" in my face that is unescapable. Every time I look in the mirror, there it is. No, I'm no longer the "young chippee" on the block. In fact, I crossed that bridge quite a long time ago. And I'm ok with that. But why does time have to be so Cruel? She is, you know. She is cruel - and seemingly, especially, to womyn. *sighs* *shakes head* I never considered a lift of any kind... until this morning....

Ladyhawk, I'm 57 - and I have had issues, as I age, with the person I have seen when I look in the mirror. How did those lines get there?
And the other day I found myself talking to my four year old granddaughter , Nina, why do you have lines on your face and hands......Well Willow, Ninna has lived a very long time, and she has seen and been many places, and these lines tell a story about all those places Nina has been. Nina is very proud of what she has learned in all the places that she has been. And she said, Nina, when I get old will I have those many lines, and I said, yes, sweet one you will. And she said, I hope I don't get as old as you. LOL (out of the mouths of babes) I didn't have the heart to tell her she really doesn't have a choice. LOL
And LadyHawk, I hope the next person that is invited to co-create life with me, understands it took some doing for the lines to appear and they tell a magnificent journey for anyone who wants to share life line stories.

[rustedrims]

Very well said..That little girl sounds like a blast to be around..
Take good care of her..

[starrynitesfemme]

Hi there, I'm happy to see this space, at 43, i'm still trying to sort out being this age... I wrote this, and thought perhaps I would share:

Growing older is an odd thing, to feel 15.. but in this 43 year old body.. to be growing older at all, considering my history is.. a miracle. A miracle I say many prayerful thanks for each day, as much as I may grumble and fuss about the aches and pains. But growing older gives us something else, this powerful space of.. THIS is who I am, take it or leave it, like it, love it.. or walk away. I truly love growing into that space, feeling myself stretch and grow, knowing myself better every single day. There are very few things I can say with confidence about myself, but one very important one I can: I love well. I love wholly, unconditionally, without boundaries and with no apologies. I find some folks are very uncomfortable in that space, but now, older, perhaps wiser, I no longer apologize for it or me in any fashion. I am grateful to be here, now, my feet on the earth, my hands doing their very best to type the words my mind feeds them and love in my heart. I am grateful for each connection, each moment, each breath.. and each step, because the next step, is all I have to worry about.

I hope each of you has a wonderful eve.. ♥

[rustedrims]

Verrry well said..
I like it..All of it..

[Viola]

Hi Morningstar55,

I don't understand your sister thinking for others. Does anyone ever think for your sister, what does your sister do when others think for her...

Why do people do that think for others, like as they know and so push their thinking - thinking all must think like them... Why do they do that?

I know I have flaws where I need to work on myself and if anyone brings it to my attention what I'm doing that's hurting others or offending, I want to change the way how I treat others.

So my next question is: if people don't want to hear how they're offending so then they can take a closer look at themselves to change, why is it that they don't want to know in order to change?

For me, I want to be pleasant to be around and I'd found there's times I'm not pleasant at all, and so I figure it out after wards what am I doing that's make me not be enjoyable to be around, and I seek to learn at least one thing so I can try something different in order to change.

But then again, I've been told I work so hard on myself and why is that., and also I've been told I'm so hard on my self., so maybe there's needs to be balance in this too...

Your sister so busy thinking for others how others must think, that would drive me crazy to be around her, cause there's no freedom of thought and no freedom to be one self...

However your sister puzzles me too., as is it her pride, but what is pride then that she has?

Why can't she learn, if she doesn't understand, can't there be a way where she can learn as she accepts, cause maybe she's confused, but a person can be confused while accepting, I mean, there's times I'm confused, and there's even times I'm confused about myself...

So the thought of completely understanding everything, no that I can't even do all the time, sometimes I don't understand however I can accept the person and learn a new perspective through the persons eyes...

I am only me and see only through my eyes, oh what a gift when I can see through other eyes as I learn through their teaching me their perspective.

Originally Posted by morningstar55

Ok i need a lil vent... and maybe some helpful advice....... seems lately, few times i been around my sister in law.. she has brought up my x co drives name and make.comments nd quesa, why he looks and seems to b like a man... ..i say.. he ah was born that way. Then she wil try 2 disbute that , then i get defensive , i then just leave the room. Ya knw , even though it did not work out driving with my co driver nd i.. i Will, defend his gender and rights.

[AtLast]

OK, i like this thread, but have always been kind of put off by the title. The "over" bothers me. Why not just call it the "elders?" LOL, yes, I am an over and have to say that my 60's are most certainly of the finest vintage.... Yes, I might be being too sensitive, or politically correct. So, what do others that are 60 plus, think?

[OS Butch]

Originally Posted by AtLast

OK, i like this thread, but have always been kind of put off by the title. The "over" bothers me. Why not just call it the "elders?" LOL, yes, I am an over and have to say that my 60's are most certainly of the finest vintage.... Yes, I might be being too sensitive, or politically correct. So, what do others that are 60 plus, think?

Ummmm, I am not 60 plus, so I guess I will save my 2 cents.