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12-04-2016, 01:08 AM
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#641 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
Transguy Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
single  Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Central West Coast of Florida
Posts: 5,204
Thanks: 34,866
Thanked 17,784 Times in 3,940 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857   |
What did the mayonnaise say when someone opened the refrigerator door.
Close the door I am dressing! Why did Mozart kill his chicken? Because it kept saying "Bach, bach, bach. Why does a seagull fly over the sea? Because if it flew over the bay it would be called a bagel!
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“You’re so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that widened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this.”
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12-04-2016, 12:02 PM
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#642 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femm Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
**loved by many** 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Closer to the waves
Posts: 15,379
Thanks: 29,115
Thanked 40,946 Times in 10,731 Posts
Rep Power: 21474864 |
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
Nothing it was on the house!
__________________
 kissesA kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back. |
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12-05-2016, 10:40 PM
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#643 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femm Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
**loved by many**
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Closer to the waves
Posts: 15,379
Thanks: 29,115
Thanked 40,946 Times in 10,731 Posts
Rep Power: 21474864 |
What do you call an old snowman?
Water..lol
__________________
kissesA kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back. |
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12-06-2016, 10:45 AM
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#644 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch dominant lesbian Preferred Pronoun?:
She, Baby Boi Relationship Status:
She is my sunrise and sunset. 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: North Shore Chicago
Posts: 1,569
Thanks: 11,033
Thanked 11,067 Times in 1,495 Posts
Rep Power: 21474848 |
I was wondering why that football was getting larger and larger....
and then BAM! It hit me.
__________________
* * *Joy and Sorrow are Inseparable |
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12-06-2016, 11:13 AM
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#645 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
submissive queer stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
she, her 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 3,827
Thanks: 3,752
Thanked 3,845 Times in 856 Posts
Rep Power: 21474851  |
knock knock anyone?
Knock Knock
Who's there? Wayne Wayne who? Wayne in a manger...! Knock Knock Who's there? Holly Holly who? Holly-days are here again! Knock Knock. Who's there? Butch, Jimmy and Joe. Butch, Jimmy, and Joe Who? Butch your arms around me, Jimmy a kiss, and let's Joe. Knock Knock Who's There? Britney Spears! Britney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's There? Oops I did it again Knock Knock Who's There? Hanna Hanna who? Hanna partridge in a pear tree! Knock Knock Who's there? Olive Olive who? Olive you!
__________________
How do you define courage? Is it the absence of fear? You might think, under the weight of your fears, "I am not courageous." But maybe you have the wrong perspective. Courage can be measured in many ways, and is not the absence or denial of fear, but the willingness to act vulnerably. When you're faced with the unknown and then you stand on the edge of risk, courage brings you to the point where you are able to take flight, though you might be unsure of your wings. |
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01-02-2017, 10:55 AM
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#646 |
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Superlative Soul Sister
How Do You Identify?:
Lesbian stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, her Relationship Status:
Moving in a single file 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Cottage of Content
Posts: 13,580
Thanks: 41,436
Thanked 34,696 Times in 8,932 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861 |
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road."
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01-02-2017, 11:17 AM
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#647 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
G-d made Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2,588
Thanks: 711
Thanked 402 Times in 254 Posts
Rep Power: 7194440 |
Four little birds got together one winter to discuss their flight plans
First little bird says "My instincts tell me to go north" Second little bird says "My instincts tell me to go south" Third little bird says" My instincts tell me to go west" Fourth little bird says "my end stinks" 
__________________
 
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02-23-2017, 02:15 PM
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#648 |
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Superlative Soul Sister
How Do You Identify?:
Lesbian stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, her Relationship Status:
Moving in a single file
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Cottage of Content
Posts: 13,580
Thanks: 41,436
Thanked 34,696 Times in 8,932 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861 |
A new study has found that women who carry extra weight live longer than than the men who mention it.
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03-08-2017, 06:36 PM
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#649 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Butch dominant lesbian Preferred Pronoun?:
She, Baby Boi Relationship Status:
She is my sunrise and sunset.
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: North Shore Chicago
Posts: 1,569
Thanks: 11,033
Thanked 11,067 Times in 1,495 Posts
Rep Power: 21474848 |
C, Eb and G walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, no minors".
A plateau is the highest form of flattery. What's orange and sounds like a carrot? A parrot. "I stand corrected." said the man in his orthopedic shoes.
__________________
* * *Joy and Sorrow are Inseparable |
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03-14-2017, 09:28 AM
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#650 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
femme woman - Hello Daddy, hello mom. I'm your ch-ch-ch cherry bomb! Preferred Pronoun?:
female/she/her Relationship Status:
Single by choice 
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: the earth
Posts: 433
Thanks: 127
Thanked 636 Times in 234 Posts
Rep Power: 5404777 |
What did one firefly say to the other?
You glow girl!
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03-17-2017, 05:54 AM
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#651 |
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Superlative Soul Sister
How Do You Identify?:
Lesbian stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, her Relationship Status:
Moving in a single file
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Cottage of Content
Posts: 13,580
Thanks: 41,436
Thanked 34,696 Times in 8,932 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861 |
What do you call an Irishman sitting on a couch? "Paddy O'Furniture"
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03-17-2017, 10:11 PM
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#652 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femm Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
**loved by many**
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Closer to the waves
Posts: 15,379
Thanks: 29,115
Thanked 40,946 Times in 10,731 Posts
Rep Power: 21474864 |
why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?
Because they're always a little short.🍀🍀🍀
__________________
kissesA kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back. |
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03-17-2017, 10:12 PM
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#653 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femm Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
**loved by many**
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Closer to the waves
Posts: 15,379
Thanks: 29,115
Thanked 40,946 Times in 10,731 Posts
Rep Power: 21474864 |
How can you tell if an Irishwoman is having fun?
She is Dublin over with laughter!
__________________
kissesA kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back. |
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04-14-2017, 09:03 AM
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#654 |
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Superlative Soul Sister
How Do You Identify?:
Lesbian stone femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, her Relationship Status:
Moving in a single file
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Cottage of Content
Posts: 13,580
Thanks: 41,436
Thanked 34,696 Times in 8,932 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861 |
Where does the Easter Bunny get his eggs?
From eggplants. 
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04-16-2017, 07:25 AM
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#655 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Here
Posts: 1,526
Thanks: 6,112
Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850 |
How does the Easter Bunny stay healthy?
He eggercises! Why did the Easter Egg hide? He was a little chicken! Why did the Easter Bunny cross the road? It was the chicken's day off! Why did the Easter Bunny go see a therapist? Because he was a basketcase! |
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04-16-2017, 11:19 AM
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#656 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme-ish, tomboy lesbian Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
Together a really long time 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: In my mind? On a tropical island
Posts: 4,860
Thanks: 13,584
Thanked 12,876 Times in 3,079 Posts
Rep Power: 21474850 |
Where do pencils go on vacation?
Pennsylvania!!!
__________________
 
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05-02-2017, 09:10 PM
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#657 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, please. Relationship Status:
Attached to my granddaughter and chosen family. Join Date: May 2010
Location: Northwest of Mt Hood ツ
Posts: 16,069
Thanks: 30,044
Thanked 33,521 Times in 10,647 Posts
Rep Power: 21474868 |
"What goes around the world, but stays in a corner?
A postage stamp," ~ Max, Jutta's son. (In, All The Light We Cannot See.pp. 509: Doerr, A. 2014, Simon & Schuster, NY, NY).
__________________
“You can love a person dear to you with a human love, but an enemy can only be loved with divine love,”
— Leo Tolstoy (Author of Anna Karenina).   |
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06-02-2017, 03:40 PM
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#658 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, please. Relationship Status:
Attached to my granddaughter and chosen family. Join Date: May 2010
Location: Northwest of Mt Hood ツ
Posts: 16,069
Thanks: 30,044
Thanked 33,521 Times in 10,647 Posts
Rep Power: 21474868 |
corny, yet cute. :)
__________________
“You can love a person dear to you with a human love, but an enemy can only be loved with divine love,”
— Leo Tolstoy (Author of Anna Karenina). |
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06-02-2017, 04:57 PM
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#659 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?:
mermaid, *very* lucky babygirl Relationship Status:
Saltwater mermaid ♡ 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,209
Thanks: 5,192
Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts
Rep Power: 21474854 |
I found out I was colorblind today.
It was totally out of the purple.
__________________
Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence 
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06-02-2017, 05:17 PM
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#660 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She, please. Relationship Status:
Attached to my granddaughter and chosen family. Join Date: May 2010
Location: Northwest of Mt Hood ツ
Posts: 16,069
Thanks: 30,044
Thanked 33,521 Times in 10,647 Posts
Rep Power: 21474868 |
Quote:
__________________
“You can love a person dear to you with a human love, but an enemy can only be loved with divine love,”
— Leo Tolstoy (Author of Anna Karenina). |
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