The Limp-Wristed Hand Gesture

Nat · 01-09-2012, 08:59 PM

Today at dinner, my mom was describing my grandfather to my partner. While talking about his love of cooking, she said, "because he's a little, you know..." and did the limp-wristed hand gesture suggesting he was gay/prissy.

My reaction was to say, "Mom, don't make that gesture! You're talking to two lesbians." She blew it off, my partner said she wasn't offended, and I pretty much forgot about it.

Until my mom cornered me when we got home, brought it up again and acted hurt that I would suggest she was in some way anti-gay. So now she's sulking and I'm stressed that my mom's upset with me, and I'm also thinking about this gesture.

I don't see people making this gesture much anymore. In high school, junior high, maybe elementary school - this was a gesture that I saw a lot and also performed my fair share of. It never occurred to me back then that it was offensive. Because I sucked.

But now it seems pretty offensive to me.

I'm making a poll for this thread. Basically I thought it might be something worth discussing. It's something I hadn't thought about in years until I saw my mom do it today.

View Poll Results: The limp-wristed hand gesture
is offensive and demeaning to gay people	21	35.00%
is harmless	9	15.00%
is funny	1	1.67%
is something I have done, but no longer do	9	15.00%
is something I have done and still do	0	0%
is something I see often	2	3.33%
is something I haven't seen in the last decade	23	38.33%
is something I sometimes see	13	21.67%
makes me feel bad	5	8.33%
is worth speaking up against	16	26.67%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 60. You may not vote on this poll

01-09-2012, 08:59 PM	#1
Nat Senior Member How Do You Identify?: bigender (DID System) Preferred Pronoun?: he/him or alter-specific Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Central TX Posts: 3,537 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,047 Thanked 13,968 Times in 2,589 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	The Limp-Wristed Hand Gesture Today at dinner, my mom was describing my grandfather to my partner. While talking about his love of cooking, she said, "because he's a little, you know..." and did the limp-wristed hand gesture suggesting he was gay/prissy. My reaction was to say, "Mom, don't make that gesture! You're talking to two lesbians." She blew it off, my partner said she wasn't offended, and I pretty much forgot about it. Until my mom cornered me when we got home, brought it up again and acted hurt that I would suggest she was in some way anti-gay. So now she's sulking and I'm stressed that my mom's upset with me, and I'm also thinking about this gesture. I don't see people making this gesture much anymore. In high school, junior high, maybe elementary school - this was a gesture that I saw a lot and also performed my fair share of. It never occurred to me back then that it was offensive. Because I sucked. But now it seems pretty offensive to me. I'm making a poll for this thread. Basically I thought it might be something worth discussing. It's something I hadn't thought about in years until I saw my mom do it today. __________________ I'm a fountain of blood. In the shape of a girl. - Bjork What is to give light must endure burning. -Viktor Frankl