Dating "non single" people

adorable · 12-27-2010, 04:44 AM

OMG OMG!!!!!

Emotional unavailabilty is my FAVORITE thing in the whole world. It MUST be!!!!! No matter what I do, in a room full of 10,000 emotionally available people and ONE, just ONE person with either another relationship going, unresolved mama issues or just a general inability to connect in a meaningful human level - I won't just want to date them - I will want to MARRY THEM!

Why? This is a question I have asked myself over and over and over...It's kind of like eating Big Mac's. Sure they're bad for you, but they are oh so tasty!!! And just one nibble isn't going to hurt! Except that it does. And in relationships with unavailable people, it hurts a lot.

One of the things that I realized about me was that, in chosing people who weren't available, I saved myself from having to truly connect or commit at a meaningful level. Instead I could stay in that "Oh, I will get them to love me!" phase for eternity. A sick part of me enjoys that game.

So there are some relationships that I have learned to stop before they start. Right off the bat, because I have been down these roads before and they are some of the easier red flags to spot...if they are currently involved in a relationship - if they are still hung up on a relationship that is supposed to be over - if they have a history of cheating or abuse - if they have ever been to prison - if they are currently using any form of cocaine - if they are prescribed psychiatric medication and don't take it....
(I ask the questions and listen to the answers. I don't pretend that I am the exception anymore.) I just won't go there now. I have been there, didn't like it and have no desire to return. Life is too short.

12-27-2010, 04:44 AM	#17
adorable Member How Do You Identify?: Sarcastically Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Home of the Yankee's Posts: 752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,708 Thanked 2,645 Times in 590 Posts Rep Power: 12725118	OMG OMG!!!!! Emotional unavailabilty is my FAVORITE thing in the whole world. It MUST be!!!!! No matter what I do, in a room full of 10,000 emotionally available people and ONE, just ONE person with either another relationship going, unresolved mama issues or just a general inability to connect in a meaningful human level - I won't just want to date them - I will want to MARRY THEM! Why? This is a question I have asked myself over and over and over...It's kind of like eating Big Mac's. Sure they're bad for you, but they are oh so tasty!!! And just one nibble isn't going to hurt! Except that it does. And in relationships with unavailable people, it hurts a lot. One of the things that I realized about me was that, in chosing people who weren't available, I saved myself from having to truly connect or commit at a meaningful level. Instead I could stay in that "Oh, I will get them to love me!" phase for eternity. A sick part of me enjoys that game. So there are some relationships that I have learned to stop before they start. Right off the bat, because I have been down these roads before and they are some of the easier red flags to spot...if they are currently involved in a relationship - if they are still hung up on a relationship that is supposed to be over - if they have a history of cheating or abuse - if they have ever been to prison - if they are currently using any form of cocaine - if they are prescribed psychiatric medication and don't take it.... (I ask the questions and listen to the answers. I don't pretend that I am the exception anymore.) I just won't go there now. I have been there, didn't like it and have no desire to return. Life is too short.