PTSD and Trauma recovery

Semantics · 01-20-2010, 03:39 PM

I was diagnosed with PTSD in 1994, when I was seventeen years old.

My worst symptoms are hypervigilance, nightmares, insomnia, anxiety, and emotional avoidance.
I also have survivor guilt, although that one is tricky because the person I survived was also the perpetrator of the trauma. Once I got over the initial relief that he could no longer hurt me, the guilt over the fact that I should have somehow prevented his death set in. It's amazing to realize how many different things can be true at one time.

I've spent a lot of time feeling embarrassed about it and I'm done with that now. I've adapted, for the most part, and I have decent coping skills.

I can't date, though. I know I've joked with some of you about why I don't date, but the real reason is I just can't function in a relationship.

Yet. I still have hope for someday I'm just not there yet.

01-20-2010, 03:39 PM	#9
Semantics Senior Member How Do You Identify?: malapropist Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: New England Posts: 2,169 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,367 Thanked 3,963 Times in 1,201 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I was diagnosed with PTSD in 1994, when I was seventeen years old. My worst symptoms are hypervigilance, nightmares, insomnia, anxiety, and emotional avoidance. I also have survivor guilt, although that one is tricky because the person I survived was also the perpetrator of the trauma. Once I got over the initial relief that he could no longer hurt me, the guilt over the fact that I should have somehow prevented his death set in. It's amazing to realize how many different things can be true at one time. I've spent a lot of time feeling embarrassed about it and I'm done with that now. I've adapted, for the most part, and I have decent coping skills. I can't date, though. I know I've joked with some of you about why I don't date, but the real reason is I just can't function in a relationship. Yet. I still have hope for someday I'm just not there yet.