Stone Femme?

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by cinderella

meaning to read every post before I commented - but, being the ol' crotechy bitch that I am, I didn't have the patience nor motivation - I am so jaded, I believe I've heard it all before.

Let me back up a bit...for years, I was a Lesbian - I didn't know any better, so that's what I always called myself. I was involved in sexually 'reciprocal' relationships. And by 'reciprocal' I mean - you do me, I do you. Well, that never sat well with me, and I'll tell you why. I was a lousy 'lesbian' - according to what the 'ideal' sort of 'lesbian' was supposed to be - reciprocal 'everything'. Well, I just couldn't go there. I was accused of being 'straight' because I - too put it bluntly - didn't enjoy/like going down on a woman - nor a man, for that mattter (I was 'straight' for the first 20 years of my life). I just did not like it, could not stomach it, didn't want to, etc. - I think you get the picture.

To me, being 'stone' is not touching/feeling up a butch - not that I would want to - I don't. Never mind, 'going down'! That to me - and I am only speaking for myself - is unspeakable! It is nothing I would ever want to do. So, anyone I partner with, would have to be stone in that way.

Ok, enough said about my preferences & personal interpretation of 'stone femme'...carry on.

I appreciate your thoughts and whatever you just don't care to do certainly is a boundary you need to have respected.

I feel like you are making some generalizations about lesbian sex and stereotyping us. I certainly don't have a predetermined and narrow interpretation of what lesians always do. I haven't stuck to one and only one way of enjoying sex through all my years of lesbianism. Sex is fluid and can evolve. Identifying as a butch woman has not changed this at all for me.

Absolutely, sexual boundaries need to be respected. Stereotyping segments of the entire queer spectrum based upon what you individually have experienced and putting it into negative language (that is how this feels to me) is troublesome. As troublesome as when I see someone stereotyping or making negative judgements of a stone person. I am very careful as a non-stone individual to not make statements that could offend those that are stone and not generalize about stone sexuality.