Reclaiming Lesbian Pride

[dreadgeek]

June:

When I was little--probably 12 or around there--I was baking biscuits with my grandmother and I asked her if she hated white people. She was born in 1903 and lived her whole life in the same town in Louisiana (Ruston). If anyone had a reason to hate white people, it was Mama Gus. She looked at me, sat me down and gave me this which, to this day, forms the core of my ethics:

"Baby, we can't hate them back. See, maybe the Klansman just don't know any better. He might not know that black people are also children of God. But you and I know what it's like to be hated. Now, if you do evil out of ignorance, God will forgive that because only He knows everything. But if you do evil because you have seen it, you know it is evil and you choose to do it anyway, that makes you worse than any Klansman. It means you wanted to be evil, even though you know that it hurts real people."

Every time I feel tempted or seduced by hatred--and hating others IS seductive, looking down on others is the easiest mental trick in the world--I remember her words. When I think of Michelle Bachmann, who I have no doubt would happily sign laws that would all but outlaw us, I remember my grandmother's words. I can think her a fool, I can certainly point out that the woman knows slightly more American history than my dog only because my dog can't read, I will absolutely rush to the barricades to defend my nation against the theocracy she wishes to bring but I cannot *hate* her. Oppose, yes. Hate? No.

Cheers
Aj

Originally Posted by June

On a personal note:

It is truly heartbreaking for me that in a thread about Lesbian Pride that a Butch Lesbian has to essentially make a case for herself to be included in the "Loving Circle of Sappho".

In all of our personal narratives, I am sure we can point to many, many people of all kinds who have usurped, oppressed and tread unpleasantly upon our backs in order to lift themselves up.

When we, as a microcosm community allow a few people to do this in order to exert their "Pride" and/or ownership of something, in this case, Lesbian, it does not make us stronger, it divides and others us into factions.

It is my opinion that people who do this are no better, and possibly worse than the likes of Michelle Bachmann, et al. The people who see us as less than human and actively seek to oppress us further based solely upon who we love.

My personal narrative contains experiences that prove to me that it is when I am seen for all the other things I am, a mother, great employee, volunteer, friend, that who I sleep with becomes less important, than who I am as a whole.

It is perplexing to me when "we" do not allow this same courtesy to others that we meet, but instead choose to paint all with the same brush based on opinions formed previously. This is how, even now, in 2011, Racism, Sexism, Misogyny, Sizism, Classism and any other ism you can think of is still running rampant.

Remaining silent = Complicity and approval.

As far as I know, save for personal ones, there is no universal litmus test for Lesbian, and yet some of us act as though there is and actively seek to impose it on others in order to exclude and silence.

--June