Relationships - What things do you want & need?

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by VintageFemme

Lately it seems those that I'm dating and/or meeting are looking more for a girl friend than a girlfriend. It seems they are more interested in hanging out and having someone to talk to, etc. And while that's all fine and well, it's absolutely not what I need in a relationship. Maybe it's my age group. I dunno. I so hope not. I need a good old fashioned butch/femme full on relationship that includes passion and excitement as well as companionship and comfort. Goddess, I hope I'm just in some kind of bad juju place and this is not the way it is or is going to be in my future. I couldn't bear that.

As for 'the list' - someone who is...

• creative
• independent
• sexual
• extremely witty
• charming/old fashioned
• grounded with spontaneous tendencies

I need a lot of attention when I need it and then a lot of space when I need that too. I'm so freaking hard to handle, it's insane so I need a lot of patience and sticktoitnivness. Yeah, that's what I need in a relationship, sticktoitniveness.

Vintage, we may want completely different things but I often feel like I am the only person in butch-femme land who wants what I do. Mostly I get people who want what I feel are rigid formulaic formal and stiff awkward (for me) dates that don't feel that treat me like an individual girl. Just a cut out gender representative to shovel fill in the blank formula romance on. And I feel invisible and sad rather than romanced.

It feel pretty much like I'm the only one that feels this way too.

I think it's a human condition to feel that way.