I am... and I prefer the term...

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by Toughy

I think that depends on what society/culture you were born to even within the US.

I come from the desert southwest (southeast new mexico). Women wore pants, worked along side men on the farm/ranch. The rule of thumb is: 'the butcher she looks, the more likely she is straight'. The expectation from farm/ranch culture was that women could and should be able to do what men did. And men should be able to do what women did. I was not raised with 'women's roles' and 'men's roles'. I was in for a hella shock when I went to college and ran into this other idea about women.

That is not to say I did not understand I was different. I knew I was not like other girls/women..........even the butch looking ones. I was entirely insecure in the girl-boy stuff. My first crushes were on girls even tho I could not articulate that crush. But I did know it was different and I was different.

So it's a mixed bag for me............but don't call me cis-sexed and/or cis-gendered.

I think the really confusing part is how 'gender' and 'sex' are interchangeable except when they are not.

Yes- very confusing!


I had a little bit of what you describe when I lived as a teen in a "mountain town"- Yet, felt like you did. I was not the same kind of butch as these other women due to my sexuality, not my gender presentation.

This is just not a simple subject area. Sometimes I wonder why we think it can be wrapped-up into a one size fits all paradigm. Both gender & sexuality are elastic and fluid to me and defy simplicity.