Femme Led Relationships and Trans/Butch/Femme Bottoms

[Sachita]

Originally Posted by June

In this Femme led relationship, I am very aware that I must earn the right to be in charge of the things that are important to me, and for us as a couple. I have not always been good at negotiating rather than just assuming and taking without giving as much back to her -- But it is a journey and a process to get both what you want and need out of any relationship, and I look at it very much as a Free Will deal.

When she goes out to the car for the ninth time to get something, or brings me something to drink or does any of the dozens of things I ask her to, it has to be because she is getting something out of it. Delicious meals, a pretty house, a nice garden, a tidy non-chaotic environment, reciprocal love, the way I look at her from across the room that lets her know even after all this time, she's still the one.

Awwwwww.

well said June!

when people talk about exchange of power I wonder if they realize the full extent of it or how complex it can become. Wanton boi is very comfortable being submissive, even turned on by it but I also reinforce and nurture that. Although hy is the one fetching things, cleaning, waiting on my hand and foot, I often show hym my appreciation. I am providing a wonderful home, good healthy food and an environment for hym to grow. There's a big price to be with me but I also offer a lot. Hy will tell you that hy feels safe, loved and cherished. Even as friends I give this to hym.

Maybe its just my perception but I don't see butch needs being a priority. Feminine energy trumps masculine in my world. A seductive and willful femme knows exactly how to get what she wants. She doesn't need to do this with force. Women are in control in so many ways even if she's on her knees. It's a fact.

GT I do know what your saying and it may appear that way but I also know, having been in BF culture many many moons, that plenty of femmes rule the roost so to speak. In fact I think femme relationships are pretty common.

As an spiritually evolved woman I have many aspects to me. This includes a sexually passive slut, goddess bitch diva, little girl, brat, seductress, mommy and more. They can surface at any time and demand their space. I allow them to express themselves and nurture my relationships to enjoy them. I don't need to be Mistress/Goddess/alpha all the time, although it does encompass the base essence of me and always present to some degree.