A straight girl enters the queer world...

[Quintease]

Originally Posted by DeviantDaddy

she did make it perfectly clear that, were I to decide to transition, she would not remain by my side as my partner because she was a femme, lesbian.

I have always been conscious of the fact that to some, partnering with a transman can lead to some very deep soul searching for whatever reason. Their identity may come into question and I wouldn't like to downplay that in any way.

I think it's different when someone you already love begins to transition. It's like they're taking the person you know and love away and replacing them with someone else.

As for my ID I went through a lot of soul searching, but in the end realised I'd fallen for a person, not a gender. Had anyone told me that by 2012 I would have married a man, I would have rolled my eyes and assumed they were being homophobic. As it was, I may have married a man, but that didn't change my sexual identity at all.

[Melissa]

Originally Posted by Quintease

I think it's different when someone you already love begins to transition. It's like they're taking the person you know and love away and replacing them with someone else.

As for my ID I went through a lot of soul searching, but in the end realised I'd fallen for a person, not a gender. Had anyone told me that by 2012 I would have married a man, I would have rolled my eyes and assumed they were being homophobic. As it was, I may have married a man, but that didn't change my sexual identity at all.

Great point Quintease. The same happened to me. I Have identified as a lesbian for over 20 years but am now married to Rufusboi who transitioned nearly two years ago. I realized quickly though that he wasn't having a personality transition and that gender and pronouns doesn't change how I feel either about him or myself or how I identify. Julie mentioned in an earlier post that it is all about communication. It doesn't matter if you have been with someone for 2 weeks or 10 years you have to talk, share fears, ask questions and figure it out together.

Melissa