For the Love of Intentions!!

[Novelafemme]

Originally Posted by thedivahrrrself

I think much of this behavior has to do with people not being willing to look at another person's perspective and understand it. You see through your own glass, and you can't take them off and look through someone else's for a moment.

Take the word "Southern" for example. For me, this word conjures memories of my grandparents, the patchwork quilt of land going by as we drove to them, summers in Georgia spent picking fresh blackberries and making them into pies, stuffing myself with cornbread and delicious food, generous hospitality and impeccable manners. For others, this conjures up memories of a time when the military had to be present just to let a little black girl walk into school. Or how a group of evil parents in Mississippi decided to hold a completely separate prom just so the lesbian wouldn't be invited. One is not right or wrong, they are all true, just a matter of individual perspective. But I have seen this word picked apart in so many threads, like we can all just assume it has only one meaning.

I myself have not experienced the behavior described above, that I can recall, but I am also pretty good at defending my words and thoughts. I can certainly remember times where I felt someone who maybe just wasn't very good with words appeared to be pummeled into submission (so to speak), where even though I may not have agreed with them, I felt sorry for them. I have no qualms calling out racism, homophobia, etc. but I try to do so in a way that will engage the offender and help them come to some rational conclusion on their own, rather than trying to force my own way of thinking. But I guess I put a lot more faith in the Socratic method than the soapbox.

This really resonates with me. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Diva. I had to re-read it a couple of times in order to put my finger on something that at first puzzled me. That being the portion I high lighted in blue.

Sometimes it's as if I feel the need to draw a very permanent line in the sand, one that I either stand on one side of or the other (no straddling allowed) and I end up losing sight of precisely what Diva stated. Neither is right or wrong, yet both are true to the individual.

Perhaps what it boils down to for many of us is trigger issues. I know certain topics absolutely push my buttons faster and stronger than others, and I can jump down someone's throat quicker than the time it would take to put a well thought-out, cohesive statement together.

I dare say that if we don't give this issue some careful attention, it could very well be the straw that breaks the camel's back.