Same Sex Marriage and Divorce

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by Soon

Regarding divorce and financial settlements due to adultery.

In many regions, infidelity has no bearing on the settlement. For example, in Ontario, adultery can be grounds for a divorce (or a one year separation or mental/physical cruelty); however, it will have absolutely no effect on the Court's decision regarding division of property or the affording of support. I know this is true in the USA as well with many States (not all for example NY is one where adultery can be taken into consideration I think) being 'no fault' divorce. Basically, a person can be cheating for an entire marriage and this will have no bearing on the court's division of assets between the couple or the awarding of support. In a judgement of alimony or support, courts take other factors into consideration including length of marriage, ability of one party to find work, lifestyle during the marriage etc. but adultery cannot be used to a a means to determine the amount granted.

I think the UK is different in this regard where adultery may afford the injured party more of a settlement.

I guess I was thinking more in regards to my own situation and those of a fair many I know which is deemed abandonment. In those cases the person who abandons someone, it's quite often deemed they are financially responsible for the person they abandoned to at least some degree.

I have no idea about the US, but in BC and in the UK, I do know that is the case. I won't be living in the US so it's not something I'll have to worry about.

The thing is, when marriage wasn't legal there was far less worry about how ones behaviour impacted their lives in terms of legal responsibility. Frankly, I am happy that legal marriage makes people think about the type commitment people are making.

Want an out? In BC don't live together for more than two years, don't file taxes together, and don't get married.

If the person you are with refuses to do any of those things and you want a commitment, it's likely you won't be getting one.

[MsTinkerbelly]

For *me*, marriage was a way for my relationship to be protected legally...but for *me*, marriage, the piece of paper and the commitment in front of my friends/family/higher power, changed EVERYTHING.

I felt different about my relationship, I feel different about the amount of myself I will give to make it all work. There is no longer the ability to just walk away without repercussions, there is a vow to stick it out and give it your all, even when you don't want to anymore.

Everything changes...things get more real...things get uglier...things improve...things evolve. If you're really lucky, your relationship becomes a living and breathing thing that brings you comfort and great joy.