Unconditional Love... is it really unconditional?

chefhottie25 · 05-14-2010, 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

I believe in uncondition love. I think babies and animals are automatically inclined to love unconditionally because they are closer to the other side. For adults it is harder to achieve.

I believe that unconditional love is unlimited and absolute. Think of the Amish people who chose to forgive the man who shot and killed the children in the one room school house. That is the kind of love that I am talking about.

I am with you Andrew. I have recently realized that a dear friend of mine loves me unconditionally. She loved me when I was not able to stay clean from heroin and cocaine. I did some pretty horrible things. Now that I am in recovery, I have recognized that she has always found me loveable. I recently thanked her for loving me unconditionally...and she said it wasn't unconditional...she said that she has just loved me unflinchingly. Whatever you call it...it does exsist...and it feels amazing.

Pretty Woman · 05-14-2010, 10:49 AM

Let me start by saying that I don't believe that altruism exists. What does that have to do with unconditional love you may wonder? In my mind they are inextricably linked since both assume that the person on the giving end doesn't really get anything from it and that in many ways the person on the receiving end can act as they please, for better or for worse. We are humans, blinded by our true motives, looking always for some deeper recognition or validation, basically just wanting to feel relevant on this planet and in this life.
So...I've come to the conclusion that the only person I can unconditionally love is me. And I don't mean in a narcissitic way. I mean that when I mess up, get angry, act out, am selfish, that I can investigate my true motives and acknowledge them, set things straight, give myself a little break and resolve to not keep making the same mistakes over and over again. It's only in that way that I have been able to begin to see clearly that others are also human beings, that it is truly difficult to exact change from the inside out and that I can't ever control another person by my unconditional love dressed up as a doormat, a bossy wog or in any other way that I choose to call things love. I agree with Jo, unconditional love for another is meted out on a daily basis...disagreement, discussion, compromise and sometimes moving on.

MrSunshine · 05-14-2010, 10:59 AM

it's never unconditional and it's never free....everything comes with a disclaimer or tag these days.

05-14-2010, 10:49 AM	#2
Pretty Woman Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Trying to be true to myself Join Date: May 2010 Location: New York Posts: 73 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 45 Thanked 171 Times in 56 Posts Rep Power: 17333	My Definition Let me start by saying that I don't believe that altruism exists. What does that have to do with unconditional love you may wonder? In my mind they are inextricably linked since both assume that the person on the giving end doesn't really get anything from it and that in many ways the person on the receiving end can act as they please, for better or for worse. We are humans, blinded by our true motives, looking always for some deeper recognition or validation, basically just wanting to feel relevant on this planet and in this life. So...I've come to the conclusion that the only person I can unconditionally love is me. And I don't mean in a narcissitic way. I mean that when I mess up, get angry, act out, am selfish, that I can investigate my true motives and acknowledge them, set things straight, give myself a little break and resolve to not keep making the same mistakes over and over again. It's only in that way that I have been able to begin to see clearly that others are also human beings, that it is truly difficult to exact change from the inside out and that I can't ever control another person by my unconditional love dressed up as a doormat, a bossy wog or in any other way that I choose to call things love. I agree with Jo, unconditional love for another is meted out on a daily basis...disagreement, discussion, compromise and sometimes moving on.

05-14-2010, 10:59 AM	#3
MrSunshine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: The Gardner Preferred Pronoun?: Ummmm Relationship Status: Nah Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Sunshine State, State of Sunshine Posts: 2,616 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,577 Thanked 3,891 Times in 1,155 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	is love unconditional? it's never unconditional and it's never free....everything comes with a disclaimer or tag these days.