Femme Led Relationships and Trans/Butch/Femme Bottoms

[Little_Duck]

Hi everyone!!!

I am not much into posting about gender and stuff since I am like still trying to find who I am and I read ALOT of the things people I know have to say and I like Grant( though not into the whole spankie spankie thing ) am alllllllll about bossy girls!!! (hi June!!!!)

I think it's pretty sad and mean to say that you see Grant as female, I mean I even know at 21 that he ain't female, he is a dude, even our brother who is 9 gets it.

I guess thsi is why I just read, but since Grant is part of our family I needed to show props.

Mad props Grant!!!

We all love you for who you are and that is the guy who was there for our sister during surgery, and is there for our Mommy!!!

That is all I really had to say thank you!!!!

Bye June!!!

[Jess]

Originally Posted by Little_Duck

Hi everyone!!!

I am not much into posting about gender and stuff since I am like still trying to find who I am and I read ALOT of the things people I know have to say and I like Grant( though not into the whole spankie spankie thing ) am alllllllll about bossy girls!!! (hi June!!!!)

I think it's pretty sad and mean to say that you see Grant as female, I mean I even know at 21 that he ain't female, he is a dude, even our brother who is 9 gets it.

I guess thsi is why I just read, but since Grant is part of our family I needed to show props.

Mad props Grant!!!


We all love you for who you are and that is the guy who was there for our sister during surgery, and is there for our Mommy!!!

That is all I really had to say thank you!!!!

Bye June!!!

An apology for Grant if I made improper use of pronoun/ descriptor. Sometimes I get confused by the interchangeable "boi" referring to females who id as masculine and boy which refers to male. My bad. No offense meant Grant.

[Bit]

I get tripped up by screen names sometimes, too. *wry smile* The thing is, when you're making a long post (or multi-quoting like I usually do), you can't see the profile info to double-check, so if it's someone you don't know well, there's nothing to go by BUT the screen name.

[weatherboi]

Little_Duck-
thanks for this...you are an incredible person and i am honored by your support!!!! i love all you guys very much!!!

You da bomb!
Grant

Originally Posted by Little_Duck

Hi everyone!!!

I am not much into posting about gender and stuff since I am like still trying to find who I am and I read ALOT of the things people I know have to say and I like Grant( though not into the whole spankie spankie thing ) am alllllllll about bossy girls!!! (hi June!!!!)

i like bossy girls too!!!

I think it's pretty sad and mean to say that you see Grant as female, I mean I even know at 21 that he ain't female, he is a dude, even our brother who is 9 gets it.

I guess thsi is why I just read, but since Grant is part of our family I needed to show props.

Mad props Grant!!!

We all love you for who you are and that is the guy who was there for our sister during surgery, and is there for our Mommy!!!

That is all I really had to say thank you!!!!

Bye June!!!

[weatherboi]

jess my feedback has been just the opposite...so i will say again the intent of this thread is about femme led relationships and trans/butch bottoms..open to all...all have been invited to join...if something being said is a put off then let the thread know and we will respect that but so far i am not getting that feed back.


Bit, I agree. I think it is a great conversation and have received quite a few notes from other folks not into Leather/ BDSM who had felt they didn't really have a place to talk about it ( gender and relationship roles) and thought this was more for BDSM folks.

Thanks for what you shared. It makes perfect sense to me!

[Toughy]

Originally Posted by weatherboi

hi Toughy-

for me, the term 'bottoms run the fuck' illicits a 'slap in the face' so to speak to traditional kink values. it to me 'dumb downs' the idea of the power exchange. an oxymoron in phrase and theory. from my own perspective which is not the same perspective you come from. this works well in my relationship.

from my knees i say i can't/don't equate the theories my Ms or her Peers have to the level of humbleness in their hearts. my experience is they shine with great strength and that humbles me.

thanks for your comments......

I've been in and out of the kink community for around 30 years. It has always had a role in my life since I was in my 20's....I will be 58 in a couple of months. Sometimes I am part of the public kink community and sometimes I not, however that does not mean it is not part of my core being....it is.

I'm not sure what you mean by 'traditional kink values'. In my time, kink values have changed considerably. When I came out...........consent meant you walked in the door. There were no safe words. There was no negotiation in the sense we think of it today.

We kink folks have rightfully changed our values over time. We have gone from no rules, to Safe, Sane, Consensual (SSC), to Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK).

For Me.......'the bottom runs the fuck' is not a slap in anyone's face. It does not lessen the power dynamic....in My mind it enhances the power dynamic because we started as equals and she then gives Me the gift of her pain and submission.

Thanks for the conversation. It has been interesting.

edited to add: I cannot speak to the gay man Old Guard ways. In my time women were not allowed in that community. I do know that for many years in both the Old Guard and the women's kink community you had to start from the bottom. You earned your leathers by experiencing being on your knees. I know .....I've been there and will still go there when that 'itch' strikes. However I live in the kink world as a Top/Dom 99.5% of the time.