How about butch and butch?

[Lyte]

I just stumbled upon this thread. Looking forward to getting caught up on previous posts.

For some reason... I've been getting approached by butches lately. Its always awkward to convey to someone (subtlety or directly) that you're not interested. It feels even more so to tell someone that it's because they're butch. It feels a bit like shutting someone down before they even get out the gate. I don't like how that feels or sounds.

I like the femme energy ... and all that comes with it... that is opposite to my own masculine energy. The Ying and Yang that I find in butch/femme relationships.

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by Lyte

I just stumbled upon this thread. Looking forward to getting caught up on previous posts.

For some reason... I've been getting approached by butches lately. Its always awkward to convey to someone (subtlety or directly) that you're not interested. It feels even more so to tell someone that it's because they're butch. It feels a bit like shutting someone down before they even get out the gate. I don't like how that feels or sounds.

I like the femme energy ... and all that comes with it... that is opposite to my own masculine energy. The Ying and Yang that I find in butch/femme relationships.

So you are saying that you don't think a butch/butch can be a ying/yang deal?

[Lyte]

I think I'm saying... I've not met a butch that had the complimentary ... which has always been opposite energy .. that I dig.

No doubt there can be different types of Ying/Yang between two people. And no doubt some people dig Ying/Ying or Yang/Yang. I've just not experienced any combination that has led me towards butch women.

Originally Posted by JDeere

So you are saying that you don't think a butch/butch can be a ying/yang deal?

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by Lyte

I think I'm saying... I've not met a butch that had the complimentary ... which has always been opposite energy .. that I dig.

No doubt there can be different types of Ying/Yang between two people. And no doubt some people dig Ying/Ying or Yang/Yang. I've just not experienced any combination that has led me towards butch women.

I understand what you mean, however not all butches ID as women.

[JDeere]

Anyone else open to this? I am curious to see the ratio of butch/butch to butch/femme!

[firegal]

Originally Posted by JDeere

Anyone else open to this? I am curious to see the ratio of butch/butch to butch/femme!

Butch/femme has been my history. For me its like "Baskin and Robbins" 31 flavors..... most folks love ice cream... but we all dont pick the same flavor..And you can savor more than one flavor

[homoe]

Originally Posted by FireSignFemme

Once I came home from work and caught my partner, who was butch and my ex, also butch, doing the do in the living room. On the hide-a-bed. So yeah it's out there. You just have to work to find it.

Oh dear.............

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by Lyte

I think I'm saying... I've not met a butch that had the complimentary ... which has always been opposite energy .. that I dig.

No doubt there can be different types of Ying/Yang between two people. And no doubt some people dig Ying/Ying or Yang/Yang. I've just not experienced any combination that has led me towards butch women.

I think this is a good way of putting it. I'm a femme that *has* met other femmes that have tripped that yin/yang dance step. And that's when I am attracted to another femme - but only then. And and also I'm attracted to non-iding tomboy types who do the same thing.

Basically I don't care what the ID is of the person anymore, I care about the yin/yang thing, some kink yin/yang suitability too, the similar values, similar humour, and respecting each others independence (as I personally define my needs around that).

So I don't think the ID matters much in that regard, it can come inn any package.

to some folks, it does matter. It did matter to me, very much up until a couple years ago, even though I started to meet more and more femmes that *had* that yang to my yin that I went "oh! hello..." over.

I still don't find certain kinds of femininity very attractive - but then, I don't find certain kinds of masculinity very attractive either - never have. So I think that's more about the type of chocolate, rather than not liking chocolate itself (really don't like milk chocolate much and can't stand white chocolate, but I go ape for dark, dark chocolate, or spicy dark. Or semi-sweet dark)

But say 10 years ago, I would have been happy to fool around with a femme but never have a relationship with one.

I think there are plenty of butches who are slowly figuring their way around this. Most of the butches I personally know have zero issue with shagging other butches, most would date other butches and half of them would have relationships with other butches whether they be women, genderqueer, or trans.

But I don't live where you do JDeer. Most of the people I'm speaking of live in Canada or the UK.