Breaking up - Page 5

homoe · 12-04-2019, 08:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kittygrrl

so sorry this is happening to you..it's like losing a part of you and the immensity of that...no one can truly understand..unless you've been through it..I suggest don't prolong the pain get out as soon as you can..stuff (be damned) every piece will only serve to remind you what you've lost ..so everything you decide to keep, will remind you everytime you see or use it..do you really need that? my advise (in this situation) sell everything you can, give the rest away, and travel light (out of this toxic situation)..there is life after this but it's going to take awhile before you can recognize it and feel safe again.

I agree about "stuff"! I've seen friends go thru breakups where they are fighting about "who gets what" or "what was who's" etc etc.. .. to me that is totally craziness! It's only stuff and it can be replaced quickly and easily!

Personally for me, getting back out there, well that took a lot longer!

homoe · 12-18-2019, 07:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by homoe

I agree about "stuff"! I've seen friends go thru breakups where they are fighting about "who gets what" or "what was who's" etc etc.. .. to me that is totally craziness! It's only stuff and it can be replaced quickly and easily!

Personally for me, getting back out there, well that took a lot longer!

I can't help it but when I see couples fighting over "stuff" I ALWAYS think about the scene with the wagon wheel coffee table in When Harry Met Sally!

Chad · 12-18-2019, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by homoe

I can't help it but when I see couples fighting over "stuff" I ALWAYS think about the scene with the wagon wheel coffee table in When Harry Met Sally!

My two cents, If it is not inherited or irreplaceable then it does not matter. Let go and move on.

homoe · 12-19-2019, 01:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chad

My two cents, If it is not inherited or irreplaceable then it does not matter. Let go and move on.

...

Stone-Butch · 12-19-2019, 08:28 AM

I agree and disagree. When I left my 22 yr relationship I had 3 beautiful animals , two dogs and a cat. All loved very much. I signed our house over to my wife as well as the trailer. I took what was on my back and the rec room furniture. Bed from the guest room , and dressers. So I signed over a three bedroom house, three beautiful animals (did not want to break them up or have them in an apt.). I now have a one bedroom apt. I have no animals and most of all I am not with my loving woman. All gone with the few strokes of a pen. WHY? Cause she was wonderful and deserving so I walked away. I cant get any of these back so yes it was the thing to do but my whole life has changed so it is good to do but it is heartbreaking. End of story.

cathexis · 12-20-2019, 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chad

My two cents, If it is not inherited or irreplaceable then it does not matter. Let go and move on.

What advice have you for situations where one has lost all inheritance and irreplaceable 18th-19th large antique collection as well as all family items incl. photographs and artwork in addition to all my art deco bedroom set, clothing, and maybe (not sure) worse, my home. Mourning daily.

20 years later, I am still reeling from the loss. Psychiatric care, counseling, anti-depressants, and anxiolytics provide no relief from the emotional pain.

I am a physical masochist and can take quite a bit of pain, but this emotional pain has me licked. The tunnel is only black, no steam valves, no relief and no light at the end. I have no pain killers, don't drink, no drugs. The only thread is my Partner who doesn't deal well with emotional issues. Don't get me wrong, She does protect and provide well. I feel physically safe in Her care, but I haven't left the apartment for a year except for doctors appointments. I wake up, watch TV, online is my only contact with the world outside. The world is closing in on me.

Chad · 12-21-2019, 07:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cathexis

What advice have you for situations where one has lost all inheritance and irreplaceable 18th-19th large antique collection as well as all family items incl. photographs and artwork in addition to all my art deco bedroom set, clothing, and maybe (not sure) worse, my home. Mourning daily.

20 years later, I am still reeling from the loss. Psychiatric care, counseling, anti-depressants, and anxiolytics provide no relief from the emotional pain.

I am a physical masochist and can take quite a bit of pain, but this emotional pain has me licked. The tunnel is only black, no steam valves, no relief and no light at the end. I have no pain killers, don't drink, no drugs. The only thread is my Partner who doesn't deal well with emotional issues. Don't get me wrong, She does protect and provide well. I feel physically safe in Her care, but I haven't left the apartment for a year except for doctors appointments. I wake up, watch TV, online is my only contact with the world outside. The world is closing in on me.

I am sorry that you have suffered and that you are still suffering. I hope that your situation improves.

I don't have any personal experience or professional experience in this area. Keep fighting for a better life and reach out to those that can help you.

Vincent · 12-26-2019, 04:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cathexis

What advice have you for situations where one has lost all inheritance and irreplaceable 18th-19th large antique collection as well as all family items incl. photographs and artwork in addition to all my art deco bedroom set, clothing, and maybe (not sure) worse, my home. Mourning daily.

20 years later, I am still reeling from the loss. Psychiatric care, counseling, anti-depressants, and anxiolytics provide no relief from the emotional pain.

I am a physical masochist and can take quite a bit of pain, but this emotional pain has me licked. The tunnel is only black, no steam valves, no relief and no light at the end. I have no pain killers, don't drink, no drugs. The only thread is my Partner who doesn't deal well with emotional issues. Don't get me wrong, She does protect and provide well. I feel physically safe in Her care, but I haven't left the apartment for a year except for doctors appointments. I wake up, watch TV, online is my only contact with the world outside. The world is closing in on me.

For me I have no family contact,and have accepted I will get zero,of the money my Dad left me 30 yrs ago.
I do have my father in my heart.I try not dwell on the past,"sometimes not easy at all"but I keep practicing.I have found happiness,in my music,taking Scout to the beach,my garden,going to the gym,even though it's 3 am to avoid people.
I find it funny,once my life was full of people,but now most people annoy me and talk nonsense anyway.
I wish I could help,but at least I can listen and hear you,some of us are sensitive,that capitalisim has driven us to self contained.Take care

homoe · 12-26-2019, 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chad

My two cents, If it is not inherited or irreplaceable then it does not matter. Let go and move on.

Exactly Chad....stuff can be replaced but finding a person, well that's a bit more trickier!

Chad · 12-26-2019, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by homoe

Exactly Chad....stuff can be replaced but finding a person, well that's a bit more trickier!

Oh my goodness how I want out of this thread. Luckily all my stuff is inherited. I wish folks would stop stealing from me. If I had all the money femmes stole from me I could pay off my medical bills.
I am sure they smile knowing they took me for a fool.

They are wrong Chad is no fool. They ruined their reputation and may have a legal problem.

~ocean · 12-27-2019, 05:49 AM

PEOPLE steal and premeditate their actions in a relationship or rather their next stop. butches, femmes etc. it happened that's all you can do. I always felt their should be a thread at a site so others can put up warnings about that person. ohhhh like the NAUGHTY LIST , just not the good kind of naughty lol

12-19-2019, 08:28 AM	#85
Stone-Butch Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Stonebutch Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Canada Posts: 3,620 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,226 Thanked 9,292 Times in 3,001 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Breaking Up I agree and disagree. When I left my 22 yr relationship I had 3 beautiful animals , two dogs and a cat. All loved very much. I signed our house over to my wife as well as the trailer. I took what was on my back and the rec room furniture. Bed from the guest room , and dressers. So I signed over a three bedroom house, three beautiful animals (did not want to break them up or have them in an apt.). I now have a one bedroom apt. I have no animals and most of all I am not with my loving woman. All gone with the few strokes of a pen. WHY? Cause she was wonderful and deserving so I walked away. I cant get any of these back so yes it was the thing to do but my whole life has changed so it is good to do but it is heartbreaking. End of story.

12-27-2019, 05:49 AM	#91
~ocean Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme blows a kiss off my finger tips * Preferred Pronoun?: ~ hey girl ~ Relationship Status: ~ single & content ~ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Massachusetts ~coastal Posts: 7,905 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22,958 Thanked 16,042 Times in 4,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	PEOPLE steal and premeditate their actions in a relationship or rather their next stop. butches, femmes etc. it happened that's all you can do. I always felt their should be a thread at a site so others can put up warnings about that person. ohhhh like the NAUGHTY LIST , just not the good kind of naughty lol __________________ ~ Always, ocean