Gay Marriage until...a break up. Why Gays need to walk the walk.

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by honeybarbara

sorry I'm a bit confused. Of course if you get married you have to go through the same legal ritual of divorce if you end it. It's a legal contract involving notice to the gov't about your status. If that should change, you have to declare it. like if you job changes. or you move and you still wish to vote.

So I'm kinda lost. it's all exactly the same. You have to undo what was done. after falling out. which makes things hellish.

I can't imagine the kind of hoop jumping inki and I have been doing for a year through four different countries to get it *undone* but with extremely sore feelings and deep feelings of hurt and rejection at the same time, rather than a sense of joy and certainty. dear god that sounds like hell on earth to me.

I hope, if it ever happens I can be as civil as my parents were. They screwed up. But they didn't fight over the kids, they never fought in front of us, they shared one lawyer between them to save costs.

I so like hearing this! when I did work as a family therapist with divorcing couples, what transpired betwen the partners not only in front of the kids, but in manipulating the kids was the most difficult challenge in the work. many people do not go there, but so often, this is the exception. Kudos to your parents! also, it is obvious that that modeling would be an asset for you if you did find yoursekves in a dissolution.
and there was a *lot* of serious wounding between the two of them. Both felt completely betrayed, ignored, disliked and belittled.

But they got over it and are good friends now.

Yup, can happen!

I think that shows a different kind of commitment, especially as they did it initially (trying to get along through a divorce) because of the kids. My hat off to them.

Mine, too!

I have been wondering how same-sex divorces would play out. One problem I am having is with this one being a celebrity oriented one in which privacy is just not going to happen. Guess, I want to see how just we commoners handle it. We don't really have the experience of a legally sanctioned marriage, let alone divorce. I see some key differences just due to our lack of having this right which has influenced our relationship history.

[Soon]

Originally Posted by AtLastHome

Mine, too!

I have been wondering how same-sex divorces would play out. One problem I am having is with this one being a celebrity oriented one in which privacy is just not going to happen. Guess, I want to see how just we commoners handle it. We don't really have the experience of a legally sanctioned marriage, let alone divorce. I see some key differences just due to our lack of having this right which has influenced our relationship history.

I am sure you there are many who have legal marriages and divorces in the States that allow them.

In Canada, all marriages and divorces are handled in the exact same way as any other. There are absolutely no differences in the execution of either the making of a legal commitment or the dissolving of it over here. One (maybe?) difference we do have is that our marriage licenses do not indicate gender for either spouse.

Or maybe you are just asking about how people handle the divorce? As with any, painfully I presume and, for some, legal drama.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by SuperFemme

The line I bolded is what I want to talk about.

I don't know the particulars of the singers break up, nor do I want to. I was just using it as an example - of a visible queer that has advocated for Gay Marriage, and is not ending hers like everyone else who has been afforded that basic civil right.

Perhaps Melissa Etheridge was a bad example? I just read something about it and it made me start thinking, hence the subject in this thread.

I am not saying Ethridge is a bad example, but the issue is in court and she is paying all her exe's bills and wants to share custody according to court documents.

I think the media as usually is spinning it in a bad way and people were commenting on her character. Let's know what really is going on before throwing some one under the proverbial bus.

I mean, if a straight woman said her/his celebrity husband/wife left her/him with $4.00 to her name would we automatically believe her?

But yes, Gay marriages should be dissolved the same way any marriage is, and big props to people who manage to break up or divorce with zero ugliness!