Mental Illness

[Andrew, Jr.]

3 days ago my bio-father was rushed to the hospital. His diabetes is out of control, he has bronch./pnemonia, and his heart rhythm is causing his pacemaker to go off. Now he is on dialysis. I was called late last night by my bio-mother. She asked me to call my siblings because she just couldn't. Now my twitch has come back (from my ocd) and it starting up again. Shit. No other way to say it.

My stress level is wayyy up there. There is this one nurse or cnp who is nasty, and has the personality of a pea. I am just waiting to say :shutup: which is so unlike me (really). I think that pretty much summs up my anxiety level.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by Andrew, Jr.

3 days ago my bio-father was rushed to the hospital. His diabetes is out of control, he has bronch./pnemonia, and his heart rhythm is causing his pacemaker to go off. Now he is on dialysis. I was called late last night by my bio-mother. She asked me to call my siblings because she just couldn't. Now my twitch has come back (from my ocd) and it starting up again. Shit. No other way to say it.

My stress level is wayyy up there. There is this one nurse or cnp who is nasty, and has the personality of a pea. I am just waiting to say :shutup: which is so unlike me (really). I think that pretty much summs up my anxiety level.

I completely understand, dealing with most family stuff gives me a twitch.

Remember (and I have a hard time with this myself) the nurse works for you, you don't work for her. If someone is nasty, tell their superior.

[Andrew, Jr.]

This place is so dirty. OMG. I am washing my hands all the times. I just went thru the hand sanitizers my mother had. Now, I am back and forth in the bathroom washing, and washing. I am back to step 1.

[MsTinkerbelly]

Hi there all...

I'm joining in the middle of the thread, and I hope that's okay.

I have Borderline Personality Disorder or BPD for short. It is often passed along down the female side of the family, and I have noticed that my mother has it and my daughter is showing signs. BPD affects 2% of the population, mostly women.

It took the break up of my relationship to finally figure out what was wrong, and why I was unable to form lasting friendships and relationships. My Marriage is now back on track, and all of my interactions are becoming easier in general. Oh I still have BPD, and I still don't like most people, but the way I deal with people is changing every day. I can regulate myself better, although I still occasionally do lose all perspective and have an episode.

When I am completely stressed I have OCD issues, where I check over and over for my keys before I can leave the house or get out of my car. When those episodes begin, I keep my keys in my hand and stare at them as I exit. It is not a cure, but at least I can move.

Thank you all for sharing...it really helps to know I am not alone.

[Andrew, Jr.]

Hi and Welcome BlushingFemme!

[Mindy]

Music is great. I find that it often helps make my mood brighter when I'm feeling down. There are times, though, when i'm down that I listen to stuff that makes my mood worse, because I'm listening to music that "fits" my mood. A lot of times when I'm angry and upset I like to listen to loud, angry music with the volume on high. I'll listen to it a bit, do housework and the movement and the music makes me feel better after a bit. When I'm feeling better, the volume goes down and the music style changes. Can't do it where I'm living now, no loud music, no music at all unless it's through my head phones, otherwise there are fights over the music. I live with music haters! lol... not really, we just have huge differences on what constitutes "good" music.

[JustLovelyJenn]

The question about music in relation to treatment for mental illness is quite ironic to me at the moment. I too fair far better with the world when I see it beyond the blare of my music, but financial situations have not allowed me to have a CD player or mp3 player for myself in quite some time.

I just recently started throwing a CD in the DVD player to do my work again. I can't tell you how much of a Godsend music is. It calms my anxiety, releases my tension and makes the world a manageable place again. When I am angry, I put on a song and sing my lungs out. When I want to cry I put on something with a beat and focus on the rhythm. Without music I would never make it through a day, even without the CD playing I am singing to myself. I would have given up on trying so long ago if it weren't for the music.

[atomiczombie]

Originally Posted by Blushingfemme

Hi there all...

I'm joining in the middle of the thread, and I hope that's okay.

I have Borderline Personality Disorder or BPD for short. It is often passed along down the female side of the family, and I have noticed that my mother has it and my daughter is showing signs. BPD affects 2% of the population, mostly women.

It took the break up of my relationship to finally figure out what was wrong, and why I was unable to form lasting friendships and relationships. My Marriage is now back on track, and all of my interactions are becoming easier in general. Oh I still have BPD, and I still don't like most people, but the way I deal with people is changing every day. I can regulate myself better, although I still occasionally do lose all perspective and have an episode.

When I am completely stressed I have OCD issues, where I check over and over for my keys before I can leave the house or get out of my car. When those episodes begin, I keep my keys in my hand and stare at them as I exit. It is not a cure, but at least I can move.

Thank you all for sharing...it really helps to know I am not alone.

I think it's amazing that you realized you were BPD, and I commend you for taking responsibility for that! That is a very tough thing to do, given the nature of BPD. Most people with it have no clue they have it, let alone take responsibility for it and make a real effort to change. KUDOS!!!

[MsTinkerbelly]

Originally Posted by atomiczombie

I think it's amazing that you realized you were BPD, and I commend you for taking responsibility for that! That is a very tough thing to do, given the nature of BPD. Most people with it have no clue they have it, let alone take responsibility for it and make a real effort to change. KUDOS!!!

Thank you very much. I worked with people with Mental Health issues for 16years, and I knew deep inside something was wrong; the inability to form lasting relationships was very troubling for me.

BPD is a really strange disease, in that you blame EVERYONE else for your problems and issues, and it all seems quite rational.

[atomiczombie]

Originally Posted by Blushingfemme

Thank you very much. I worked with people with Mental Health issues for 16years, and I knew deep inside something was wrong; the inability to form lasting relationships was very troubling for me.

BPD is a really strange disease, in that you blame EVERYONE else for your problems and issues, and it all seems quite rational.

Yes, my ex-wife has it and has no clue. She is verbally and emotionally abusive on top of that, which makes her impossible to deal with rationally. I have had to distance myself from her, which is sad because she has a side that is wonderful. That is the side I fell in love with, but eventually I couldn't deal with her blaming me for everything when she said things that were cruel to me. I understand that she is ill. I think if she realized what was going on and got help she could be a wonderful person to be around. But my leaving her wasn't a wake-up call, and her losing her daughter wasn't either. I don't think she will ever understand what is really going on and that is sad.