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Old 09-28-2010, 08:24 PM   #1
Rockinonahigh
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Default Very uncomfortable situstion.

Since my accident in 07 I havent had any kind of real job so I have made a fue bucks hear and there doing odd careting gigs,giveing rideing lessons ect.I got with this group that is run by the state gov and funded by the feds..sorta like an elder job placement group.I told them I had plenty of clothes to wear to work but they insisted that I go to dress for success..the problem is thay sent me to the womens part of it.I tryed my best to go to the mens dress for sucsess but no mater how I try to explane things to them it never worked,so I just went went along with it all cause I wouldnt be wearing them anyway..they r hanging in my colset and will be there a long time.Then they came up with this womens buisness club than meets once a month,then after the meeting u get more stuff.Where im intrested in the buisness concept of the meeting for the buisness world,I am feeling more and like im giveing up to much of who I am to gain this job.I need to work for many reasons so im just going to deal with it as best as I can ,but it still irks me big time.I hope I made scence with this.
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Old 09-28-2010, 10:38 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by Rockinonahigh View Post
Since my accident in 07 I havent had any kind of real job so I have made a fue bucks hear and there doing odd careting gigs,giveing rideing lessons ect.I got with this group that is run by the state gov and funded by the feds..sorta like an elder job placement group.I told them I had plenty of clothes to wear to work but they insisted that I go to dress for success..the problem is thay sent me to the womens part of it.I tryed my best to go to the mens dress for sucsess but no mater how I try to explane things to them it never worked,so I just went went along with it all cause I wouldnt be wearing them anyway..they r hanging in my colset and will be there a long time.Then they came up with this womens buisness club than meets once a month,then after the meeting u get more stuff.Where im intrested in the buisness concept of the meeting for the buisness world,I am feeling more and like im giveing up to much of who I am to gain this job.I need to work for many reasons so im just going to deal with it as best as I can ,but it still irks me big time.I hope I made scence with this.
Rockin, I have been in this position. I think many butches, FTMs and others with a biological body that does not "match up" with the expected gender expressions, performance, appearance. It is easier said then done when you are trying to keep a roof over your head, food on the table and the other basics of taking care of yourself and maybe others. I have been to Shreveport and honestly I am not comfortable when I am there because of my gender expression, my obvious queerness. I cannot in good conscious tell you how to handle it. I have not had to live in your situation. I can tell you, I hear you and feel for your situation. However you decide to handle it, know that you are a human being of value and you are part of a larger community that reaches beyond the "norms" and values of Shreveport. Good luck.
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Old 09-28-2010, 11:14 PM   #3
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Rockin remember you are not your cloths, do what you need to keep yourself safe and employed. None of us are going to judge you, and those who do don't really matter.
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Old 09-29-2010, 06:52 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by Rockinonahigh View Post
Since my accident in 07 I havent had any kind of real job so I have made a fue bucks hear and there doing odd careting gigs,giveing rideing lessons ect.I got with this group that is run by the state gov and funded by the feds..sorta like an elder job placement group.I told them I had plenty of clothes to wear to work but they insisted that I go to dress for success..the problem is thay sent me to the womens part of it.I tryed my best to go to the mens dress for sucsess but no mater how I try to explane things to them it never worked,so I just went went along with it all cause I wouldnt be wearing them anyway..they r hanging in my colset and will be there a long time.Then they came up with this womens buisness club than meets once a month,then after the meeting u get more stuff.Where im intrested in the buisness concept of the meeting for the buisness world,I am feeling more and like im giveing up to much of who I am to gain this job.I need to work for many reasons so im just going to deal with it as best as I can ,but it still irks me big time.I hope I made scence with this.
I think most butches/FtMs/etc. have experienced something like what you're describing at some point in life and can sympathise. I know I can understand that feeling you describe of giving up too much of yourself, and I think even those who don't id as such have had to endure that feeling at one point in life. Like others have said, deal with your situation as you think it should be dealt with. We all have to do the same. At the end of the day, staying true to yourself is what's in your mind rather than the unpleasant situations you have to endure.
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Old 09-29-2010, 08:18 AM   #5
Rockinonahigh
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Thanks to all that replyed to my post,and I take your words to heart..Its just been a long time since I had to deal with this sort of thing..ya know I thought being it was now 2010 even hear, it would be a bit less of an issue..gess not.As far as my working situation It wont matter what im wearing to work cause im being issued a jacket to wear at work over whatever I have on wich will be buttondown shirts,and I am wearing dress slacks and appropreate comfy shoes.One thing I found intresting thrue all this was that they have a long full length mirror..well I havent seen myself in one for a while so I was surprised at the body changes from my work outs..I have turned into a weight lifters body so even with the exception of a bit to much belly is better than I had hoped for.
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