What Cracked You Up Today?

Kenna · 01-19-2011, 09:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DomnNC

I know! I had to keep trying it to make sure I was actually having to CHEW jello, wth. Even the fork had issues going into it, was the first time I ever had to eat jello with a fork instead of a spoon too!

Are you sure it wasn't "fake" jello?
kinda like those fake deli food displays that's made out of colored apoxy? I'll have to tell you about my sister's childhood experience with "fake" plastic grapes, one day... but it doesn't come close to your Jello fun last night!!

I admit... you were a very good sport letting us laugh and make jest of you!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by DomnNC

You're right! I think we could make a fortune off it! We could even make those memory foam mattresses with it! I wonder if I could steal their recipe, lol, cuz they sure the heck didn't follow the directions on the box!

Memory foam mattresses.... something for the NASA space shuttle...or new cushions for Coach Airplane seats? How about running shoe soles?
Or!!! BETTER YET!!!
How's about we do like Robin Williams and "electrify" some FLUBBER???

I think "our boat just came in"!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by DomnNC

Do it! Do it! I double dog dare ya!!!

Double dog? REALLY????
Seriously??

If you double dog dare me, that means I get to send the other FOUR dogs and FIVE cats to your house for the weekend?

DomnNC · 01-19-2011, 10:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet

Are you sure it wasn't "fake" jello?
kinda like those fake deli food displays that's made out of colored apoxy? I'll have to tell you about my sister's childhood experience with "fake" plastic grapes, one day... but it doesn't come close to your Jello fun last night!!

I admit... you were a very good sport letting us laugh and make jest of you!!

Chuckles, well it was quite funny indeed.

Memory foam mattresses.... something for the NASA space shuttle...or new cushions for Coach Airplane seats? How about running shoe soles?
Or!!! BETTER YET!!!
How's about we do like Robin Williams and "electrify" some FLUBBER???

I think "our boat just came in"!!

Now that glove looks like the green jello!! I bet it could hold that shape too!

Double dog? REALLY????
Seriously??

If you double dog dare me, that means I get to send the other FOUR dogs and FIVE cats to your house for the weekend?

Lol, ohhh nooo, you get to keep them! Don't ya remember that double dog dare from A Christmas Story? Ya gotta do it now, it's the dreaded double dog dare!

Kenna · 01-19-2011, 10:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DomnNC

Now that glove looks like the green jello!! I bet it could hold that shape too!

That "glove" is FLUBBER....
"it looks like rubber, so he calls it Flubber"
The jello looked like jello, turned out to be tougher than rubber, was "springy" and never failed to "pop" back into it's original shape!! With those qualities, we've got either something similar to Flubber....or a good replacement for old fashioned silicone implants!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by DomnNC

Lol, ohhh nooo, you get to keep them! Don't ya remember that double dog dare from A Christmas Story? Ya gotta do it now, it's the dreaded double dog dare!

Okay....apparently, we haven't "informed" ya what happens when Sweet gets dared to do something....

didn't you hear the story last night about the Windstream Repair Tech?

DomnNC · 01-20-2011, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sweet

That "glove" is FLUBBER....
"it looks like rubber, so he calls it Flubber"
The jello looked like jello, turned out to be tougher than rubber, was "springy" and never failed to "pop" back into it's original shape!! With those qualities, we've got either something similar to Flubber....or a good replacement for old fashioned silicone implants!!!

Oh, excellent use for it!!

Okay....apparently, we haven't "informed" ya what happens when Sweet gets dared to do something....

didn't you hear the story last night about the Windstream Repair Tech?

Yep I heard. He left never to return, chuckles.

dixie · 01-21-2011, 06:44 AM

Well crud. I posted it then tried to type somthing and now it's disappeared. Guess I'll go find it again... but in the meantime, thought this was pretty neat too...

Rook · 01-21-2011, 08:46 AM

Mum : "Oh crap, I confused movies, no wonder...It's Golda"..

bailey : "Meir?"

Mum: "Yeah, serious chain smoker"

bailey : "yeah, so I hear"

Mum: "Heyy look who played her husband..."

bailey : "heyy ..Spock"...

[both of 'em tryin to do the Hand thingy, Me walkin in, watchin, smirking]

Me: "aww...y'all can't do this?" [successfully impeccably does 'Live Long and Prosper' sign.....with both hands]

Me: "I can also do this"[curls my tongue], Iths genethic!"

Both of 'em :"Gah, fuck you...."
Me: "U hate me cuz u aint me...-MWAH-"

Blade · 01-22-2011, 09:15 AM

I typed in Red Ryder BB Gun into Google. This is what I came up with. I guess the little fart stuck the barrel in his mouth. I've seen kids shot with bb guns but this is a first.

katsarecool · 01-22-2011, 09:47 AM

An eight year old family members asks me in Wal Mart near the customer service area. We were discussing how well he is doing in school. "When we get to third grade that is when we get periods right?" Me: Well Nick I don't know about that.
He was trying to ask me if they would begin changing classes several times a day like the older kids.
I refuse to answer questions about the Birds and the Bees and refer them to their parents.

durrrrrrrr · 01-22-2011, 03:31 PM

this commercial cracked me up, especially the last thing the dude says

lionpaw · 01-22-2011, 11:37 PM

Watching the character on the A- team (Murdock) talking about the golf ball liberation front.....

1PlayfulFemme · 01-23-2011, 07:54 AM

1PlayfulFemme · 01-23-2011, 07:59 AM

Gemme · 01-23-2011, 07:52 PM

Our after dinner conversation in the car driving home about exactly what Elmo would or would not do for crack, using our own Elmo voices, of course.

We're fantastically brilliant sometimes.

Blade · 01-23-2011, 08:55 PM

headlines in the local paper.....Coroner: man hit by train was standing on tracks...DUH!

I have 3 puppy loves in here Skippy is on my bed and Tashi and Willie are laying in the floor beside my desk. Skippy is much smaller than them and he thinks he's a German Shepherd. Anyway Skippy stands up on the edge of my bed and Willie stands in the floor, with his paws on the edge of my bed....they touch noses....I'm thinking this should be good...they eye each other for a few seconds and then lick each other in the nose at the same time. I cracked up I don't think this is what any of the 3 of us expected.

DomnNC · 01-23-2011, 09:23 PM

Chuckles, they sound like my two. Sassy who is a 60 pound beagle/larger jack breed will kneel down on her front two legs, put her head sideways on the floor so the lil 20 pound pug/chihuahua mix can put his upper body on her head and the growling and noises that come from them you'd think they are getting ready to rip each other's head off but they are just playing, lol. They do it all the time. It cracks me up to watch them.

Blade · 01-25-2011, 07:48 PM

Have you met my parents? Ummm so much for a nice quiet evening...........again.

Blade · 01-26-2011, 07:55 PM

As I merged off of the main road this afternoon I noticed the car in front of me had his right turn signal still blinking. That is pretty normal, a lot of people forget to turn it off after the turn which is really a fork in the road.

I followed the car probably 7 miles out blinker still flashing and he suddenly slammed on breaks........a rafter of turkeys had walked out in the road in front of him....all I can figure is they must have thought he was turning too...shrugs......so after they strutted across the road, the car pulled on off and turned his blinker off.

Kenna · 01-26-2011, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blade

As I merged off of the main road this afternoon I noticed the car in front of me had his right turn signal still blinking. That is pretty normal, a lot of people forget to turn it off after the turn which is really a fork in the road.

I followed the car probably 7 miles out blinker still flashing and he suddenly slammed on breaks........a rafter of turkeys had walked out in the road in front of him....all I can figure is they must have thought he was turning too...shrugs......so after they strutted across the road, the car pulled on off and turned his blinker off.

I'm a country bumpkin and have encountered wild turkeys before.....
But what is a rafter of turkeys? I thought your rafters were in the attic? Is there a rafter of turkeys in the attic along with a gaggle of geese? If so, you better get the pooper scooper!!

Ohhhh...and how do you pull a car on off the road? Is it on... or is it off... or is that a nice way of saying the guy swerved on and off the road to keep from hitting the turkeys?

What cracked Sweet up today..... Blade and Sweet always have such fun at home picking and laughing at each other on how we "talk" or say funny things.

Blade · 01-27-2011, 04:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blade

As I merged off of the main road this afternoon I noticed the car in front of me had his right turn signal still blinking. That is pretty normal, a lot of people forget to turn it off after the turn which is really a fork in the road.

I followed the car probably 7 miles out blinker still flashing and he suddenly slammed on breaks........a rafter of turkeys had walked out in the road in front of him....all I can figure is they must have thought he was turning too...shrugs......so after they strutted across the road, the car pulled on off and turned his blinker off.

ok so I was exhausted and missed this one LOL I'm just suprised "HSIN" didn't call me out on this one, she's slipping

Leigh · 01-27-2011, 06:51 PM

A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside. His eye fluttered open and he murmured, "You're beautiful." Flattered the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later, her husband woke up and said, "You're cute." Startled, she asked him, "What happened to beautiful?" "The drugs are wearing off," he replied.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

A couple came upon a wishing well. The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The husband decided to make a wish too. But he leaned over too much, fell into the well and drowned. The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It really works!"

01-21-2011, 06:44 AM	#5
dixie Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: I usually just poke it with a stick. Preferred Pronoun?: Bitch Relationship Status: Intertwined deeply Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: We're all a little mad here. Posts: 6,627 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,972 Thanked 21,383 Times in 4,808 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Well crud. I posted it then tried to type somthing and now it's disappeared. Guess I'll go find it again... but in the meantime, thought this was pretty neat too... Last edited by dixie; 01-21-2011 at 06:49 AM.

01-21-2011, 08:46 AM	#6
Rook Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A.G - Stone Butch - GenderFuck Preferred Pronoun?: Hym, Hyz...or, just b respectable, it's not that hard.. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Columbus Posts: 2,280 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,227 Thanked 3,182 Times in 1,287 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Mum : "Oh crap, I confused movies, no wonder...It's Golda".. bailey : "Meir?" Mum: "Yeah, serious chain smoker" bailey : "yeah, so I hear" Mum: "Heyy look who played her husband..." bailey : "heyy ..Spock"... [both of 'em tryin to do the Hand thingy, Me walkin in, watchin, smirking] Me: "aww...y'all can't do this?" [successfully impeccably does 'Live Long and Prosper' sign.....with both hands] Me: "I can also do this"[curls my tongue], Iths genethic!" Both of 'em :"Gah, fuck you...." Me: "U hate me cuz u aint me...-MWAH-" __________________

01-22-2011, 09:15 AM	#7
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	I typed in Red Ryder BB Gun into Google. This is what I came up with. I guess the little fart stuck the barrel in his mouth. I've seen kids shot with bb guns but this is a first. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

01-22-2011, 09:47 AM	#8
katsarecool Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, Woman Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Between Athens and Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,236 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,849 Thanked 1,765 Times in 734 Posts Rep Power: 323367	An eight year old family members asks me in Wal Mart near the customer service area. We were discussing how well he is doing in school. "When we get to third grade that is when we get periods right?" Me: Well Nick I don't know about that. He was trying to ask me if they would begin changing classes several times a day like the older kids. I refuse to answer questions about the Birds and the Bees and refer them to their parents. __________________

01-22-2011, 03:31 PM	#9
durrrrrrrr Senior Member How Do You Identify?: TG Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: he , him Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: ayup Posts: 3,603 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,299 Thanked 10,217 Times in 2,504 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	this commercial cracked me up, especially the last thing the dude says __________________ http://img1.jurko.net/avatar_1303.gif well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit

01-22-2011, 11:37 PM	#10
lionpaw Member How Do You Identify?: very married lesbian couple-there are two of us that use this site Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: pa Posts: 734 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,585 Thanked 1,579 Times in 517 Posts Rep Power: 2193030	Watching the character on the A- team (Murdock) talking about the golf ball liberation front.....

01-23-2011, 07:54 AM	#11
1PlayfulFemme Member How Do You Identify?: An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?: She, femme through and through Relationship Status: She is my soul. Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust Posts: 1,026 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,890 Thanked 2,362 Times in 697 Posts Rep Power: 21474853

01-23-2011, 07:59 AM	#12
1PlayfulFemme Member How Do You Identify?: An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?: She, femme through and through Relationship Status: She is my soul. Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust Posts: 1,026 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,890 Thanked 2,362 Times in 697 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	The funniest baby moment in existance!!

01-23-2011, 07:52 PM	#13
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 107,914 Times in 25,666 Posts Rep Power: 21474889	Our after dinner conversation in the car driving home about exactly what Elmo would or would not do for crack, using our own Elmo voices, of course. We're fantastically brilliant sometimes. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

01-23-2011, 08:55 PM	#14
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	headlines in the local paper.....Coroner: man hit by train was standing on tracks...DUH! I have 3 puppy loves in here Skippy is on my bed and Tashi and Willie are laying in the floor beside my desk. Skippy is much smaller than them and he thinks he's a German Shepherd. Anyway Skippy stands up on the edge of my bed and Willie stands in the floor, with his paws on the edge of my bed....they touch noses....I'm thinking this should be good...they eye each other for a few seconds and then lick each other in the nose at the same time. I cracked up I don't think this is what any of the 3 of us expected. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

01-23-2011, 09:23 PM	#15
DomnNC Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Male Preferred Pronoun?: He/Him Relationship Status: Widow Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Permanently Banned 11/15/2011 Posts: 1,223 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,618 Thanked 2,582 Times in 837 Posts Rep Power: 0	Chuckles, they sound like my two. Sassy who is a 60 pound beagle/larger jack breed will kneel down on her front two legs, put her head sideways on the floor so the lil 20 pound pug/chihuahua mix can put his upper body on her head and the growling and noises that come from them you'd think they are getting ready to rip each other's head off but they are just playing, lol. They do it all the time. It cracks me up to watch them.

01-25-2011, 07:48 PM	#16
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Have you met my parents? Ummm so much for a nice quiet evening...........again. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

01-26-2011, 07:55 PM	#17
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,412 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	As I merged off of the main road this afternoon I noticed the car in front of me had his right turn signal still blinking. That is pretty normal, a lot of people forget to turn it off after the turn which is really a fork in the road. I followed the car probably 7 miles out blinker still flashing and he suddenly slammed on breaks........a rafter of turkeys had walked out in the road in front of him....all I can figure is they must have thought he was turning too...shrugs......so after they strutted across the road, the car pulled on off and turned his blinker off. __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

01-27-2011, 06:51 PM	#20
Leigh Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, etc Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 7,767 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,029 Thanked 13,024 Times in 4,784 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside. His eye fluttered open and he murmured, "You're beautiful." Flattered the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later, her husband woke up and said, "You're cute." Startled, she asked him, "What happened to beautiful?" "The drugs are wearing off," he replied. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- A couple came upon a wishing well. The wife leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny. The husband decided to make a wish too. But he leaned over too much, fell into the well and drowned. The wife was stunned for a moment but then smiled, "It really works!" __________________ "When you fall off the wagon ... clutch the sides of it until you get a better grip!"