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#1 | |||||
Member
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hey Relationship Status:
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Thank your for this post.
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This has been my experience. I identified as "stone butch" for 14 years, through two relationships, then this happened: Quote:
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I guess I'm an exception to that definition (assumption?). I look, behave, live, am taken for, butcher than butch, but I no longer ID as stone. (I suspect there are a great many more butches like me than is commonly thought.) But, back to this: Quote:
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Hierarchies suck. |
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#2 |
Senior Member
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Good Morning all you wonderful and handsome Stone Butches!!!
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#3 |
Member
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#4 |
Senior Member
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#5 |
Member
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Just got back from a bad date where the woman I was with told me that being with someone "like me" aka a stone made her feel like she wasn't a lesbian anymore, I took her lesbian identity and made her feel straight?!?!
I completely understand that everyone has their opinion, but I clearly told her who I was waaaayyy before we started dating. I just want to thank the femme woman out there who love and appreciate us stone butches. |
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#6 | |
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__________________
-------------------------------------------- life is to short to wake up in the morning with regrets
so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who dont, and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance take it... if it changes your life let it. |
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#7 | |
Roadster Guy
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That is the difference, I think, and I mentioned it earlier. I would only want to be with a woman who DESIRED a butch like myself, not one that is "ok" with me being stone. I want that part of me to be something she prefers in a partner, not something she "accepts" in a partner.
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#8 | |
Senior Member
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![]() I am glad you realize that there are femme's that love and appreciate all you wonderful, handsome stone butches. Nothing gets me going like a stone butch does! |
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#9 | |||
Member
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I agree Dapper, you are right. I definitely want someone who "accepts" me for being stone not who is "ok" with it. I appreciate the support Quote:
Ahhh Cuddly you are such a sweetie, thank you for the support. ![]() |
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#10 | |
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I’ve been with the women who claim that they are attracted to the energy, to the hardness, to an edginess, a confidence, to something they say seems a little remote, a little self-contained- and then in a short period of time I’ve experienced those same women talk of wanting to expose the underbelly, of seeking some compliance and pliability, of wanting to experience the girl behind the Butch. It’s as though there is a belief that a Stone Butch is simply a façade, a layer of clothing, that gets worn and removed at will, but what many don’t understand is that it is not a veneer - so when it is removed- there is nothing of our true selves left. I have attempted to accommodate a sex as they have “always done it”- and as a consequence have had to accept the lack of sexual gratification, but more importantly suffered from a sense of “loosing myself” because of it. And then I discovered a stone Femme, and suddenly knew what it was like to fly high. Neither of you are wrong or imperfect, but like most things in life we need to find our compliment, because just as a mismatch can cause us to loose ourselves, the right one can help us take air. I wish you well.
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I don't act this way to change the world. I act this way so that the goddamn world won't change me!
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#11 |
Member
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i want to speak about myself as a stone femme. in a very early post on this thread, i read a definition of a stone femme as either receiving, not giving, or not wanting to be touched sexually in certain ways. neither of these definitions apply to me! when i hear of stone femmes as "receiving, not giving", i really get angry! when with a stone butch, i AM giving just as much as i am receiving, only in a different way. first of all, let me say that in the past i have dated almost exclusively stone/tg/FtM butches. i go for that type of energy exchange. when with a Stone Butch, whether tg or not, i feel an exhilaration just to be with hym. i feel proud to be seen by hys side in public- a "this is who i am, this is who WE are"! this pulls at the inmost part of my femininity, my femme-ness. sexually, i adore being w/a stone butch. when i give myself to hym, it is as a precious gift, and the true ones know this and treat me as such. but this giving is NOT a passive "just lay there"! in my giving myself and getting hys energy, hys passion, hys tenderness, i give back mine in return. perhaps more subtly and in different ways than w/a non-stone butch. for example, i would never touch a stone butch in a feminizing way, and i find out beforehand where hys boundaries are. but i move with hys rhythm, i run my hands down hys back and body where appropriate, i wrap my legs around hym...and GO with hym! hys taking/my receiving go back and forth in a yin-yang flow that is the essence of the stone dance. i WANT hys taking me as hys gift. the energy is equal in quality but not in means. i don't want to touch a butch like hy touches me. (one BIG reason i'm a femme and a stone/transensual femme.) i am not a lipstick lesbian-i am a FEMME.
i hope that this makes some sense and helps put an end to the canard that stone femmes just receive. of course, this is just one queer stone femme's perspective. it is my truth. namaste, DamselFly i apologize for so many caps, but this is a subject that i get very passionate about!
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