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06-18-2011, 06:16 PM
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#1 |
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Senior Member
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Butch Preferred Pronoun?:
BadAss! / Sarcastic Bastard! 
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A femme always needs reassuring, it's not that she doesn't believe you....she just needs to know that she is still hot in your eyes.
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06-19-2011, 03:44 AM
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#2 |
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Member
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male identified butch Relationship Status:
Married 
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Location: Sweden
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I don't think I acctually have to say anything to my woman, my eyes say it all. And yes, I know she belives in them...
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"Vivamus, mea Lesbia, atque amemus"  |
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06-19-2011, 04:24 AM
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#3 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul. 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust
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Quote:
 But, it's true...I always know the compliment is sincere when I can see that glow in their eyes....regardless of who it is from. You know...there's a difference in "you look nice honey" and "YOU ARE GORGEOUS!" *Smiling*
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In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-19-2011, 04:28 AM
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#4 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul.
Join Date: Oct 2010
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Oh! And! It never hurts to change the compliments up from time to time.
I used to struggle with what to call my butch when she went to all sorts of trouble to look amazing..and I wanted her to know I noticed..and it worked! She ids female, so Handsome didn't feel right with her. Beautiful wasn't gonna cut it for her esteem. Finally, Striking rolled off my tongue..and it stuck. Now, I take my own advice and use other words, but I tend to stick to that safe middle ground where I don't feminize her (as a butch) and don't masculanize her (as a woman). So far, so good!  (does anyone find it interesting that "Feminize" is a word but "Masculanize" is not? And is my brain just too tired, or is there a better word out there??)
__________________
In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-19-2011, 05:01 AM
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#5 |
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Senior Member
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Country Boi Preferred Pronoun?:
call it as u see it Relationship Status:
Completely...complete ;)  Join Date: Aug 2010
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hmmmm ....feminize, womanize....but no male id 'ize' words...
Anyway....YES! Mix it up .... & u look good or fine is never enough. Hott, sexy, beautiful.....looking at her & asking if we HAVE to go...lol all work My favorite look on Sunshyne just gets a "can I just look at u?" Almost speechless response
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"You don't Find life worth living; You MAKE IT that way" |
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06-19-2011, 08:36 AM
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#6 | |
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Member
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cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce 
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Quote:
 when a simple you look amazing, awesome, delicious, breathtaking, terrific, lovely, etc. would do, and do much better.There is a difference between a compliment and reassurance. |
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06-19-2011, 10:34 AM
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#7 |
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Member
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Rainbow femme Preferred Pronoun?:
princess Relationship Status:
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I don't understand gendered compliments or insults. To me, everyone is equally beautiful or a slut
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It is not worth an intelligent person's time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that. |
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10-03-2011, 01:03 PM
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#8 | |
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Junior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Feminine Lesbian Woman Preferred Pronoun?:
just dont refer to me as a 'YOU PEOPLE' or say'HEY YOU' to me Relationship Status:
single 
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compliments
Quote:
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Intriguinglyours 
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06-19-2011, 02:55 PM
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#9 | |
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Member
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Femme Relationship Status:
rainbows! 
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Quote:
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06-19-2011, 04:20 PM
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#10 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
An Unwitting Thread Derailer! Preferred Pronoun?:
She, femme through and through Relationship Status:
She is my soul.
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: In a lil sparkle of fairydust
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I agree with all of the above, just simply stating that for my butch handsome nor beautiful were right.
__________________
In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed. Khalil Gibran Whatever you fear most has no power. It is your fear that holds the power.
-Oprah Winfrey |
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06-21-2011, 09:45 AM
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#11 | |
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Member
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cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce
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Quote:
Hiya Heart.... Your post made me think about how the use and misuse of language shapes our self-concept, and our understanding of ourselves in the world, in overt and covert ways. Gender training starts at birth. A zillion old and new studies confirm that: Boy and girl babies are spoken to and treated differently, described TO themselves differently, by care givers and the world around them. This profoundly affects self-perception; our understanding of who we are in a gendered world. I often wonder how I might have evolved had I not been tagged a "tomboy" in childhood. I suspect I would have been spared certain inorganic experiences and freed to explore others that were more organic to me. We become unwitting (if not witting) agents of dominant culture constructs/values when we use it's language to describe ourselves and one another. As always, thanks for the thought provoking post, Heart. |
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06-22-2011, 02:58 AM
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#12 | |
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Junior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Feminine Lesbian Woman Preferred Pronoun?:
just dont refer to me as a 'YOU PEOPLE' or say'HEY YOU' to me Relationship Status:
single
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Location: Folsom CA.
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Quote:
.gif "Say What?") But with an opinion.
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Intriguinglyours
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07-13-2011, 11:03 AM
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#13 | |
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Senior Member
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Butch Relationship Status:
Perusing Join Date: Nov 2009
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Quote:
is along the same lines as " butch's (and/or any gender id here) always need their ego stroked". Both make me feel queezy and I'm surprised I'm the first to say anything. True confidence to me, is an inside job. Not to mention, "always needs reassuring" makes femme's sound weak ,frail, insecure ,brainless and quite exhausting to be with or around. I hate the premise that any of us people here, are all the same. The If you've done one, you've done them all mentality get's my goat every time I see it. I'm so not an expert on all things femme because fortunately they are all so different and that in itself is THE MOST fascinating thing (to me) |
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07-14-2011, 07:55 AM
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#14 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
cisBUTCH Preferred Pronoun?:
hey Relationship Status:
Single - gave up the farce
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Location: New York
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Confident or not, we all need reassuring.
It's an inside job. |
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08-18-2011, 03:16 PM
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#15 | |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Girly girl femme Preferred Pronoun?:
She; Ma'am; Miss ;) Relationship Status:
Pitbull protected. Join Date: Apr 2011
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Quote:
But having the appearance of confidence does not mean that I am not having a bad day b/c of work/illness/traffic or a myriad of other reasons. And when the world gets to be overwhelming, a kind compliment-especially a unique one is much appreciated. Even confident people like to hear that someone admires a certain quality about them, especially when that person is someone whose opinion we value OR when it is a complete stranger. I went out a few years ago with a platonic friend of mine. We went to the local alt bar AFTER the party at the dungeon. It was easily 2 in the morning. But, as we were waiting to get in, she peered at me and said "your eyes look like works of art." She did not have to say that but she did and, despite her moving away, she will always have a special place in my heart. About a year prior to that, a woman ahead of me in post-Christmas returns line at Wal-mart (a place that I hate by the way) made my night with a compliment. She told me that my eyes look like polished glass or gemstones. She took a stressful/tiring situation & turned it into a fond memory. Never doubt the power of a compliment. 
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There are beauties who stop traffic and then there are beauties who grow obsessively in the hearts of the susceptible. |
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08-18-2011, 04:04 PM
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#16 |
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Member
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she/her Relationship Status:
Dates 
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Ya know....just as we ask the gentlemen to respect our femme space....
we should respect the Butch space. I'm not trying to be thread police BUT, it is marked BUTCH zone and alot of us ladies are in here telling our Butches what they should be talking about. Fair is fair.....just saying!
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 As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?? |
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08-18-2011, 04:09 PM
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#17 | |
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Member
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Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
PrincessPrettyPants, please. Relationship Status:
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If I read it correctly, I'm pretty sure that Merlin (OP) welcomed input from femmes. (post #2)
Quote:
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Red
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08-18-2011, 04:13 PM
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#18 |
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Member
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she/her Relationship Status:
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if thats the case, I appologize. I did not read all 64 posts. I read alot, and it was mostly femmes postings.
Sorry, as sorrys are do! ETA:...Yes, post two says femme please apply. my bad!
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As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?? |
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07-14-2011, 08:23 AM
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#19 | |
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Member
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Stonefemme lesbian Preferred Pronoun?:
I'm a woman. Behave accordingly. Relationship Status:
Single, not looking. Join Date: Jan 2010
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Cheryl |
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08-18-2011, 02:13 PM
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#20 | |
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Member
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Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?:
PrincessPrettyPants, please. Relationship Status:
Excellent.
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You were maybe the first one to say anything b/c I only now stumbeled upon this thread. I must agree, I was pretty icked-out at the notion that "a femme always needs reassuring". I don't mean to personally criticize the OP, but IMO, that statement was rather a gigantic generalization, and not a very favorable one (although I don't necessarily think that was the intent of the OP). Just my two cents.
Now tell me you love me and that I'm pretty. ("Prettiest" would be even better ...) Quote:
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Red
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Hybrid Mode
