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Old 07-05-2011, 06:15 PM   #1
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Call me crazy, but I think educating this boy on transgendering would be pretty far down in the developmental curriculum at this particular juncture. Especially with "hands-on" (meant figuratively) learning.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:18 PM   #2
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If it is part of his life on a day to day basis then I think educating the boy to understand would be a very good idea. But that of course is just my opinion.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:22 PM   #3
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That sounds great if anyone can figure out what is going on at all. But right now, you have an acute situation. It's about where this kid is. Before you can sit down and explain the larger picture, you have to help him deal with the fact that he's in a desperate spot now. Of course, the underlying problem there is that they didn't approach the bigger picture with maturity and sensitivity to begin with. But right now, he is not reachable that way.

And I just want to establish now that anything that comes out of my mouth is necessarily my opinion. That's why I don't find it necessary to remind everyone.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:24 PM   #4
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The obvious choice has not been made, not all parents know child is distraught, add transphobic thinking and now it's a huge gross mess. Poor kid!
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:40 PM   #5
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That sounds great if anyone can figure out what is going on at all. But right now, you have an acute situation. It's about where this kid is. Before you can sit down and explain the larger picture, you have to help him deal with the fact that he's in a desperate spot now. Of course, the underlying problem there is that they didn't approach the bigger picture with maturity and sensitivity to begin with. But right now, he is not reachable that way.

And I just want to establish now that anything that comes out of my mouth is necessarily my opinion. That's why I don't find it necessary to remind everyone.
Okay forgive me but from the original post.
"The poor kid is in the middle of full blown puberty and is having a huge problem with all of this. The furry wears a tale in public and the slave collar with a huge lock. The brother wears the key to the lock around his neck. It's embarrassing poor Nick and he doesn't want to go anywhere with his dad and the furry in public."

What I see is a kid embarrassed by his father and his current relationship. I am not sure this is acute or desperate and I do believe that sitting down with the child discussing things and educating him on different types of people in the world is not going to be damaging.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:19 PM   #6
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Call me crazy, but I think educating this boy on transgendering would be pretty far down in the developmental curriculum at this particular juncture. Especially with "hands-on" (meant figuratively) learning.


Why? Transpeoples exist, why shouldn't the child be educated? Everyone should know transgendered folks are out there, it's not harmful to any child.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:25 PM   #7
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Why? Transpeoples exist, why shouldn't the child be educated? Everyone should know transgendered folks are out there, it's not harmful to any child.
I'm talking about THIS child. See above. I tell my kid about everything. Even fetishes. (Maybe not all, but he sure knows some examples.) I tell it as it comes up, and sometimes preemptively.
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:28 PM   #8
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I'm talking about THIS child. See above. I tell my kid about everything. Even fetishes. (Maybe not all, but he sure knows some examples.) I tell it as it comes up, and sometimes preemptively.

Um Tapu I never gave your kid a thought, I was refering to OP's nephew not Tapu's kid, what's your deal?
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:36 PM   #9
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Um Tapu I never gave your kid a thought, I was refering to OP's nephew not Tapu's kid, what's your deal?
Huh? No, I meant where you said "children" need to learn about transgendering. I'm saying I totally agree and that mine does learn these things. But I'm saying that the general thing right for 'children" is not appropriate NOW in the situation with this child who is going to other relatives with his pain.

We're cool, I believe. Yes?
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:43 PM   #10
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Huh? No, I meant where you said "children" need to learn about transgendering. I'm saying I totally agree and that mine does learn these things. But I'm saying that the general thing right for 'children" is not appropriate NOW in the situation with this child who is going to other relatives with his pain.

We're cool, I believe. Yes?

Shit Tapu at this point I'm confused!!! Thanks for clarifying though
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Old 07-05-2011, 06:56 PM   #11
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Okie,
That age is very difficult. I’m sure the boy is embarrassed to deal with someone and something that is so out of the normal range of behavior. From the very limited amount of information you’ve provided, I would suggest discussing the issue with the mom and the dad. Maybe they can figure out what is really going on here.
It's just that your nephew is embarrassed to be seen with them, right? Maybe the child can openly discuss what’s going on with him. He can tell his dad he’s embarrassed and would rather not go out in public with them. Maybe his dad would make some concessions if he realizes how embarrassed and unprepared the child is to deal with this.
Would you be okay with your nephew spending time with the dad and partner if the child is okay with it?
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