Breaking up

Morgan · 08-27-2011, 11:16 PM

Thanks funkyfemme...I am glad this place is here. I am sorry for your pain, hugs as well to you.

funkyfemme · 08-27-2011, 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morgan

Thanks funkyfemme...I am glad this place is here. I am sorry for your pain, hugs as well to you.

I'm forever grateful for this space too. You have no idea!!! Hugs again!! It WILL get better!!!!!!!!!! It fuckin has to!!!!!

Leigh · 08-27-2011, 11:44 PM

I know bad the hurt is right after you break up with someone, especially if you really love the person and thought that they were supposed to be your forever. It takes time for things to heal, and its not an easy road, but it certainly does get better and the heart does mend ~ even if it doesnt seem like it now, it will get better that I promise each of you :-)

Quintease · 10-07-2011, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Matthew

I know bad the hurt is right after you break up with someone, especially if you really love the person and thought that they were supposed to be your forever. It takes time for things to heal, and its not an easy road, but it certainly does get better and the heart does mend ~ even if it doesnt seem like it now, it will get better that I promise each of you :-)

That.

The three years before my current partner were probably the worst of my life. Hurt, lonely, rejected, betrayed. I sought solace in a new relationship only to be abused.

Then out of nowhere this beautiful love fell out of the sky and we've just cemented it by getting married!!!!!

So it does get better ...eventually

ruby_woo · 12-27-2011, 02:33 PM

I feel bad blubbering all over the forum but I honestly don't where else to go. 8+ years is ending. I was 20 years old when we met. I'm now 29. I moved to Vancouver from San Francisco to be with her. I don't have friends here, my family is in Ohio.

I really thought we were going to be together forever. We were supposed to go to Disneyland, spend my 30th birthday together, and now it's not happening and I still can't believe it. We have to move out, obviously, find separate apartments. I don't even know how to find apartments in Vancouver. And how do you divide up 8 years worth of stuff together?

I love her, and she loves me, but says she can't give me what I need, she's changed, it'll be better for me. I don't know how something that hurts so badly can be better, but OK. I have a headache from crying so much. She still tries to hug and comfort me when I'm crying, but that's going to have to stop, obviously.

This sucks. I have no idea how I'm going to get through this.

Quintease · 12-27-2011, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I love her, and she loves me, but says she can't give me what I need, she's changed, it'll be better for me. I don't know how something that hurts so badly can be better, but OK. I have a headache from crying so much. She still tries to hug and comfort me when I'm crying, but that's going to have to stop, obviously.

This sucks. I have no idea how I'm going to get through this.

It does suck and please don't feel bad for looking for help from other people (((hugs)))

When my ex dumped me (5 years, new country, marriage certificate) she said 'You will thank me for this one day'. Of course I was devastated! She was leaving me while making out that she was doing this for me??

Ironically, though I doubted she really knew at the time, she was right. It took over 3 years but now I am in a much better and happier place, in a much better and more satisfying relationship.

You WILL get through this, purely as you have no choice. Just put one foot in front of the other and keep moving, keep doing what you have to do. It will hurt for a very long time, but one day you will wake up and realise you've done it, you've managed to move on.

Until then, try to look after yourself xxx

kittygrrl · 12-27-2011, 03:22 PM

so sorry this is happening to you..it's like losing a part of you and the immensity of that...no one can truly understand..unless you've been through it..I suggest don't prolong the pain get out as soon as you can..stuff (be damned) every piece will only serve to remind you what you've lost ..so everything you decide to keep, will remind you everytime you see or use it..do you really need that? my advise (in this situation) sell everything you can, give the rest away, and travel light (out of this toxic situation)..there is life after this but it's going to take awhile before you can recognize it and feel safe again.

08-27-2011, 11:44 PM	#3
Leigh Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, Her, etc Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Canada Posts: 7,767 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,029 Thanked 13,024 Times in 4,784 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	I know bad the hurt is right after you break up with someone, especially if you really love the person and thought that they were supposed to be your forever. It takes time for things to heal, and its not an easy road, but it certainly does get better and the heart does mend ~ even if it doesnt seem like it now, it will get better that I promise each of you :-) __________________ "When you fall off the wagon ... clutch the sides of it until you get a better grip!"

08-27-2011, 11:16 PM	#1
Morgan Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: she, her, hy, hym, does not matter Relationship Status: I am enjoying life.... Tournaments Won: 1 Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Arizona Posts: 643 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,753 Thanked 1,604 Times in 411 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Thanks funkyfemme...I am glad this place is here. I am sorry for your pain, hugs as well to you.

12-27-2011, 02:33 PM	#5
ruby_woo Member How Do You Identify?: queer femme Preferred Pronoun?: her/she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Vancouver, BC Posts: 427 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,848 Thanked 1,939 Times in 376 Posts Rep Power: 17615392	I feel bad blubbering all over the forum but I honestly don't where else to go. 8+ years is ending. I was 20 years old when we met. I'm now 29. I moved to Vancouver from San Francisco to be with her. I don't have friends here, my family is in Ohio. I really thought we were going to be together forever. We were supposed to go to Disneyland, spend my 30th birthday together, and now it's not happening and I still can't believe it. We have to move out, obviously, find separate apartments. I don't even know how to find apartments in Vancouver. And how do you divide up 8 years worth of stuff together? I love her, and she loves me, but says she can't give me what I need, she's changed, it'll be better for me. I don't know how something that hurts so badly can be better, but OK. I have a headache from crying so much. She still tries to hug and comfort me when I'm crying, but that's going to have to stop, obviously. This sucks. I have no idea how I'm going to get through this.

12-27-2011, 03:22 PM	#7
kittygrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: witchy Preferred Pronoun?: gf Relationship Status: Uranus will retrograde in Gemini Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: in the wild mushrooms Posts: 9,636 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,701 Thanked 22,134 Times in 7,205 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	so sorry this is happening to you..it's like losing a part of you and the immensity of that...no one can truly understand..unless you've been through it..I suggest don't prolong the pain get out as soon as you can..stuff (be damned) every piece will only serve to remind you what you've lost ..so everything you decide to keep, will remind you everytime you see or use it..do you really need that? my advise (in this situation) sell everything you can, give the rest away, and travel light (out of this toxic situation)..there is life after this but it's going to take awhile before you can recognize it and feel safe again.