The Fat Positive Lounge

[Soft*Silver]

Even tho I have lost alot of weight, I am still overweight by standards of the Cultural Norm. However, this is exactly where my body feels the most at ease and normal. So this is where I want to stay. I am somewhere between a 16 and an 18.

I have been told my surgery was a failure because I didnt get skinny.

even tho my surgery was NOT for weight loss, but to correct a life threatening hernia that compromised my lungs and my heart.

I can breath and I have much more stamina now and I am not getting chest pains and even my back issues are better because my body is not exhausted. I sleep better, and no longer have hallucinations (usually, lol) when i sleep. So...

my surgery was a failure?

[Soft*Silver]

My store opens May 1st. I have purchased my racks, all my ticket guns, registers, signages, etc. Well, BVR has and I have kicked in as much as I can. (Bureau of Vocational Rehab).

An extraordinary thing is happening. I am able to pick up the smaller store next to me. I am considering putting in a men's resale shop.

Immediately I am asked if its going to be for pudgy men. (I told you, i am hearing ALL the damn words)

I havent decided yet but I know I will carry larger clothes for men. My sub is a larger man. WAY larger. So yes, I will.

I get giggles over that. People have said they want to come and sit so they can see the customers come in.

Seriously?

Good lord, I had no idea what lurked in people's minds! I am seeing people that I thought I knew, in whole other lights! I will say most of the people saying these things are not close friends of mine but more acquaintances. But still, my one eyebrow goes up and my mouth twists sideways and i feel like a momma about to scold her bad child, when I hear shit like this...

[Soft*Silver]

I was going to do a modeling event, with several women wearing clothes from my shop. However, I had to cancel that because I am able to move my fixtures and the clothing into the store that week. It will be chaos. And i wont have the energy nor the focus to do both.

But while I was looking for models, I had people turn me down because they were not ok having people look at their bodies. It made me realize it wasnt the clothes that they thought were going to be featured, but their size.

In runways, models are suppose to be invisible, literally human hangers for the fashion.

but my models were saying THEY were the focus, and not the fashion.

Interesting...

and painful...

[Soft*Silver]

I hope I am allowed to do this..if not, please just delete this post. I dont want to break policy but I was hoping to offer my FB page for the store to those on BFP.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003486122806

[LeftWriteFemme]

[Soft*Silver]

I started bringing fixtures into the store. And a cash register. And signage. And mannequins. Oh lord. It is now REAL.

Did i get a chance to measure? No. Too much happening at one time today for me to concentrate on measuring a wall. I feel like my head is going to explode, how different this reality is.

I am really lucky to have so many people supporting me in this adventure. The woman i got the fixtures from is giving them to me to use before I pay for them! BVR will cut her a check but rather than wait for it, she said to just take them. This allows me to get the place started months before it would if I had to wait for BVR gov to process stuff.

I am sitting in the dark in rose cottage, feeling content, watching the light disappear outside while I type out words to people across the world. Life is good...

[Soft*Silver]

I am about to head out to get more fixtures, two more loads for sure. Thank heavens the dually truck bed is huge!

My house is so tore up..clothes, boxes, packaging materials, candles, signages, vases, etc all over the place for the store. I am feeling pretty overwhelmed that my house will never be cleaned again. I am one of those people that has to have things in their place and nothing is in it and there are many things in here now that dont have a place! LOL

I am setting up a web page soon too. I will be listing my inventory piece by piece and offering them for sale so people long distance can buy as well. And, take part in our online events. I plan on hosting some pretty incredible events with speakers and activities. Time to get the gals together! I also have a blogger who is going to be posting called "Chubby Girl". I love her wit and sense of self! And people are also gonna be able to purchase either steam punk or moody romantic jewelry from me, from two incredible local artists!

Am I still the same girl who was curled up on the couch last year and feeling like I would never have a purpose again?

I have to share with you, that there was one person on BFP that never left my side, never gave up on me, always stayed close and always believed in me. Without his help, i dont know what I would have done. I love him so much,and always will. Our friendship is as deep and rich as any i have ever had in my life. Imma gonna put a cowboy hat in a doorway so he can always be part of the blessings of my new store...

[nycfem]

I listened to this again (Thanks LWF) and appreciate the scientific pov so much. We do much needless damage to our minds, bodies, and souls by focusing on dieting and weight loss instead of focusing on being healthy if we want to be healthy. Furthermore, fat is a feminist issue, and women spend so much time together critiquing ourselves and sharing exactly what we are eating to further our weight loss all day. I was reading this great article

http://www.oprah.com/spirit/How-One-...ve-Being-Fat/1

and thinking about how much time is lost to dieting, especially for women. This is supposed to be a feminist site and yet women are congratulated for losing weight, whether that method is healthy or not. Women, for instance, go long periods eating 800 calories a day or even eat 500 calories a day while injecting themselves with a pregnancy hormone. We "thank" them, as long as they are losing weight. One reason that I started this thread is because of how I see "weight loss" being substituted for "health," which may or may not have weight loss as a side effect. I find it easy myself to fall into the "thinspiration" perspective and all the petting that one receives confessing to being "bad" with eating and all the accolades one receives losing any amount of weight. I'm really trying not to these days. As a feminist, this is something I feel strongly about. I know this is not the prevailing view on this site and that this thread is not a popular one, but I deeply appreciate those who have read and contributed. It doesn't matter to me whether people who come here are thin or fat or whether they are on a diet or not on a diet. I just like that there is any interest at all in a perspective that even considers that in our patriarchal culture we perpetuate an anti-woman, anti-fat bias by focusing so much time and energy and celebration of weight loss which we all too easily equate with "health."

Originally Posted by LeftWriteFemme

[LeftWriteFemme]