Butches and Body Image - Let's Talk About It

clay · 03-15-2012, 10:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StoneOne

I would give anything for a butch restroom ... as we change everyday becoming who we are suppose to be it gets harder to be part of the "public" vision . I could pass enough to use the mens restroom but ......that really does not feel right. I have not seen the family restroom as of yet but I will keep my eyes open. My guess is the "public" may view it as the mom with 5 kids and that would be a sight to see lmao as I go into use the restroom and there are 3 familys 14 kids saying mom why is that man in here?? Thanks for having my back on the stereotyped

this isuue does have its humor....at times...may as well see the sunny side of it, right? in SC there are also the "family" BR's. They generally only have two adult sized toilets and a smaller kiddie size toilet. So is only for one "family" use at a time..no room for 14 at once..lol..GA and Fla has them, and the rest areas along I 95 as well..they are awesome, and much cleaner! The ones here have kids' artworks on the tiles on walls and around toilets! They have a low sink and hand dryer for them...so Okie they are out there...and actually pretty clean. The truck stops with the restaurants have them...so are relaly clean for most part.

ruffryder · 03-15-2012, 11:08 AM

I mostly use the guys rest room. They give a shit less.. Ha ha! <not what I meant>
Less looks. Just shows guys don't really care whats all around them. Get in, do the damn business, get out. Should be that simple. Maybe its a good thing women are aware of their surroundings? ..with freaks in this world such as peeping toms..when I do choose womens restroom I do tend to get looks, people looking to make sure its womens room, someone saying excuse me you're in the wrong room, blah, blah, blah.. Be nice to have Trans restrooms I guess. I adore the ones with no female/male sign.

Turtle · 03-15-2012, 11:32 AM

...that over the years I have spoken with plenty of people who dramatically changed their personal presentation to the world (or in their home) at some time or another....and some have changed how they present many times.

For me, I so always felt like a boy when I was young, knew I wasn't a boy, wanted to be a boy, and did the best I could in my circumstance....I can hardly imagine what would have been different if I had gotten those tighty-whiteys and black high-tops ;-)

And as life went on and I made sense of things or rejected them I grew into the new a different me.

And I still am...

...this granbaby thing has kinda fucked with how male I feel. "Granpa" does not feel right, "granma" does...I am still working on making peace with that.

BUTCH? FEMME? I am definitely butch. I am definitely not femme. The rest of me is up for discussion...I like hearing ideas that are different and often better than mine - for me, it is not a crime to change my mind about something.

Some folks have told me they would like to post here and that they don't want to get jumped on. I sure wish people would feel like they can express their thoughts constructively here without fear of criticism.

Okiebug61 · 03-15-2012, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Turtle

... Some folks have told me they would like to post here and that they don't want to get jumped on. I sure wish people would feel like they can express their thoughts constructively here without fear of criticism.

I think whomever is wanting to post should do so. Each of our thoughts and ideas bring something different to the table. We will never all agree but dang it no one should feel threatened because of bully attitudes. So tell your folks to come over and participate in the conversation. I for one want to hear what they have to say.

ButchEire · 03-15-2012, 04:20 PM

My reaction to anyone who questions my presence in any restroom is to look them in the eye and say "excuse me?" My not-so-hidden meaning is to infer "Really? You have all the time in the world to worry about who is in the restroom?" After many years of ME getting embarrassed when I was younger, I decided that if someone indeed DID walk into the wrong restroom, who gives a f**k? Restrooms are there to get your business done and get out, not to socialize. Clearly also, it's UNLIKELY that someone would venture into the "wrong" restroom, so people are getting caught up in something that isn't probable.

Parker · 03-15-2012, 04:47 PM

Yeah, I dont give a fuck about people staring at me in the bathrooms anymore either. Hell, I have had women physically try to keep me out of the bathroom, thinking I was a man (I was about to offer to show her my tits when she realized her mistake and let me pass). Usually, I just ignore everyone, do my thing, and get out; but if they want to stare at me, I'll stare right back - after a pretty obvious look down at my rather large breasts for effect.

I am not male ID'd or trans &/or trying to pass, so I wouldnt use the men's bathroom unless it was the only one available &/or it was some sort of a bathroom emergency .... I dont want to spend time in their stinky, nasty bathrooms unless I absolutely have to!

Oh, and speaking of family bathrooms, the VA here has women, men, and unisex bathrooms all over the place - I think in large places and newly built places it might start becoming the "norm."

Queerasfck · 03-15-2012, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Parker

I am not male ID'd or trans &/or trying to pass, so I wouldnt use the men's bathroom unless it was the only one available &/or it was some sort of a bathroom emergency .... I dont want to spend time in their stinky, nasty bathrooms unless I absolutely have to!

I try to avoid the use of any public restroom whenever possible. I have to say I do believe women's restrooms can be just as nasty and unsanitary as men's restrooms.

~ocean · 03-15-2012, 04:51 PM

Us femmes have it soo easy , ((((((( hugs all of u butchs )))))))

your bodys r measured by a tailor (tailorette ) and ur mind is measured by ur soul : the soul is endless..

clay · 03-15-2012, 05:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~ocean

Us femmes have it soo easy , ((((((( hugs all of u butchs )))))))

your bodys r measured by a tailor (tailorette ) and ur mind is measured by ur soul : the soul is endless..

(((((((((((ocean)))))))))))))
Thanks for the hug...and your words....

apretty · 03-15-2012, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ~ocean

Us femmes have it soo easy , ((((((( hugs all of u butchs )))))))

it's not easy being femme, it's different but not easy.

Okiebug61 · 03-15-2012, 06:15 PM

The 2003 International Building Code requires that all new construction and substantial renovation for public restrooms include a family, or unisex, bathroom. Most new, large venues such as malls, airports, and sports arenas, now include at least one type unisex bathroom in addition to men's and women's public restrooms. But not all states have adopted the codes. Planning construction or renovation? Check your local public restroom regulations.

03-15-2012, 11:32 AM	#3
Turtle Senior Member How Do You Identify?: A mixity Preferred Pronoun?: whatever Relationship Status: chillin Join Date: Aug 2010 Location: in a really really cute little place Posts: 2,144 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,442 Thanked 4,529 Times in 1,220 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Would you believe... ...that over the years I have spoken with plenty of people who dramatically changed their personal presentation to the world (or in their home) at some time or another....and some have changed how they present many times. For me, I so always felt like a boy when I was young, knew I wasn't a boy, wanted to be a boy, and did the best I could in my circumstance....I can hardly imagine what would have been different if I had gotten those tighty-whiteys and black high-tops ;-) And as life went on and I made sense of things or rejected them I grew into the new a different me. And I still am... ...this granbaby thing has kinda fucked with how male I feel. "Granpa" does not feel right, "granma" does...I am still working on making peace with that. BUTCH? FEMME? I am definitely butch. I am definitely not femme. The rest of me is up for discussion...I like hearing ideas that are different and often better than mine - for me, it is not a crime to change my mind about something. Some folks have told me they would like to post here and that they don't want to get jumped on. I sure wish people would feel like they can express their thoughts constructively here without fear of criticism.

03-15-2012, 06:15 PM	#11
Okiebug61 Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Light Butch Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Hitched to Red Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 1,528 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,261 Thanked 5,378 Times in 1,245 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	The 2003 International Building Code requires that all new construction and substantial renovation for public restrooms include a family, or unisex, bathroom. Most new, large venues such as malls, airports, and sports arenas, now include at least one type unisex bathroom in addition to men's and women's public restrooms. But not all states have adopted the codes. Planning construction or renovation? Check your local public restroom regulations. __________________ "Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawake." ~ Anatole France

03-15-2012, 11:08 AM	#2
ruffryder Senior Member How Do You Identify?: FTM Preferred Pronoun?: guy ones Relationship Status: ... Join Date: May 2011 Location: chillin' in FL Posts: 3,690 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,951 Thanked 9,679 Times in 2,875 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	I mostly use the guys rest room. They give a shit less.. Ha ha! <not what I meant> Less looks. Just shows guys don't really care whats all around them. Get in, do the damn business, get out. Should be that simple. Maybe its a good thing women are aware of their surroundings? ..with freaks in this world such as peeping toms..when I do choose womens restroom I do tend to get looks, people looking to make sure its womens room, someone saying excuse me you're in the wrong room, blah, blah, blah.. Be nice to have Trans restrooms I guess. I adore the ones with no female/male sign.

03-15-2012, 04:20 PM	#5
ButchEire Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanent ban 3/17/2013 - TROLL Relationship Status: Partner to my best friend Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: For now, Buffalo Posts: 701 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,618 Thanked 1,872 Times in 485 Posts Rep Power: 0	My reaction to anyone who questions my presence in any restroom is to look them in the eye and say "excuse me?" My not-so-hidden meaning is to infer "Really? You have all the time in the world to worry about who is in the restroom?" After many years of ME getting embarrassed when I was younger, I decided that if someone indeed DID walk into the wrong restroom, who gives a f**k? Restrooms are there to get your business done and get out, not to socialize. Clearly also, it's UNLIKELY that someone would venture into the "wrong" restroom, so people are getting caught up in something that isn't probable.

03-15-2012, 04:47 PM	#6
Parker Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: Butch. Lesbian. Dyke. Woman. Female. Preferred Pronoun?: She, of course! Relationship Status: Content Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Small Town Life Posts: 2,880 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 7,858 Thanked 11,727 Times in 2,429 Posts Rep Power: 0	Yeah, I dont give a fuck about people staring at me in the bathrooms anymore either. Hell, I have had women physically try to keep me out of the bathroom, thinking I was a man (I was about to offer to show her my tits when she realized her mistake and let me pass). Usually, I just ignore everyone, do my thing, and get out; but if they want to stare at me, I'll stare right back - after a pretty obvious look down at my rather large breasts for effect. I am not male ID'd or trans &/or trying to pass, so I wouldnt use the men's bathroom unless it was the only one available &/or it was some sort of a bathroom emergency .... I dont want to spend time in their stinky, nasty bathrooms unless I absolutely have to! Oh, and speaking of family bathrooms, the VA here has women, men, and unisex bathrooms all over the place - I think in large places and newly built places it might start becoming the "norm."

03-15-2012, 04:51 PM	#8
~ocean Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme blows a kiss off my finger tips * Preferred Pronoun?: ~ hey girl ~ Relationship Status: ~ single & content ~ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Massachusetts ~coastal Posts: 7,905 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 22,958 Thanked 16,015 Times in 4,724 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Us femmes have it soo easy , ((((((( hugs all of u butchs ))))))) your bodys r measured by a tailor (tailorette ) and ur mind is measured by ur soul : the soul is endless..