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10-28-2012, 02:02 PM
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#1 |
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Member
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Male with interesting historical perspective Relationship Status:
Taking Applications 
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Good job, DMW -
And yes, let's make a point to take very good care to self-police and respect the TOS. |
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10-28-2012, 02:06 PM
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#2 |
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The Planet's Technical Bubba
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FTM Preferred Pronoun?:
He/Him/Geek Relationship Status:
Married to my forever! 
Join Date: Nov 2009
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My biggest vent right now is that there are times when I so could use an FTM around to talk to. I miss that part of NYC. Los Angeles is just too damned big and the fact that I don't have a driver license (ya.. I know! At 42 and traveling too much it's hard to focus on it enough), makes it that much harder. I feel disjointed and alone at times in regards to this. I never realized how much I missed this until the Reunion this fall.
My work colleagues are all supportive, yanno? but.. it's not the same. Sigh.
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10-28-2012, 02:10 PM
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#3 |
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Member
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FTM/Male (Will 14) Relationship Status:
Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012
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Seriously and ditto guys... i gotta apologize cause of my headache...i gotta take care of that. Just looking at the computer screen is getting to me.
I will come back later. I am glad you all are here. |
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10-28-2012, 02:11 PM
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#4 |
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Member
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Her Asshole. Preferred Pronoun?:
Him, hym, he, whatever. Relationship Status:
Bitch has no more excuses now. 
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Very much look forward to day when society will see me as I see myself but that just doesn't happen right now.
Am glad for this place and space cause I do'nt have any FTM friends irl to talk to about every day shit. Sucks but it's life. DMV, good thread. WIll post more later I'm sure. Brute. |
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10-28-2012, 02:16 PM
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#5 |
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Member
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Male with interesting historical perspective Relationship Status:
Taking Applications
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Brutal and Linus-
Hopefully this space will provide a starting point for guys who are available for other guys. We are misunderstood, often going through a lot of perceptual, physical, societal changes and are viewed with either suspicion or plain old misunderstanding. It's like Sisyphus pushing the boulder up the mountain always. We don't have cis-guys, we often don't have women, really only we can understand what happens to us, much of it completely NOT part of what we expected or foresaw when we started to transition or male-identify. I, for one, am always open for messaging and providing support. |
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10-28-2012, 02:38 PM
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#6 |
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Member
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Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012
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Linus, you mentioned school and i thought of a situation that came up and presented itself...a story on a lighter note...
I was in school in an anatomy lab class setting...and for some reason that i cannot recall at the moment in which the details are not really necessary for the gist.... The class needed a person to take their shirt off for ...i believe a telemetry unit with leads needing to be applied to my chest, inorder to measure the heart's electrical activity. and the girls in the class where comfortable with me and so they were like...come on... at first they just seemed to think that i would go ahead and offer myself for the position... and then they joked with me... and i wanted to do it...and i felt so badly for them because they didn't understand...after i didn't...i had to come up with some lame excuse of being too shy etc... i also, had to finally say...look my girl wouldn't want me to do show myself to you woman anyway...and that is kinda true too...cause they would flirt and boundaries are important..to protect them and my relationship...it was very uncomfortable for me... The sad thing is...there were only a few biomales in the class and one was heavy set and i wanted to save him from having to take off his shirt. I think the women just assumed i was going to cause i have the kind of body that is just bland or regular i guess. So, why wouldn't they? and they were probably thinking of the overweight guy also. trying to spare him the embarrassment. ...and the other...pissed me off that he didn't. Who knows...maybe he was trans like me. like us. Eventually, the heavy set guy took his shirt off and i thanked him vociferously and publicly for his bravery. I could tell he didn't want to and he was hesitant...god and his eyes...even he looked at me like bro why not? why can't you help me and just do this for me? I felt so badly about that. God i do now. I guess it isn't such a light note...i can laugh at myself in the situation now. But, it kinda describes our invisibility. Oh, see....i have scars from chest surgery that would be needed to be explained...i would be outing myself to the class...right there. and the professor...hot black woman...OMG...and the school. I just wanted to focus on learning...you know? I wouldn't be ashamed to out myself...just not necessary there...like that. We had to learn...not about me being FTM... Hugh...maybe one day...shirt comes off...oh, he is FTM...ok...continue the cardio lesson Last edited by DMW; 10-28-2012 at 02:58 PM. |
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10-28-2012, 02:54 PM
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#7 |
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Timed Out
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MALE Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
Working on myself, thank you 
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Hey guys,
Thanks for this space. I also am available to chat & or call....so msg me & we can go from there.
At 57 & having started this 12 years ago as far as the T & such..I can say I still miss having "guys like us" to talk to. I have some bio-male friends but I'm not "out" to them. I'm just recently divorced after a 10 year legal marriage to a wonderful woman. She was there for me through the changes & now...she's gone from me.....but, let's not go there. Anyway, I have never been "out" as it were. Old lifetime friends of course knew & have all accepted me....but, I never was really open with other folks. Especially not to new friends etc. I have come back to VA to heal from the divorce, & have found myself among a group of people that I AM safe with. No, I won't reveal to all of them cause it's not important...but, to some of them I have, & they have warmly welcomed me. That is SO GD refreshing. Now here's something I haven't encountered before though. One of my friends <God love her> is trying to fix me up with one of her gf's. She is straight as is her friend. the one trying to fix me up does NOT know the deal....so, I simply told her I'm not ready to date yet....which I'm not. Have any of you ever had this happen? I would love to go out & date but wow....when it comes time..<if it does> to take it further...YIKES ! I'm just allowing life to happen right now. I'm just trusting what happens will be ok. I am glad to be back on this site though....nice not to have to explain shit, you know? That shit in the other room pissed me off because. How dare ANYone put ANYne down for how they want to be in their own lives. I get so tired of being told I'm "wrong" or sexist for wanting to live with what many call "old fashioned beliefs", & yes...a woman who "wants" to treat me the way I want to be treated... Anyway, enough rambling.....anyone had a dating experience that they care to share? One w/ a straight woman? Jonathan |
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10-28-2012, 02:58 PM
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#8 | |
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Senior Member
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by my name Preferred Pronoun?:
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single
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Quote:
Jonathan I have found that being honest from the get go when I dated straight women really was the way to go . I found that if u list the benefit of being a transman really gets them and do it with humor Good luck |
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10-28-2012, 03:02 PM
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#9 | |
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The Planet's Technical Bubba
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Quote:
It's best to leave stuff from other threads in other threads and not drag them elsewhere.
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10-28-2012, 03:16 PM
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#10 | |
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Member
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Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012
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Quote:
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10-28-2012, 03:28 PM
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#11 | |
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Member
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Caught An Angel and she doesn't lie! Join Date: May 2012
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Quote:
Last edited by DMW; 10-28-2012 at 03:43 PM. |
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10-28-2012, 06:52 PM
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#12 | |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Male with interesting historical perspective Relationship Status:
Taking Applications
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In perpetual Wonder. And Western Mass.
Posts: 254
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I used to think this as well, and for the most part still feel that way - however, I've had TWO different occasions with doctors during an exam, in a very heavily trans-populated area - that had no idea when they saw my scars. They asked, I said "eh ... man-boobs" and both of their responses was "hmmm ... unusual, usually people who need that are overweight" -
Quote:
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10-28-2012, 07:05 PM
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#13 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Male with interesting historical perspective Relationship Status:
Taking Applications
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: In perpetual Wonder. And Western Mass.
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Thanked 753 Times in 187 Posts
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women!
I am interested in women, similarly to Darbonaire. I am less interested in how she identifies, outside of respecting it. If she's into me and vice versa, I could care less. I tend to be attracted in real life to straight women - then again, for the most part, those are the only ones I meet. I do have a faint memory of wanting a straight woman earlier in transition - not as a conquest or anything, but I see that then I wanted to be clear I was not "other" - I was male. Now, I think a queer femme or some iteration from the community would save a lot of time and effort - being understood on some fundamental level and not having to "teach".
I have not had to tell anyone that I am trans. I don't want to. I dread it. So I limit my own self when it comes to moving in the real world. I really don't know if I could handle the aftermath (embarrassment). But I am on some main stream dating sites, and after a long description of myself, I reveal that I am trans. I've had some interest from straight women, less from bi women. As far as an actual "meet", I had breakfast with a wonderfully geeky woman the other day and she seems very interested. I have to force myself to reach out to several women a week who interest me. The percentages of responses are dismal at best, but then again, most women are inundated. |
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10-28-2012, 02:33 PM
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#14 | |
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Senior Member
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by my name Preferred Pronoun?:
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single
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Quote:
anytime u need or want to talk let me know and I will send u my cell number and times to call |
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10-28-2012, 02:49 PM
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#15 |
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Senior Member
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In the 7 years since I started my journey I have had to learn that sometimes we have to be true to ourselves and the hell with what other ppl see or THINK they see or hear.
I started with 1 company and was with they till almost 2 yrs ago. They helped bybe accepting(which I didnt expect since its a southern company) and as I was progressing in my journey they moved me to b accepted more by other workers. I have worked with 2 other companies since I left the 1st company and NO one has questioned if Im a csi man or not. I do have to divulge the fact that I once I was known by another name cuz it is on professional background checks however I have found companies that wouldnt talk to me any longer after they found out I was transgender. It is their lost. My parents refused to talk to me for 7 yrs and while I was in the hospital this past September my mom called and I told her all I wanted and she agreed and since that time hasnt called me by my birth name. My biggest grip is whenever I call someone about something they call me maam. I correct them once and the next time its on. It only takes me telling them the second time and they stop calling me maam I did have that issue in the hospital where they kept calling me she even after being told repeatedly that it was SIR |
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10-28-2012, 03:15 PM
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#16 |
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Infamous Member
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Owned boy Preferred Pronoun?:
Hey boy!!! Relationship Status:
counting freckles slowly under Her direction!!! Join Date: Nov 2009
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Lack of FTM resources in my area is my biggest complaint right now. I miss team sports a lot and the last team I played on was an all mens rugby team back in the nineties. I also spend a lot of time on the water so finding guys that like to surf or paddleboard has been challenging.
I have to agree that honesty is the best policy. The straight women I have dated in the past and that I have to deal with today have and do appreciate my honest disclosures. It makes all things easier in the long run, The blind date is always the most fun to navigate.
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10-28-2012, 03:20 PM
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#17 | |
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Senior Member
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guy ones Relationship Status:
... Join Date: May 2011
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Quote:
This is one of my biggest vents too!  Resources!, yes! Where are the resources and FTM groups in the area. Sports, yes! How I would love to just stop by the park like when I was younger and just pick up a game of bball with the fellas. Now I wonder wth they will think not being bio male and older. Buddy, you and I need to get together and hit up the beach! It's long overdue and we're in the same damn state! 
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