Ask a trans person!

[Beloved]

Not trans here but I'm using Care Credit.

I applied and got accepted for $7200, 2 years no interest. Be careful. The interest can be very high. The statement will give you a minimum that is NOT the minimum for the promotion of no interest. If you pay that and not the amount you need to for no interest you will be charged interest (26%, I believe). Also, if you miss a payment you will be charged all the back interest. It's different than a credit card.

[SelfMadeMan]

Originally Posted by Beloved

Not trans here but I'm using Care Credit.

I applied and got accepted for $7200, 2 years no interest. Be careful. The interest can be very high. The statement will give you a minimum that is NOT the minimum for the promotion of no interest. If you pay that and not the amount you need to for no interest you will be charged interest (26%, I believe). Also, if you miss a payment you will be charged all the back interest. It's different than a credit card.

Yes, thank you for pointing that out Beloved! I hadn't even thought to mention the interest on Care Credit. It's one of the cards we pay off right away.

[Daywalker]

If it helps just one person, it's always worth the share


http://www.sacbee.com/2012/11/08/497...ansgender.html

[Linus]

Anyone here seen Still Black: a Portrait of Black Transmen : http://www.stillblackfilm.org/

I saw it referenced on Huff Post here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2584645.html

[ManOMan]

Originally Posted by Linus

Anyone here seen Still Black: a Portrait of Black Transmen : http://www.stillblackfilm.org/

I saw it referenced on Huff Post here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2584645.html

Thanks for the post.

I've never heard of this, but I'd like to see the whole thing. I think i'm going to buy it so if the opportunity comes up, I can show it at church. I'm still closeted there and so if/when I do come out, I don't want to be the only freakin' teaching tool...again...

[Breathless]

Thanks for sharing this!

Originally Posted by Linus

Anyone here seen Still Black: a Portrait of Black Transmen : http://www.stillblackfilm.org/

I saw it referenced on Huff Post here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2584645.html

[Daring_Dreamer]

I'm not sure where to post this. I'm sorry if this offends anyone. That is not my intention, I'm just looking for some advice. It's about my fiance. I'm using gender neutral pronouns, because that is what they are comfortable with right now. They are just starting to come out to me as trans, and I am the first person they have ever talked to about it. We are both in our 20's. The few times they have talked to me about it, it's only been at night when we are in bed and all the lights are out. I've been careful not to make a big deal out of it, and to let them know that I love them for who they are, not the body that they are born into, and that they are a good person, that what they are going through is not wrong, that there is nothing to be ashamed of. We are saving up for top surgery for them. Their family is very religious and conservative. My fiance came out as gay several years ago and their family has always been clear that they do not aprove. There is a trans support group where we live, but they are not comfortable talking to anyone else yet. While I love and support them completely, they need advice and support from someone who understands what they are going through, they need more than me. But since they are not ready to talk to anyone else yet, I'm wondering if there are any books that they can read that would help? Or any other advice?

[LoyalWolfsBlade]

Originally Posted by Daring_Dreamer

I'm not sure where to post this. I'm sorry if this offends anyone. That is not my intention, I'm just looking for some advice. It's about my fiance. I'm using gender neutral pronouns, because that is what they are comfortable with right now. They are just starting to come out to me as trans, and I am the first person they have ever talked to about it. We are both in our 20's. The few times they have talked to me about it, it's only been at night when we are in bed and all the lights are out. I've been careful not to make a big deal out of it, and to let them know that I love them for who they are, not the body that they are born into, and that they are a good person, that what they are going through is not wrong, that there is nothing to be ashamed of. We are saving up for top surgery for them. Their family is very religious and conservative. My fiance came out as gay several years ago and their family has always been clear that they do not aprove. There is a trans support group where we live, but they are not comfortable talking to anyone else yet. While I love and support them completely, they need advice and support from someone who understands what they are going through, they need more than me. But since they are not ready to talk to anyone else yet, I'm wondering if there are any books that they can read that would help? Or any other advice?

Hi Daring_Dreamer. First I want to commend you and say I would have killed for a girlfriend like you when I was in my 20s so don't sell your support of your fiance short. As for books I would recommend I have only found one I like and it is on the academic side, unfortunately most books about transgender are about the MTF side of our world. You could look on Amazon it tends to have a good selection and a wide variety.

However, I do agree that support from your own kind so to speak is important. If your fiance is still uncomfortable with telling people face to face may I suggest online support. I belong to a couple of online transgender and/or FTM groups where I can talk to the guys or get other resources. Then of course there is here. All the guys I have met are amazing and I think any support is better than none.

If you do find aa book I would like to know btw and if you are interested in the one that I liked let me know and I will be glad to share the title.

Alix

[Linus]

Originally Posted by Daring_Dreamer

I'm not sure where to post this. I'm sorry if this offends anyone. That is not my intention, I'm just looking for some advice. It's about my fiance. I'm using gender neutral pronouns, because that is what they are comfortable with right now. They are just starting to come out to me as trans, and I am the first person they have ever talked to about it. We are both in our 20's. The few times they have talked to me about it, it's only been at night when we are in bed and all the lights are out. I've been careful not to make a big deal out of it, and to let them know that I love them for who they are, not the body that they are born into, and that they are a good person, that what they are going through is not wrong, that there is nothing to be ashamed of. We are saving up for top surgery for them. Their family is very religious and conservative. My fiance came out as gay several years ago and their family has always been clear that they do not aprove. There is a trans support group where we live, but they are not comfortable talking to anyone else yet. While I love and support them completely, they need advice and support from someone who understands what they are going through, they need more than me. But since they are not ready to talk to anyone else yet, I'm wondering if there are any books that they can read that would help? Or any other advice?

I'm one of the fortunate ones to have a mostly supportive family. That said, I've heard that this book is a good starting point for many: [ame="http://www.amazon.com/Trans-Forming-Families-Mary-Boenke/dp/097972600X/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1368228257&sr=8-4"]Trans Forming Families: Mary Boenke, Delores Dudley, Lori Bowden: 9780979726002: Amazon.com: Books[/ame]

There are also a few online trans forums I can recommend if your partner would feel more comfortable with that (just private message me and I'll give you a link).

When I first began my transition, I joined a trans-masculine group (I was in NYC at the time) and it was one of the best things I could have done. I'd also suggest that you may want to find a support group for yourself as well. There are a few SOFFA (Significant Others, Friends, Families and Allie) groups out there as well. Although your partner is going through the transition, you will be impacted by it and the process and your feelings my surprise you. At the very least, knowing there are others experiencing similar as you can make a difference.

[WingsOnFire]

Originally Posted by Daring_Dreamer

I'm not sure where to post this. I'm sorry if this offends anyone. That is not my intention, I'm just looking for some advice. It's about my fiance. I'm using gender neutral pronouns, because that is what they are comfortable with right now. They are just starting to come out to me as trans, and I am the first person they have ever talked to about it. We are both in our 20's. The few times they have talked to me about it, it's only been at night when we are in bed and all the lights are out. I've been careful not to make a big deal out of it, and to let them know that I love them for who they are, not the body that they are born into, and that they are a good person, that what they are going through is not wrong, that there is nothing to be ashamed of. We are saving up for top surgery for them. Their family is very religious and conservative. My fiance came out as gay several years ago and their family has always been clear that they do not aprove. There is a trans support group where we live, but they are not comfortable talking to anyone else yet. While I love and support them completely, they need advice and support from someone who understands what they are going through, they need more than me. But since they are not ready to talk to anyone else yet, I'm wondering if there are any books that they can read that would help? Or any other advice?

I too want to commend you for your support of your fiance. I began my first relationship with a trans man four years ago. I had never even entertained the idea before that relationship. I have learned so much about myself and what a relationship with a trans person is like. It has been very rewarding but in the beginning I did struggle with what others would think or how to discuss it or if I even should.

So if you would like to ever talk please feel free to PM me. I think you have gotten great advice so far. Keep supporting your fiance and make sure to take care of yourself along the way.

Becca