Misogyny and Sexism in the News

[Kobi]

After working as a dental assistant for ten years, Melissa Nelson was fired for being too "irresistible" and a "threat" to her employer's marriage.

On Friday, the all-male Iowa State Supreme Court ruled that James Knight, Nelson's boss, was within his legal rights when he fired her, affirming the decision of a lower court.

"We do think the Iowa Supreme Court got it completely right," said Stuart Cochrane, an attorney for James Knight. "Our position has always been Mrs. Nelson was never terminated because of her gender, she was terminated because of concerns her behavior was not appropriate in the workplace. She's an attractive lady. Dr. Knight found her behavior and dress to be inappropriate."

For Nelson, a 32-year-old married mother of two, the news of her firing and the rationale behind it came as a shock.

The two never had a sexual relationship or sought one, according to court documents, however in the final year and a half of Nelson's employment, Knight began to make comments about her clothing being too tight or distracting.

"Dr. Knight acknowledges he once told Nelson that if she saw his pants bulging, she would know her clothing was too revealing," the justices wrote.

Six months before Nelson was fired, she and her boss began exchanging text messages about work and personal matters, such as updates about each of their children's activities, the justices wrote.

The messages were mostly mundane, but Nelson recalled one text she received from her boss asking "how often she experienced an orgasm."

Nelson did not respond to the text and never indicated that she was uncomfortable with Knight's question, according to court documents.

Soon after, Knight's wife, Jeanne, who also works at the practice, found out about the text messaging and ordered her husband to fire Nelson.

The couple consulted with a senior pastor at their church and he agreed that Nelson should be terminated in order to protect their marriage, Cochrane said.

On Jan. 4, 2010, Nelson was summoned to a meeting with Knight while a pastor was present. Knight then read from a prepared statement telling Nelson she was fired.

"Dr. Knight felt like for the best interest of his marriage and the best interest of hers to end their employment relationship," Cochrane said.

Knight acknowledged in court documents that Nelson was good at her job and she, in turn, said she was generally treated with respect.

"I'm devastated. I really am," Nelson said.

When Nelson's husband tried to reason with Knight, the dentist told him he "feared he would have an affair with her down the road if he did not fire her."

Paige Fiedler, Nelson's attorney, said in a statement to ABC News affiliate KCRG that she was "appalled" by the ruling.

"We are appalled by the Court's ruling and its failure to understand the nature of gender bias.," she wrote.

"Although people act for a variety of reasons, it is very common for women to be targeted for discrimination because of their sexual attractiveness or supposed lack of sexual attractiveness. That is discrimination based on sex," Fiedler wrote. "Nearly every woman in Iowa understands this because we have experienced it for ourselves."

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/abc-blog...opstories.html

[Corkey]

Can't control himself so she pays. Fucking Patriarchy.

[Kobi]

BOSTON (WHDH) -- Some local students think they've found a sweet solution to pay for college -- in the form of “sugar daddies.”

A new website aims to match "sugar daddies" with "sugar babies".

While some think it's a great idea to cut down on debt, others aren't so sure.

Students in Boston find themselves under the same crushing college debt load as kids all over the country. Some of them will look for jobs, or second jobs. Others are turning to a website where they can find benefactors advertised as boyfriends.

Answer a couple of questions, post your picture, and you could be just a couple of clicks away from finding a match made of cash.

The dating site “seekingarrangements.com” says its gaining popularity, especially with coeds struggling to pay for school.

“A lot of these girls grew up thinking college is going to be paid for and then when the recession happened they had to use their savings to stay afloat and now there's no college money for those girls,” said Jennifer Gwynn, “seekingarrangement.com”

“Seeking arrangements” lets singles find what they call a “sugar daddy” or “sugar momma.” The company says the average college aged sugar baby gets an allowance of about $3,000 per month -- that's for what it describes as a “mutually beneficial relationship.”

“We really believe this is a better way to pay for school,” said Gwynn.

“Seeking arrangements” claims to have 2 million users, it says 44 percent of them are college students, including some at BU and UMass.

“Given the expense of your colleges it doesn't surprise me that people are forced to end up doing things like this,” said one man.

“Sugar babies” can earn as much as $20,000 per month;more than enough to pay for books, loans, or even tuition.

But to most students, whatever the payout, it isn't worth the price.

“It sounds dangerous. I wouldn't do that. Wouldn't recommend it,” said one woman.

BU and UMass representatives told 7News they were not aware of any of their students participating with the site.

http://www1.whdh.com/news/articles/l...h-benefactors/
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Sometimes there just arent any words.

[DapperButch]

My first thought when reading the above article is that gay men have been doing this forever.

The site is set up for all combination of sexes, with sugar daddys, sugar mommas, sugar male babies, and sugar female babies. Straight and gay.

[Greyson]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

My first thought when reading the above article is that gay men have been doing this forever.

The site is set up for all combination of sexes, with sugar daddys, sugar mommas, sugar male babies, and sugar female babies. Straight and gay.

Sorry but the article really pushed my buttons. One of my first thoughts is yet more enabling of spineless "I am too special, smart, talented and beautiful to be expected to live among the mortals."

I live in an area full of well intentioned middle class liberals who are clueless and raised to believe they are open hearted, fair minded and not racist. They could not do an honest day of work or find their way out of a paper bag if their life depended on it.

College fees, tuition are rediculious. Guess what? It has been this way for generations for many. So now that it is in the back yard of the little darlings, it is a problem? Gawd forbid they might have to get a job or take the bus instead of daddy's old car.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Greyson

Sorry but the article really pushed my buttons. One of my first thoughts is yet more enabling of spineless "I am too special, smart, talented and beautiful to be expected to live among the mortals."

I live in an area full of well intentioned middle class liberals who are clueless and raised to believe they are open hearted, fair minded and not racist. They could not do an honest day of work or find their way out of a paper bag if their life depended on it.

College fees, tuition are rediculious. Guess what? It has been this way for generations for many. So now that it is in the back yard of the little darlings, it is a problem?

Well, when I went to the site I didn't see anything about it being a paying for college type of thing, so it seems to me that the article is making the assumption that this is what the site is mainly used for. But, it is not like I read further into it.

I took a look at the site after I read the article and it seems to be also used as just a regular personals site. Many of the "sugar mommas" make around 40K per year, so I don't see how they plan to spend $1,000-$3,000 for their "sugar male babies". Some of them are also in their 20's.

However, I didn't join the site, so maybe they mention the college thing, I don't know.

Really, this stuff already goes on on personal sites, anyway. People searching for wealthy people to help take care of them. The difference is this site gives one location for those people.

So, for me, when I read the article it pushed my buttons, but when I looked at the site and saw how it was a level playing field between the sexes, it "pushed my buttons less", so to speak.

[Greyson]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Well, when I went to the site I didn't see anything about it being a paying for college type of thing, so it seems to me that the article is making the assumption that this is what the site is mainly used for. But, it is not like I read further into it.

I took a look at the site after I read the article and it seems to be also used as just a regular personals site. Many of the "sugar mommas" make around 40K per year, so I don't see how they plan to spend $1,000-$3,000 for their "sugar male babies". Some of them are also in their 20's.

However, I didn't join the site, so maybe they mention the college thing, I don't know.

Really, this stuff already goes on on personal sites, anyway. People searching for wealthy people to help take care of them. The difference is this site gives one location for those people.

So, for me, when I read the article it pushed my buttons, but when I looked at the site and saw how it was a level playing field between the sexes, it "pushed my buttons less", so to speak.

Dapper, thanks for digging deeper. I am not against women making ends meet, raising their standard of living, spending their money however they choose among consenting adults. What rubs me the wrong way is when women, men and any other gender believes are entitled to something. Although the article does not speak directly to "entitlement" for me, it pushes that button.

In the media the discussion of entitlement is usually about "minorities." What is glossed over is the reality of middle class, upper middle class and cooperate entitlements. IMO, many are born into it and do not even realize their world is full of entitlement, privlege.

[Kobi]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

My first thought when reading the above article is that gay men have been doing this forever.

The site is set up for all combination of sexes, with sugar daddys, sugar mommas, sugar male babies, and sugar female babies. Straight and gay.

I didnt visit the site to see all the available options.

Some people might see this as an example of capitalism in action, fitting a need that is mutually beneficial to both parties.

Some might see this as an example of human exploitation.

I dunno.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Kobi

I didnt visit the site to see all the available options.

Some people might see this as an example of capitalism in action, fitting a need that is mutually beneficial to both parties.

Some might see this as an example of human exploitation.

I dunno.

I guess I kind of see it as both. I have mixed feelings about Hooters, too, but seem to lean more towards viewing it is exploitation since it is most often very young women. Of course, the women who work there may be insulted by my feeling that way.

[Soon]

School Tells 13-Year-Old That She Should Get a Breast Reduction to Combat Bullying



"It makes me feel like now you are telling me it's my fault, it's God's fault the way he made her. The lady on the phone said they could transfer my daughter and said her boobs were so large she will always get teased. And the only suggestion she had for me is to have my daughter get a breast reduction," said Jackson.