The Femme Continuum: The "Highs" and "Lows" of Visibility

[The_Lady_Snow]

The descriptors you used in the post to *me* are assigned markers of hierarchy... Femme has no High ----- Low, we- just are. For me it's my gender so..... I can't and won't fall into the trap of assigning "value" to Femme. I'd like to address the stuff about Femmes of Color and our experiences but I'll take the chance and be transparent and say I'm not comfortable cause there was some hostility in the posts regarding a WOC's perception about race/identify/gender/Femme...


Candy, I'm going to come back after work and share my experience as a Femme who chose to live with a cis gender man and the trials of holding on to Femme

Hang in there sister!

Originally Posted by Chancie

It's almost three years later, and

I have come to feel a strong distaste for adjectives preceding the word 'femme'.

1. high
2. completely
3. ultra
4. real
5. true
6. natural
7. pure

I'm sure there are a few others that trouble me.

I understand that some members use those words as shorthand, but they raise my hackles.

What meaning are those adjectives intended to convey?

[candy_coated_bitch]

Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow

The descriptors you used in the post to *me* are assigned markers of hierarchy... Femme has no High ----- Low, we- just are. For me it's my gender so..... I can't and won't fall into the trap of assigning "value" to Femme. I'd like to address the stuff about Femmes of Color and our experiences but I'll take the chance and be transparent and say I'm not comfortable cause there was some hostility in the posts regarding a WOC's perception about race/identify/gender/Femme...


Candy, I'm going to come back after work and share my experience as a Femme who chose to live with a cis gender man and the trials of holding on to Femme

Hang in there sister!

Snowy, I would really appreciate hearing anything you have to say.

I am sorry that the environment here feels too hostile to you to be able to speak to your experience as a woman of color. I ALWAYS get kind of concerned when a conversation about race only includes the perspective of white folks, and I did have that concern here. For the record, I would welcome your perspective on that but also understand if you don't feel able to share it.

I don't intend to come across as hostile towards Femmes of color--I am hostile towards that picture LOL. What irks me about her opinion around the intersections of race and Femme, is that for me personally I don't believe that the privileges I access that Femmes of color don't have much to do with my femininity. It has way the hell more to do with my whiteness.

But, I know that lived experience is never simple and we can't really parse out the boxes we fit into in the world. If there is something we are missing around the intersections of race and Femme--I think your opinion would be invaluable.