Lesbian Couple "Looks into Transgender" as a Loophole to Get Married

Corkey · 07-15-2014, 02:04 PM

I'm wondering if folks are gate keeping. Personally I will never make the transition, the physical for me does not make the person (gender) I am. I am Transgender, not Transexual. I do think it was expedient for Jacki to further their relationship. That isn't a judgement on if Jacki is TG or not. Carpe Diem may be at play here. Love is all that matters and it is time we stop making people jump through hoops just so they can marry the person they love. Then everyone would be able just to be themselves without society getting say in their lives.

.10.

imperfect_cupcake · 07-15-2014, 04:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Corkey

I'm wondering if folks are gate keeping. Personally I will never make the transition, the physical for me does not make the person (gender) I am. I am Transgender, not Transexual.

Thanks. I was reading this thinking... Hang on... Everyone is talking about Transexual transition, not being transgendered.... Transgender... You can be female and just not a woman. And I knew plenty of trans*gender* in the UK who still ID'd as dyke as a secondary ID.

It actually makes my left eye twitch when people conflate the two as being the same.

dykeumentary · 07-15-2014, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeybarbara

Thanks. I was reading this thinking... Hang on... Everyone is talking about Transexual transition, not being transgendered.... Transgender... You can female and just not a woman. And I knew plenty of trans*gender* in the UK who still. IDd as a dyke as a secondary ID.

It actually makes my left eye twitch when people conflate the two as being the same.

Did you come across how the person on Oprah identifies themselves? We should use the term they use.
If we are talking about interrupting the oppression of gender non-conforming people, does it help to separate support for transgender people from transsexual people?

imperfect_cupcake · 07-15-2014, 05:19 PM

That's not what I am referring to, that is a strawman argument in regards to my post.

dykeumentary · 07-15-2014, 05:21 PM

What are you referring to? I'd love to know what you're thinking!
If it's the Oprah show producers who don't know the difference, I'm not surprised.

imperfect_cupcake · 07-15-2014, 05:23 PM

That it's irritating when people in general and the media confuse transgender with Transexual and confuse that again with sexual desire. It makes life more difficult for people when people think sex and gender are the same.

dykeumentary · 07-15-2014, 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by honeybarbara

That it's irritating when people in general and the media confuse transgender with Transexual and confuse that again with sexual desire. It makes life more difficult for people when people think sex and gender are the same.

I like your brain.
Dammit though- I was kinda hoping we'd fight, so then we could make up...

BrutalDaddy · 07-15-2014, 05:28 PM

I don't know if this couple chose to go this route strictly based off "loophole" or if there were past thoughts/desires to transition and so this "loophole" provided the perfect opportunity to do so. I don't know if this couple intentionally realized the back lash that could/would stem from their decision to use the "loophole" to their advantage. I don't even know exactly how I feel about this yet.

What I do know is this. My first thought had to do how the same "scenario" has been played out for the argument against gay marriage. By this I'm speaking of the argument that gay people should not be allowed to legally marry because god had ordained marriage between a bio male and bio female so that they may procreate. This argument/scenario has been played out in front of judges all over this nation. First time I ever heard it all I could think about were all the heterosexual couples out there who, for whatever reason, could not have children.

I guess where I'm going with this is, whether intentional or unintentional, the couples' actions could/can undermine the struggles of others (transgenders and transsexuals) within that same umbrella. Just as the hard core religious organizations actions to ban gay marriage could/can undermine the struggles of those within their umbrella (heterosexual couples unable to give birth "the way god intended").

Amazing to me how two "groups", so vastly different in beliefs, could possibly parallel each other in their mission(s), not realizing (or maybe they do but don't care), how much it could affect those around them. Granted, the couple isn't a "group" but merely two people looking for a way to be considered legally married in the eyes of the law but who's to say others won't follow suit? If it worked for them, it could work for others.

It can be viewed as follows....if masculine person of that couple transitioned only to be able to legally get married yet has no desire to be a man then that can undermine the serious struggle, grief, confusion, pain that a person who transitions goes through and also the way society views transgender/transsexual. Basically that transgender/transsexual really isn't that serious of an issue so dismiss it. Same for the organized religion argument that undermines heterosexual couples who can not procreate because their argument essentially says they can't marry either or shouldn't be married.

Anyway, this ramble may have gotten off topic but the thought kept bugging me and I knew if I didn't get it out of my head, it'd stay there. So figured I'd make y'all suffer with my musings.

That's All,
Brute.

07-15-2014, 02:04 PM	#1
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,268 Times in 6,637 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	I'm wondering if folks are gate keeping. Personally I will never make the transition, the physical for me does not make the person (gender) I am. I am Transgender, not Transexual. I do think it was expedient for Jacki to further their relationship. That isn't a judgement on if Jacki is TG or not. Carpe Diem may be at play here. Love is all that matters and it is time we stop making people jump through hoops just so they can marry the person they love. Then everyone would be able just to be themselves without society getting say in their lives. .10. __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee)

07-15-2014, 05:21 PM	#5
dykeumentary Member How Do You Identify?: butch dyke Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: NJ Posts: 449 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 341 Thanked 1,548 Times in 359 Posts Rep Power: 19160663	What are you referring to? I'd love to know what you're thinking! If it's the Oprah show producers who don't know the difference, I'm not surprised. __________________ The Origins of Butch & Femme (a retelling): https://youtu.be/U7VkXpZl4Mk Watch more of my funny butch/femme movies here: https://www.youtube.com/dykeumentary1

07-15-2014, 05:19 PM	#4
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	That's not what I am referring to, that is a strawman argument in regards to my post.

07-15-2014, 05:23 PM	#6
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,712 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	That it's irritating when people in general and the media confuse transgender with Transexual and confuse that again with sexual desire. It makes life more difficult for people when people think sex and gender are the same.

07-15-2014, 05:28 PM	#8
BrutalDaddy Member How Do You Identify?: Her Asshole. Preferred Pronoun?: Him, hym, he, whatever. Relationship Status: Bitch has no more excuses now. Join Date: May 2012 Location: Lower Alabama Posts: 519 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 206 Thanked 2,784 Times in 499 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	I don't know if this couple chose to go this route strictly based off "loophole" or if there were past thoughts/desires to transition and so this "loophole" provided the perfect opportunity to do so. I don't know if this couple intentionally realized the back lash that could/would stem from their decision to use the "loophole" to their advantage. I don't even know exactly how I feel about this yet. What I do know is this. My first thought had to do how the same "scenario" has been played out for the argument against gay marriage. By this I'm speaking of the argument that gay people should not be allowed to legally marry because god had ordained marriage between a bio male and bio female so that they may procreate. This argument/scenario has been played out in front of judges all over this nation. First time I ever heard it all I could think about were all the heterosexual couples out there who, for whatever reason, could not have children. I guess where I'm going with this is, whether intentional or unintentional, the couples' actions could/can undermine the struggles of others (transgenders and transsexuals) within that same umbrella. Just as the hard core religious organizations actions to ban gay marriage could/can undermine the struggles of those within their umbrella (heterosexual couples unable to give birth "the way god intended"). Amazing to me how two "groups", so vastly different in beliefs, could possibly parallel each other in their mission(s), not realizing (or maybe they do but don't care), how much it could affect those around them. Granted, the couple isn't a "group" but merely two people looking for a way to be considered legally married in the eyes of the law but who's to say others won't follow suit? If it worked for them, it could work for others. It can be viewed as follows....if masculine person of that couple transitioned only to be able to legally get married yet has no desire to be a man then that can undermine the serious struggle, grief, confusion, pain that a person who transitions goes through and also the way society views transgender/transsexual. Basically that transgender/transsexual really isn't that serious of an issue so dismiss it. Same for the organized religion argument that undermines heterosexual couples who can not procreate because their argument essentially says they can't marry either or shouldn't be married. Anyway, this ramble may have gotten off topic but the thought kept bugging me and I knew if I didn't get it out of my head, it'd stay there. So figured I'd make y'all suffer with my musings. That's All, Brute.