Caregivers and Stress

Kelt · 04-05-2016, 07:25 PM

Whew! Taxes.

Just short of a year ago in a huge karmic swipe, my father died on tax day. You had to know him to get that, but to say it was ironic is a major understatement in a Monty Python kind of way...

Today the E-file happened, 7 federal and 2 state tax returns filed and the only one of them that needed a 90 day extension (estate) was also completed. While I'm no accountant, I was the one who rescued the three carloads of paperwork and brought it all back to my place for sorting so that I could spend the last six months looking for and providing the answers to the endless stream of questions from 3 accounting firms.

I can breathe again.

Well, for a month or so anyway. There are other legal things afoot, but for me this was the big day, I couldn't stand the though of a bunch of extensions dragging this out forever and it actually got done!

I know it doesn't really sound like a caregiver stress, but this was background music to a host of issues with my mother's practical needs and the fact that she has both dementia and now cancer too; an interesting mix since she keeps forgetting she has cancer.

For the best I suppose. I'm on a learning curve with each passing month or so presenting a new puzzle to solve. What has she forgotten to do? How do I fix that from where I am? Does she even know she forgot how to do something? Or, did she just stop doing it?

I'm incredibly lucky in that I have found some really good "on ground" caregiver help and her RN is in a position to hire and manage other care providers to spot changes and help her with things that need helping with. (An ever changing menu)

I dunno where this is going... I'm just glad the taxes are done and Mom is safe.

04-05-2016, 07:25 PM	#11
Kelt Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Beach Butch Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: SoCal Posts: 2,751 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 19,765 Thanked 15,279 Times in 2,538 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Whew! Taxes. Just short of a year ago in a huge karmic swipe, my father died on tax day. You had to know him to get that, but to say it was ironic is a major understatement in a Monty Python kind of way... Today the E-file happened, 7 federal and 2 state tax returns filed and the only one of them that needed a 90 day extension (estate) was also completed. While I'm no accountant, I was the one who rescued the three carloads of paperwork and brought it all back to my place for sorting so that I could spend the last six months looking for and providing the answers to the endless stream of questions from 3 accounting firms. I can breathe again. Well, for a month or so anyway. There are other legal things afoot, but for me this was the big day, I couldn't stand the though of a bunch of extensions dragging this out forever and it actually got done! I know it doesn't really sound like a caregiver stress, but this was background music to a host of issues with my mother's practical needs and the fact that she has both dementia and now cancer too; an interesting mix since she keeps forgetting she has cancer. For the best I suppose. I'm on a learning curve with each passing month or so presenting a new puzzle to solve. What has she forgotten to do? How do I fix that from where I am? Does she even know she forgot how to do something? Or, did she just stop doing it? I'm incredibly lucky in that I have found some really good "on ground" caregiver help and her RN is in a position to hire and manage other care providers to spot changes and help her with things that need helping with. (An ever changing menu) I dunno where this is going... I'm just glad the taxes are done and Mom is safe.