Butch/Butch Theory

Angeltoes · 02-19-2016, 05:08 PM

I don't think it's always a case of internalized homophobia. Some femmes may pout about the butch/butch dynamic for the simple reason that they're jealous. It means fewer butches available to them, especially if they find the butches involved to be attractive. It's hard to find a partner and it's easier to pass the blame for that by saying 'no wonder I can't find a partner when all the butches are being taken by other butches!" I have had brief moments where I felt that way. I know it's dumb and selfish, but I'm human. I always come to my senses, because we all need to find love and happiness. Life's too short to worry about other people's expectations.

kittygrrl · 02-19-2016, 11:26 PM

I think it's hot...everybody deserves to be happy

Angeltoes · 02-20-2016, 12:06 AM

I said we all need love, because whether we deserve it depends on the individual. Clearly not everyone deserves love, because some people don't behave in lovable ways. If they do behave well but never find love, then whose fault is it that they didn't get what they deserved? God's fault? Society's fault? There's no point in walking around thinking we didn't get what we deserved.

It's one thing to say that love is a need. It makes little sense to say that love is something we 'deserve.' We don't always get our needs met in life and sometimes we have make up for that in other ways.

kittygrrl · 02-20-2016, 12:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angeltoes

I said we all need love, because whether we deserve it depends on the individual. Clearly not everyone deserves love, because some people don't behave in lovable ways. If they do behave well but never find love, then whose fault is it that they didn't get what they deserved? God's fault? Society's fault? There's no point in walking around thinking we didn't get what we deserved.

It's one thing to say that love is a need. It makes little sense to say that love is something we 'deserve.' We don't always get our needs met in life and sometimes we have make up for that in other ways.

"little sense to say that love is something we deserve" hmm well that is an interesting point of view, however, there are all kinds of love in this world, romantic love is only one kind..

Angeltoes · 02-20-2016, 02:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kittygrrl

"little sense to say that love is something we deserve" hmm well that is an interesting point of view, however, there are all kinds of love in this world, romantic love is only one kind..

True. I was just thinking the same thing. Some people are aromantic and don't even want romantic love.

kittygrrl · 02-20-2016, 02:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angeltoes

True. I was just thinking the same thing. Some people are aromantic and don't even want romantic love.

yes! very true...I have two sisters. Each have decided to be celibate and have been for more then 10 years and yet they have lives which are rich in all kinds of love..they are happy and there is no lack..they are awesome

imperfect_cupcake · 02-20-2016, 05:16 PM

I know asexually who are sexually celibate but still have romantic relationships.

There are people who desire sexual love but not romantic.

The ancient Greeks had six different words for different types of love, some of which I think some people based on their cultural/religious background wild not consider love at all, but I think it would be better to be more specific about the kind of love one desires as we all express and want different kinds of love. In my opinion, we for us far too much on one kind "Eros" as being the kind of partnership love to have with others outside of non-sexual love.

We seperate them. Put them in piles. No sex with friends, that's wrong, for example.

It's amazing how much I have to say about things when I'm studying for board exams...
Back to work...

02-19-2016, 05:08 PM	#1
Angeltoes Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Nunya Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Bernlandia Posts: 1,740 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,286 Thanked 5,526 Times in 1,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	I don't think it's always a case of internalized homophobia. Some femmes may pout about the butch/butch dynamic for the simple reason that they're jealous. It means fewer butches available to them, especially if they find the butches involved to be attractive. It's hard to find a partner and it's easier to pass the blame for that by saying 'no wonder I can't find a partner when all the butches are being taken by other butches!" I have had brief moments where I felt that way. I know it's dumb and selfish, but I'm human. I always come to my senses, because we all need to find love and happiness. Life's too short to worry about other people's expectations. __________________ Now say you're sorry for ushering in the fourth fucking reich- anonymous

02-20-2016, 12:06 AM	#3
Angeltoes Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Nunya Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: Bernlandia Posts: 1,740 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,286 Thanked 5,526 Times in 1,386 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	I said we all need love, because whether we deserve it depends on the individual. Clearly not everyone deserves love, because some people don't behave in lovable ways. If they do behave well but never find love, then whose fault is it that they didn't get what they deserved? God's fault? Society's fault? There's no point in walking around thinking we didn't get what we deserved. It's one thing to say that love is a need. It makes little sense to say that love is something we 'deserve.' We don't always get our needs met in life and sometimes we have make up for that in other ways. __________________ Now say you're sorry for ushering in the fourth fucking reich- anonymous

02-19-2016, 11:26 PM	#2
kittygrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: witchy Preferred Pronoun?: Fae Relationship Status: just for fun Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: near the wild mushrooms Posts: 9,403 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 21,608 Thanked 21,978 Times in 7,093 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	I think it's hot...everybody deserves to be happy

02-20-2016, 05:16 PM	#7
imperfect_cupcake Senior Member How Do You Identify?: feminine dolly dyke Preferred Pronoun?: Your Grace Relationship Status: I put my own care first Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: In a gauze of mystery Posts: 1,776 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,426 Thanked 9,710 Times in 1,611 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I know asexually who are sexually celibate but still have romantic relationships. There are people who desire sexual love but not romantic. The ancient Greeks had six different words for different types of love, some of which I think some people based on their cultural/religious background wild not consider love at all, but I think it would be better to be more specific about the kind of love one desires as we all express and want different kinds of love. In my opinion, we for us far too much on one kind "Eros" as being the kind of partnership love to have with others outside of non-sexual love. We seperate them. Put them in piles. No sex with friends, that's wrong, for example. It's amazing how much I have to say about things when I'm studying for board exams... Back to work...