Negotiating Silence

[SuperFemme]

Originally Posted by NJFemmie

I've witnessed "silencing" usually when someone tries to proclaim something as "wrong". Things may be wrong to (collectively speaking) you - but if you don't agree with something, find it useful or pertinent to YOU, it doesn't make it wrong for someone else.

I suppose it's human nature to attempt to convince others of one's own beliefs. The end result is usually silence or the feeling of alienation.

You bring up a most excellent point twisty lime! Silence = Alienation. In reading through this thread I am getting the sense that this a truth for some.

How can we negotiate this is my question? How as individuals can we not alienate each other?

[NJFemmie]

Originally Posted by SuperFemme

You bring up a most excellent point twisty lime! Silence = Alienation. In reading through this thread I am getting the sense that this a truth for some.

How can we negotiate this is my question? How as individuals can we not alienate each other?

I suppose negotiations could start by not stating that something is WRONG. No one wants to hear that just as much as the person who is trying to convince that their way is the right way. There is no right or wrong way when it comes to other people's feelings - opinions however - are loaded guns.

The key to tolerance and understanding is remembering that if it doesn't suit you - leave it alone. The beauty of a community is knowing that there are others out there who feel and think the way you do (to some degree). It isn't necessary to recruit others to YOUR (the collective) way of thinking.

[SuperFemme]

Originally Posted by NJFemmie

I suppose negotiations could start by not stating that something is WRONG. No one wants to hear that just as much as the person who is trying to convince that their way is the right way. There is no right or wrong way when it comes to other people's feelings - opinions however - are loaded guns.

The key to tolerance and understanding is remembering that if it doesn't suit you - leave it alone. The beauty of a community is knowing that there are others out there who feel and think the way you do (to some degree). It isn't necessary to recruit others to YOUR (the collective) way of thinking.

My name is adele and I am so NOT here to recruit you! (sorry, couldn't resist)

This is a great post! I wonder if people equate everyone not agreeing with them to not being heard? Then it all goes to hell in a handbasket. The thing is, on the other side of the coin that is not being heard is not listening. Listening means extracting ones POV and being open IMO.