Under 30 - Coming Up and Coming Out

silentshout · 11-10-2010, 01:10 PM

I realized I was gay at 17. (bi around 11 or 12) I've never really came out. I don't see the point. Especially to family. I mean, I don't want them all up in my business. And if straight kids don't have to say anything, then I don't see the reason why I should.

lipstixgal · 11-10-2010, 01:15 PM

I never knew I was gay until my mid thirties and was married to a man at the time. But pursued a relationship anyway and now I am glad, wish I had someone at this time in my life but hopefully soon I will have a girlfriend who love and cares about me just wish I would have come out sooner...

Mtn · 11-10-2010, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by silentshout

I realized I was gay at 17. (bi around 11 or 12) I've never really came out. I don't see the point. Especially to family. I mean, I don't want them all up in my business. And if straight kids don't have to say anything, then I don't see the reason why I should.

I felt the same way for a long time, really until I started seeing women with children and it dawned on me by not coming out I was teaching them homophobia, they knew we weren't "just roommates" but the silence we practiced kept them silent about their lives as well. That was just my experience though.

silentshout · 11-10-2010, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mtn

I felt the same way for a long time, really until I started seeing women with children and it dawned on me by not coming out I was teaching them homophobia, they knew we weren't "just roommates" but the silence we practiced kept them silent about their lives as well. That was just my experience though.

Understandable. I'm sure my example isn't the best one for closeted youth, however I feel more at ease keeping it to myself. Once I come with a gf, then it's up to them to think what they want. Everyone has their own way, and some parents are more in tune to it than others.

Ravin · 11-10-2010, 03:03 PM

Hello Everyone..

I knew something was up in high school when I was paying more attention to the cheerleaders than the football players..
I had my first encounter in the 8th grade with a kiss and since then I have never looked back..
When you are young and finding out your sexuality it is hard at times but you always should remember to be true to yourself no matter who you are.

Pixie · 11-10-2010, 04:00 PM

Hello All!

I am 22 now and came out at 14, but knew a wee bit before that. It was never really hard coming out per say, I was worried and nervous, but I just dove out into the world.

I think for me the most challenging thing has been being a young femme. Not only do you have that time of questioning internally, long after a decision, you have the external questioning from others. Its like others think you will grow out of it because you are young. Or because you are femme there is "hope". *eye roll*

It is also interesting that identifying as queer gets treated like coping out of an answer. You get that look, so are you bi? It kinda makes me giggle.

......anywho off my soapbox of randomness....

Zimmeh · 11-10-2010, 06:11 PM

I agree with you about the queer part. It took my ex to show me what I had always wanted. I really did live up to the nickname a friend of mine gave me, and that is brat...Hehe..

Have a good night!

Zimmy

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pixie

Hello All!

I am 22 now and came out at 14, but knew a wee bit before that. It was never really hard coming out per say, I was worried and nervous, but I just dove out into the world.

I think for me the most challenging thing has been being a young femme. Not only do you have that time of questioning internally, long after a decision, you have the external questioning from others. Its like others think you will grow out of it because you are young. Or because you are femme there is "hope". *eye roll*

It is also interesting that identifying as queer gets treated like coping out of an answer. You get that look, so are you bi? It kinda makes me giggle.

......anywho off my soapbox of randomness....

11-10-2010, 01:10 PM	#1
silentshout Junior Member How Do You Identify?: andro Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: single Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Turlock, CA Posts: 12 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13 Thanked 16 Times in 6 Posts Rep Power: 5963	I realized I was gay at 17. (bi around 11 or 12) I've never really came out. I don't see the point. Especially to family. I mean, I don't want them all up in my business. And if straight kids don't have to say anything, then I don't see the reason why I should. __________________ "fortify is not a matter of events, it depends upon the tides with contentment for this is an impregnable fortress"

11-10-2010, 04:00 PM	#6
Pixie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Equal Opportunity Friend Preferred Pronoun?: Girl Relationship Status: in service Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Sacramento! Posts: 2,868 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,691 Thanked 4,103 Times in 1,332 Posts Rep Power: 15274784	Excuse the ramble Hello All! I am 22 now and came out at 14, but knew a wee bit before that. It was never really hard coming out per say, I was worried and nervous, but I just dove out into the world. I think for me the most challenging thing has been being a young femme. Not only do you have that time of questioning internally, long after a decision, you have the external questioning from others. Its like others think you will grow out of it because you are young. Or because you are femme there is "hope". eye roll It is also interesting that identifying as queer gets treated like coping out of an answer. You get that look, so are you bi? It kinda makes me giggle. ......anywho off my soapbox of randomness.... __________________ Unexplored glimmering in the rough How does a diamond hide? -Pixie-

11-10-2010, 01:15 PM	#2
lipstixgal Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: coupled Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: New Jersey Posts: 3,028 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 201 Thanked 1,690 Times in 1,064 Posts Rep Power: 1494761	I never knew I was gay until my mid thirties and was married to a man at the time. But pursued a relationship anyway and now I am glad, wish I had someone at this time in my life but hopefully soon I will have a girlfriend who love and cares about me just wish I would have come out sooner...

11-10-2010, 03:03 PM	#5
Ravin Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Girl Relationship Status: Otherside Of My Bed Is Empty Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Coast Line Posts: 13 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1 Thanked 18 Times in 9 Posts Rep Power: 6369	Hello Everyone.. I knew something was up in high school when I was paying more attention to the cheerleaders than the football players.. I had my first encounter in the 8th grade with a kiss and since then I have never looked back.. When you are young and finding out your sexuality it is hard at times but you always should remember to be true to yourself no matter who you are.