Dating "non single" people

WheelieStrong · 12-24-2010, 01:37 PM

Invictus i aggree with every word, she is not my ex because i want it that way, nor is she my care because i want it.

idealy i'd like someone for myself, and for me to be theirs but it just never happenned.

DomnNC · 12-24-2010, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WheelieStrong

Invictus i aggree with every word, she is not my ex because i want it that way, nor is she my care because i want it.

idealy i'd like someone for myself, and for me to be theirs but it just never happenned.

Wheelie, is there some chance you can reconcile with your ex since you said her being your ex was not what you wanted? I dunno, just sounds like there are a lot of unresolved issues between the two of you especially if she gets jealous if you see someone else. What about couples counseling? Even if you don't resolve things to get back together perhaps you can resolve things to the point that both of you can go ahead and live your lives without fear of recrimination from each other. Just a thought.

I do wish you the best in your choices and you can be a good person, anyone can. Just by you making this post and asking for opinions and being willing to deal with what's handed to you says that you have it in you to be a good person.

I wish you a most wonderful Christmas!

Random · 12-24-2010, 03:14 PM

What do you get from the relationship? What does he get from the relationship? Why can't he open up his primary relationship? Do you want him full time? does he want you full time?

There is absolutly nothing wrong with being a secondary, if that's what you really want... But settling on being second, just because that is the only way you can have the person in your life isn't that good a deal...

Can you find out if him having an open relationship is even on the table?

My thoughts are... Only do what you are willing to pay for... What are the costs?

If you are willing to pay the price.. You have weighed all the sides and found that you still want what you want and are willing to permantly alter someone for your needs to be met (because anyone who has been cheated on knows.. It permanantly alters who you are) then own it... Say, this is who I am... What I want is what matters...

If you are not wanting to be that person, then stop.. Don't be that person... That simple... You know what is going to happen if you continue on this road, someones world is going to be destroyed. Doesn't matter that you didn't mean it to happen, or that you feel bad about it.... You still do it, so own it...

Like Snow said... Don't do anything that doesn't let you look yourself in the eye or makes it hard for you to sleep at night... It's that simple...

12-24-2010, 03:14 PM	#3
Random Senior Member How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: back in the land of trees and snow Posts: 2,072 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,017 Thanked 5,327 Times in 1,378 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	What do you get from the relationship? What does he get from the relationship? Why can't he open up his primary relationship? Do you want him full time? does he want you full time? There is absolutly nothing wrong with being a secondary, if that's what you really want... But settling on being second, just because that is the only way you can have the person in your life isn't that good a deal... Can you find out if him having an open relationship is even on the table? My thoughts are... Only do what you are willing to pay for... What are the costs? If you are willing to pay the price.. You have weighed all the sides and found that you still want what you want and are willing to permantly alter someone for your needs to be met (because anyone who has been cheated on knows.. It permanantly alters who you are) then own it... Say, this is who I am... What I want is what matters... If you are not wanting to be that person, then stop.. Don't be that person... That simple... You know what is going to happen if you continue on this road, someones world is going to be destroyed. Doesn't matter that you didn't mean it to happen, or that you feel bad about it.... You still do it, so own it... Like Snow said... Don't do anything that doesn't let you look yourself in the eye or makes it hard for you to sleep at night... It's that simple... __________________ ~Volunteer~ "It gets in your blood"

12-24-2010, 01:37 PM	#1
WheelieStrong Junior Member How Do You Identify?: transman on Wheels Preferred Pronoun?: his, him, he, bitch, MINE lol Relationship Status: Hopeful, longing aching for her touch Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Stafford England Posts: 97 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 264 Thanked 142 Times in 57 Posts Rep Power: 57546	Invictus i aggree with every word, she is not my ex because i want it that way, nor is she my care because i want it. idealy i'd like someone for myself, and for me to be theirs but it just never happenned.