Lesbian bed death?

[waxnrope]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Most frequent to least frequent sex (many studies show)

1) male/male

2) female/male

3) female/female


The thought is testosterone = higher levels of sexual desire. The thought is that females need to have a positive emotional connection with their partner in order to desire sex ( or rather, females have more of a need for there to be no tension in the relationship in order to desire sex), more so than males. So, if you have two females together and there are difficulties in the relationship, less chance of sex happening than the other two couplings.

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My personal thoughts:

Lesbian bed death? = problem in relationship. Does it exist? Well, everyone's (all couplings) frequency in sexual relations decreases over time, so if female/female are having less sex to begin with, it makes sense that it could drop to zero, especially if there are problems in the relationship.

My opinion is that bed death could happen in any coupling if there are problems in the relationship.

Of course health impacts all this, as well.

Hey Dapper, please cite the source of this. Thanks

[The_Lady_Snow]

I gotta be honest, the bed often looks like "death bed" when I'm on my period.

That count!?

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by waxnrope

Hey Dapper, please cite the source of this. Thanks

http://www.webmd.com/sex/features/se...-women-compare

Not tough to find. The first one google came up with.

But, who cares, anyway? Meaning, it isn't a BAD thing if that is the case. It is ok if there truly is some differences between the sexes based on biology. I think that so many of us (me included), spend a lot of time trying to prove their is no differences, as if that is a bad thing.

And getting back to the topic, certainly not all women have a lower sex drive than all men. It is individual. But as a whole, yes... men tend to desire sex more often and have more sex than women do. Is this truly new for people?

Do you think that transmen are lying when they say that their sex drive went up after starting testosterone? Do you think this is just all in their heads or something?

[BullDog]

What's not new to me is all the perpetuation of myths about lesbians and women's sexuality.

[citybutch]

Perhaps I am too tired... but I see nothing in this article that indicates:

"Most frequent to least frequent sex (many studies show)

1) male/male

2) female/male

3) female/female "

What I do see is that mens libido's are more active than females and females sexuality is more fluid... neither of which indicates gay men have longer lasting sexual relationships (and more frequent) than lesbians.... It just says we express it differently...

What I found on Google... (which is by no means scientific)... is something more along the lines of:

"In biology and psychology, the Coolidge effect is a phenomenon—seen in nearly every mammalian species in which it has been tested—whereby both males and females exhibit continuous high sexual performance given the introduction of new receptive partners" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coolidge_effect

...that, in fact, reduced sexual activity is common with all types of couples.. The one study that I found that talked about Lesbian Bed Death and claimed the above "hierarchy" of sexual activity was highly criticized....

The fact is... no matter what kind of relationship one is in... intimacy is hard to maintain when so much of life such as work, career, school, stress, homeownership, children, family concerns, finances, etc etc etc... comes to the forefront. Any one of us can maintain a high level of sexual stimulation when we are in the initial first stages of knowing someone... Prolonged ongoing intimacy takes commitment... and yes, sometimes work... It means taking the relationship seriously enough to prioritize intimacy ... and discovering ways to express it.

Hollywood sells us a load of goods... "falling in love and living happily ever after.." You know, the story where the young couple is highly energized and magnetized towards each other... and then the movie ends with them walking into bliss... forever after. In fact, it really isn't that way at all... It takes focus, patience, strategy, respect, communication, love, and a mutual awareness that intimacy is important to both of you... and that you are both exactly where you want to be... Almost everyone I know in real time is in a long term relationship... and whether they are straight, gay, lesbian, or otherwise identified, we all talk about this the same way... and yes, we do discuss it with our gay male friends as well...

Originally Posted by DapperButch

http://www.webmd.com/sex/features/se...-women-compare

Not tough to find. The first one google came up with.

But, who cares, anyway? Meaning, it isn't a BAD thing if that is the case. It is ok if there truly is some differences between the sexes based on biology. I think that so many of us (me included), spend a lot of time trying to prove their is no differences, as if that is a bad thing.

And getting back to the topic, certainly not all women have a lower sex drive than all men. It is individual. But as a whole, yes... men tend to desire sex more often and have more sex than women do. Is this truly new for people?

Do you think that transmen are lying when they say that their sex drive went up after starting testosterone? Do you think this is just all in their heads or something?

[BullDog]

Yes there is one study about "Lesbian Bed Death" that got a lot of press and it has been heavily criticized for how it was conducted.

I know many gay male couples who are completely monogamous and have been together for many, many years- goes against the stereotype I know.