Single Butches & Femmes Cafe

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Originally Posted by Inuus

It's interesting how things are depending on where you live. My experience here in rural Oklahoma is that a lot of the women whether straight, gay or unknown dress more on the butch side. What I mean is it's not unusual to see women dressed as if they are or have been working on the ranch. I personally have not met any femmes here...although there is NO community to speak of in this town or area so ..well they could be around but it would be hard to tell.

I find the same thing here in Arkansas. I will see someone at the store, for example, wearing what ==I== would consider more "butch" attire, but oftentimes it is just a more 'country' look from straight women.

As for women being dressed "as if they are or have been working on the ranch" not "looking" like a femme, I have a question... I know there has been stuff on other threads about what being a femme means... I know with every cell of my being I AM a femme. Do I look the part of the magazine-cover femme? (is there one?). Nope, I don't. My preferred outfit each day is shorts or jeans and a t-shirt. I have short, spikey hair cause it lets me feel like I can have an ATTITUDE that kicks ass. And at the age of 59, I need all the 'tude I can get! I don't know, maybe I really AM more androgynous in looks, who cares? I think for ME, the important thing is what is inside, how I alone identify ME. I know that the ME of me is soft, loving, caring, eager to please, nurturing, bawdy, sensitive, and lots of other really cool things. AND I love football and fishing!

Maybe this issue here is the fact that it is sometimes hard to pinpoint whether someone is actually butch or femme (or gay for that matter!), and therefore harder to know whether one can approach or view the other as a possible mate. I know for me, my gaydar is all out of whack!

I also have a problem sometimes with thinking that all the butch women that are out there are going to be too young for me. My partners have all been younger than me from between 9-13 yrs younger. The 13 yr difference was really pushing it, but maybe it was just her.

[Inuus]

Originally Posted by ArkansasPiscesGrrl

I find the same thing here in Arkansas. I will see someone at the store, for example, wearing what ==I== would consider more "butch" attire, but oftentimes it is just a more 'country' look from straight women.

As for women being dressed "as if they are or have been working on the ranch" not "looking" like a femme, I have a question... I know there has been stuff on other threads about what being a femme means... I know with every cell of my being I AM a femme. Do I look the part of the magazine-cover femme? (is there one?). Nope, I don't. My preferred outfit each day is shorts or jeans and a t-shirt. I have short, spikey hair cause it lets me feel like I can have an ATTITUDE that kicks ass. And at the age of 59, I need all the 'tude I can get! I don't know, maybe I really AM more androgynous in looks, who cares? I think for ME, the important thing is what is inside, how I alone identify ME. I know that the ME of me is soft, loving, caring, eager to please, nurturing, bawdy, sensitive, and lots of other really cool things. AND I love football and fishing!

Maybe this issue here is the fact that it is sometimes hard to pinpoint whether someone is actually butch or femme (or gay for that matter!), and therefore harder to know whether one can approach or view the other as a possible mate. I know for me, my gaydar is all out of whack!

I also have a problem sometimes with thinking that all the butch women that are out there are going to be too young for me. My partners have all been younger than me from between 9-13 yrs younger. The 13 yr difference was really pushing it, but maybe it was just her.

I dont think I expressed myself correctly in my post, I must apologize for the confusion.

When I was posting about women looking like they worked on a ranch etc. I didnt mean that wasnt femme because trust me some of these women did look femme. Femme, to me anyways, is the way one carries themselves not defined as a "look" or what she happens to be wearing at the time.

With that being said, I guess the point I was trying to make was there are women here my gaydar(which also seems to have worn out over the years) isn't sure about and in most cases I dont even give it a second thought believing most likely they are straight women who own/work on ranches.

For what it's worth you sound like a lovely woman and it doesnt hurt, actually its a plus in my book, you like football and fishing.

[clay]

bumping an awesome thread

[Leigh]

I just came in to say hi to everyone, miss and love you all

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Stopping by to say hi to everyone! Hope your Saturday is going great for you all.

Had an awesome time at lunch today with a couple of femme goddesses from here on the Planet. Love love LOVE being able to feel that connection, love my femme sisters! I really had not realized just how valuable that time is to me.

And the fact that I could bring up a scary, personal topic of a *sexual* nature to them, and not have them freak out about me, was awesome. Having to almost shout the question over the 50 frat boys in the restaurant, it was priceless! *grinning* Love having femme sisters to hang with!

[Mr Nice Guy]

Single and hanging out. Oh I forgot to say hi.... "Hi"

[ScandalAndy]

me too! single, hanging out, and looking for adventure!

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Originally Posted by ElusiveButch

Single and hanging out. Oh I forgot to say hi.... "Hi"

Hi back at you, ElusiveButch! Hope your Sunday is going well!

APG

[SweetJane]

Originally Posted by ArkansasPiscesGrrl

Stopping by to say hi to everyone! Hope your Saturday is going great for you all.

Had an awesome time at lunch today with a couple of femme goddesses from here on the Planet. Love love LOVE being able to feel that connection, love my femme sisters! I really had not realized just how valuable that time is to me.

And the fact that I could bring up a scary, personal topic of a *sexual* nature to them, and not have them freak out about me, was awesome. Having to almost shout the question over the 50 frat boys in the restaurant, it was priceless! *grinning* Love having femme sisters to hang with!

I, too, enjoying hanging with the "family." I had a late lunch with a butch-femme couple I know today and it was great hearing how they met and they even answered some of my intimate questions, too. It's great when you can connect like that....